One night a girl said to her family "Goodnight Mommy, Goodnight Daddy, Goodnight Grandma, Goodbye Grandpa. the next morning her grandpa died. That night she said "Goodnight mommy, Goodnight daddy, Goodbye Grandma. the next morning the grandma died. The dad started to fear for his life because he was next. That night the girl said "Goodnight mommy, Goodbye daddy. the next morning the dad woke up and he was perfectly fine but when he went into the kitchen he saw his wife crying. when he asked her whats wrong she said “The Mail Man died”.
To avoid getting drafted, a young man slips into a nunnery to hide from some draft board agents who are after him. Desperate, he approaches a nun and asks her to hide him. “Get under my robes,” says the nun. “No one will look for you there.” The nun lifts up her robes and the man says, “Hey, that’s a fine pair of legs you have there, sister.” “Yeah, well if you look a bit higher you’ll see a fine set of balls, ” replies the nun. “I didn’t want to get drafted either.”
Q: what happened when the depressed kid wanted to high five the tree? A: It left him/her/them hanging
I’ll Never Forget My Grandfathers Last Words “STOP SHAKING THE LADDER YOU LITTLE CUNT!”
I don’t call it suicide. I call it population control
Wanna hear some famous last words? “We are just experiencing some turbulence”
I started beating my washing machine beacause it wasn’t working, my wife started crying. Knock knock Who’s there Insomnia You’ll fit right in along with Depression and anxiety, you can help keep me awake at night because Depression is struggling with that… Well now I can "t cry myself to sleep anymore…
I’ll remember my last words…“SORRY IM NOT SORRY”
Famous last words: I COULD EAT THIS IN ONE BITE!
Once there was a girl named Sally! She had no arms or legs, was mute, deaf, and blind Knock knock Who’s there? Not sally
where do you find a dog with no arms or legs -where you left it
Why did Logan Paul go to the suicide forest? to see who’s hanging around.
Where does a girl with one leg work? IHOP.
my sons so ungrateful. i bought him a trampoline and all he does is sit in his wheelchair and cry all day.
Where do you find a turtle with no legs? Right where you left it.
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