life’s too short to want it.
The depressed kid went to high five the tree… but the tree left them hanging… Children are like a box of Christmas decorations. I keep ‘em in my basement until it’s time to hang ‘em from a tree.
Little Johnny’s sister Suzy sees her mom in the shower and asks what is that between your legs? Her mom responds, “That is my garage”. The next day Suzy sees her dad in the shower and says, “What is that between your legs?” Her dad answers, “It is a motorcycle that gets parked in mommy’s garage.” The next day Suzy came to dinner with blood all over her hands. Her mom asks, “Why is there blood all over your hands Suzy?” Suzy says, " Well… little Johnny tried to put his motorcycle in my garage so I ripped its wheels off."
I started crying when my mom was cutting up onions Onions was a good dog
What do emos and apples have in common? They both hang on trees.
Yo mamma is so ugly she made blind kids cry
What was Stephen Hawkins last words? System failure
What is the difference between a sloth and a depressed kid? A sloth doesn’t need a rope to hang
The depressed kid at school tried giving the tree a high five It left him hanging
What is the difference between a Old Chest and a kid? One doesn’t cry when you drop it in the basement.
I remember grandpas last words “oh shit it’s in drive”
(Just a joke) when Stephen Hawking fell over and hurt his leg, his dad said " It’ll get better just walk it off."
I started beating my washing machine beacause it wasn’t working, my wife started crying. Knock knock Who’s there Insomnia You’ll fit right in along with Depression and anxiety, you can help keep me awake at night because Depression is struggling with that… Well now I can "t cry myself to sleep anymore…
What do suicidal people do in their spare time? Hang out.
What has 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
RUS | ENG
