Dark Humor

What made me laugh? The fact that my life is a joke:")

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I will never forget my Grandpa’s last words, “What are you doing with that rope and saw”

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Are you a toaster? Bc I want to take a bath w you ;)

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Why do orphans cry at insurance places They got offered the family plan

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Me: Calls 9-1-1 Operator: 9/11 what’s your emergency? Me: hangs up

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I started crying when dad was cutting onions. Onions was such a good dog.

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I remember my grandfathers last words: Are you holding the ladder

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Why is sex like math? You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.

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Person: where do i commit sucide Dog: roof Person: good idea

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i have no friends but then i realize my true friends are anxiety and depression

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What’s a similarity Cliff Hanger and Nooses? They both leave you Hanging

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Teacher : Who here has thought about committing suicide? Half of the class : raises hand Teacher : … The half of the class: Starts talking about how they were thinking of doing it

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Why did the strawberry cry? – Because his mother was in a jam.

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If somebody cuts their leg off and hits you with it. Works they be kicking or hitting you?

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why do we tell actors to break a leg … so they can get in the cast!

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