Dark Humor

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Me: Knock knock…Friend: who’s there? Me: I don’t know anymore

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my advice to suicidal people: just hang in there ??

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A man is about to be hanged. His executioner asks for his last words. The man says: “Man, it’s hard to think of something when your life is on the line.”

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I’ll never forget my dad’s last words. “Erase my search history, son.”

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Why couldn’t the emo kid hang himself? After eating through his feelings the belt wouldn’t fit around his neck

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a man walks into a bar, and notices a steak hanging from the ceiling. when he asks the bartender about it, the bartender says “If you can jump up and hit it, drinks are on the house for the night, but if you miss, everyone’s drinks are on your tab for the next two hours. Do you want to try? ” the man decided not to take the risk. he thought the steaks where too high.

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What has 4 legs and 1 arm? A Doberman in a playground.

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me: have you ever went sky diving friend:No me:Well don’t it sucks friend:Why me:They gave me a parachute and I lived

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Watches sad movie with family Everyone else: Crying Sister: How aren’t you crying? Me: I have no tear left to cry…

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