I’ll never forget my aunt’s last words before she died “can you stop shaking the latter please”
I remember my grandfathers last words: Are you holding the ladder
What do you call Amber Heard crying during the lawsuit? A DEPPression. (If you are a fan of either Johnny Depp or Amber Heard, you might get the joke)
I saw my friend hang themselves my response was i guess they wanted to hang with someone
you tell an orphan joke to an orphan you start laughing they start crying they say they are going to tell their mom then you start laughing harder
grandfathers last words :Stop shaking the ladder you cunt Grandmother last words : you know how to use that hammer Dads last words : Always aim before you shoot that gun Moms last words : Turn of the stove when you’re done My last thought : am I a murder
I wish my hair was depressed Cause then it would cut itself
Are you a toaster? Bc I want to take a bath w you ;)
What was Stephen Hawkins last words? System failure
Famous last words: I COULD EAT THIS IN ONE BITE!
what do depressed people and Apple’s have in common? they both hang from trees
The best night of my life was when gave my virginity to wife and her last word was when she called me “Mommy” at the top of her lungs before I knocked her up ??.
I’ll always remember my dads last words… Why do you have an axe we live in the city
(Just a joke) when Stephen Hawking fell over and hurt his leg, his dad said " It’ll get better just walk it off."
What’s the difference between a man and a table. The table doesn’t cry when I break it’s legs
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