Dark Humor

I wish I could say that my life is a joke but I can’t because jokes have a meaning

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What do suicidal people do in their spare time? Hang out.

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I wont ever Forget my dads last words: “OH GOD THE POLICE!!!”

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A girl noticed hair growing between her legs and asked her mom about it. Her mom said it was her monkey and it grows hair.so she told her sister and her sister said that aint nothing mines already eating bananas

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“I bought my little sister a trampoline for her birthday but all she wants to do is sit in her wheelchair and cry”

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What do you call a person with no arms or legs at your front door? Mat

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I’ll never forget my brother’s last words: “Why is there a revolver in your hand?”

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Any game: Are you a boy or a girl? Non-binary people: cries

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Why are washers better than babies? Washers don’t cry when you put a load in it.

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what do you call a dog with no legs? It don’t matter what you call it. It ain’t coming.

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Why did the Chinese woman hang up? Because she Wang the Wong number

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There once was a little girl named Sarah with no arms and legs. knock knock Who’s there! Not Sarah.

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Me: Calls 9-1-1 Operator: 9/11 what’s your emergency? Me: hangs up

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What do you call a pig with no legs? A groundhog.

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Me: Man I wish my clothes were emo. Friend:Why? Me:so they would hang themselves

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