Why were the cherries ?? crying? Because their parents were in a jam.
Other girls be like “I want a 6ft guy”, meanwhile I want to be 6ft under ????
Me: Knock knock…Friend: who’s there? Me: I don’t know anymore
When its been halloween for a few months but there’s still a body hanging from your neighbours tree
Q:What did one koala say to the other? A:Hows it hanging.??
“Go big or go home”, that’s what some people say. “Go loud and proud”, that’s what other people say. “Go out with a big, loud bang!”, that’s what I say.
Where does a girl with one leg work? IHOP.
Bought my son a trampoline for his birthday, the ungrateful f@cker just sat in his wheelchair and cried
Bro I love hanging out with white people, its either we play Yahtzee Or We Playin Nazi
Me: want to play 911 My little brother: what’s that Me: It’s where i kick your legs and you fall
I went to visit my friends sick grandpa. He was lying in a hospital bed connected to a lot of tubes. When I approached him he kept repeating “Ni caizhe wo de yangqi guan” Suddenly right in front of me, he passed. Later that night I translated his last words, and they were “You’re standing on my oxygen tube”
What’s the difference between a coat hangerband an emo? Nothing that both hang
what’s the difference between an onion and a baby? nobody cries when you cut up the baby.
When the emo kid hangs himself and the autistic kid thinks that it’s a pinata… BATTER UP TO THE PLATE!
Dont say your life is a joke because jokes got meaning.
RUS | ENG
