3 men walk into heaven at the same time. they all live in the same city. god asks the first man “how did you die?” the man says “I have a heart condition and iv’e been suspecting my wife of cheating for some time. anyway I get how from work and I see my wife on the bed and a man hang of the balcony. I get so mad and stomp on the guys fingers! he falls into a bush so I throw a refrigerator on him.” God asks the next man “how did you die?” the man says I was cleaning the windows and then this crazy man starts stomping on my fingers! luckily I fall safely in a bush! but then a refrigerator falls on me! " god asks the third man he says" I was the one in the fridge!"
What’s the similarity between a broken pencil and my life? They’re both pointless.
What’s the difference between an emo and my clothes? my clothes don’t hang themselves.
why do we tell actors to break a leg … so they can get in the cast!
When the emo kid hangs himself and the autistic kid thinks that it’s a pinata… BATTER UP TO THE PLATE!
What is the difference between a washing machine and a child…? The washing machine doesn’t cry when you put a load in it.
When you realize you have depression and depression realize how stupid you were
A pirate walked into a bar with his ship’s steering wheel hanging off his pants. The bartender says, “Hey! What’s with the steering wheel?” The pirate says, “I don’t know but it’s driving me nuts! ” I got detention yesterday because I told the emo kid to “Hang in there.”
I’ll never forget my dad’s last words. “Erase my search history, son.”
Kids are so ungrateful sometimes. I bought a wheelchair for my son, Did he say thank you? Nope! That mtf just sat in his wheelchair the whole time crying the whole day.??
Emo kids counting be like: 1,2,3 come hang with me! 4,5,6 Gonna get new slits! 7,8,9 Suicide! 10,11,12 Bring some pills!
Why did potassium draw a tear that would consult in him crying? Because all of his friends argon
I’ll never forget my father’s last words… Oh f@ck, it’s a bus!
If you jump off a bridge while crying, it’s suicide, but if you jump off a bridge while screaming parquor it’s a failed stunt.
Q:What was my son’s last words before he died. A:Bye dad i am going to school.
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