Dark Humor

To whoever has my voodoo doll, please hold its hand.

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Why do orphans cry at insurance places They got offered the family plan

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whats the difference between a maze and a depressed life? one of them you can find a way out of

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Why do trees never call emo kids? The emos always hang up on them.

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Why does sumo wrestlers shave their legs? Because they don’t want to be mistaken as feminists

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I cannot moderate myself at all. It’s either I don’t take my meds, or I take the entire bottle. Decisions decisions… Bleach solves so many problems, Staines, Dirty dishes, messes, and over population

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The depressed kid went to high five the tree… but the tree left them hanging… Children are like a box of Christmas decorations. I keep ‘em in my basement until it’s time to hang ‘em from a tree.

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What happened when the emo kid tried to high 5 a tree? It left him hanging

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Sex is like math. Subtract the clothes, Add the bed, Divide the legs, and pray to God there is no multiplying.

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Me: Wanna play 9/11? Friend: What’s that? Me: Its a game where I kick you in both legs and watch you fall.

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What do you call a Chinese man with one leg? Tie won shu

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what has two legs and is red all over? half a cat

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What’s the similarity between a Christmas ornament and a person? They both hang…

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why do emos like circles because they can hang out with them

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A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He yelled, "Doctor! Doctor! I can’t feel my legs!" The Doctor replies, “I know, I amputated your arms.”

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