What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef. What do you call a cow with 3 legs? Lean beef. What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Your mom.
What’s a depressed kids favorite holiday… Christmas because everything is hanging
so if the reason people used to hang women because they were seen as witches back in the day, if boys were to be hung would they be called wizards?
To the guy asking what joy I find in suicide jokes, the answer is simple. I make suicide jokes to cope with my crippling depression. Must be working, cause I’m still here
Q: What did one emo kid say to the other emo kid? A: Wanna hang out?
I saw this little girl crying I asked her where her parents where she cried more man I love working at an orphanage
The only time you see a depressed person lifted up - when they hang themselves.
Friend #1: “Yo guys, what’s the most unfair game you’ve ever played? For me it’s Fortnite.” Friend #2: “I’d have to say Monopoly.” Me: “The most unfair game you say? Life, definitely. Like, no one wins, it’s a one-way game.” Friend #2: “Uhh…that’s not exactly what he meant…” Friend #1: calls the suicide hotline
Person A: cmon person B, just be happy, smile Person B: over my dead body Person B: gets the noose
A teacher was teaching her second-grade class about the government, so for homework that one day, she told her students to ask their parents what the government is. When Little Johnny got home that day, he went up to his dad and ask him what the government was. His dad thought for a while and answered, “Look at it this way: I’m the president, your mom is Congress, your maid is the workforce, you are the people and your baby brother is the future.’’ “I still don’t get it” responded the Little Johnny. “Why don’t you sleep on it then? Maybe you’ll understand it better,” said the dad. “Okay then…good night” said Little Jonny went off to bed. In the middle of the night, Little Johnny was awakened by his baby brother’s crying. He went to his baby brother’s crib and found that his baby brother had taken a crap in his diaper. So Little Johnny went to his parent’s room to get help. When he got to his parent’s bedroom, he looked through the keyhole to check if his parents were asleep. Through the keyhole, he saw his mom loudly snoring, but his dad wasn’t there. So he went to the maid’s room. When he looked through the maid’s room keyhole, he saw his dad having sex with his maid. Little Johnny was surprised, but then he just realized something and thinks aloud, ‘‘OH!! Now I understand the government! The President is screwing the workforce, Congress is fast asleep, nobody cares about the people, and the future is full of s**t!’’
what did the rope and the tree say to the kid do you want to hang later
What was Stephen Hawkins last words? System failure
What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn’t matter, he won’t come anyway.
When your sad don’t feel down about yourself break someone’s leg and laugh.
I am a failure to everyone and decided to attemp a suicide, guess what? I failed
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