Sometimes i get jealous when my phone dies
Why did the strawberry cry? – Because his mother was in a jam.
Denki- hey mineta i have a joke Mineta- …go on… Denki- Ochakos booty Mineta- i dont get it? Denki- exactly Mineta- cries T_T
Friend #1: “Whats your favourite thing about trees?” Friend #2: “Apples” Me: “I can hang myself in them.”
The depressed kid went to give a tree a high five… …but it left him hanging.
I will never forget my Grandpa’s last words, “What are you doing with that rope and saw”
Once I saw A girl crying and asked where are your parents; God I love working at orphanages.
Where do you find a turtle with no legs? Right where you left it.
When i was at work i say this kid crying i said where are your parents. God i love working in a orphanage
Q: what happened when the depressed kid wanted to high five the tree? A: It left him/her/them hanging
Why did the turkey cross the road twice? To prove he wasn’t a chicken!
(Just a joke) when Stephen Hawking fell over and hurt his leg, his dad said " It’ll get better just walk it off."
Are you a toaster? Bc I want to take a bath w you ;)
i will never forget my mother and fathers last words WHERE THE SAM HELL DID YOU GET A GRANADE
A man walks into a bar. Sits down and asks the bartender for 12 shots of vodka. The bartender asks what the man is celebrating for and said he’ll give one shot on the house. The man said I celebrating my first blowjob. And nah if 12 shots doesn’t get the taste out of my mouth nothing will.
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