1.) What’s Yellow And Can’t Swim? A Bus Full Of Children 2.) Did you hear bout the pilsbury dough boy? he died of a yeast infection 3.) I will never forget my grandads last words… “you’re still holding the ladder right?” 4.) I have a fish that can breakdance… only for 20 seconds though, and only once 5.) give a man a match and he will be warm for a few hours… lite a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life
I will always remember my grandpa’s last words. SHIT, THE LADDER IS FALLING!
What’s under the bottom? Your legs.
I’ve looked everywhere… I just can’t seem to find where I left my will to live
according to all known laws of aviation, a bee should not be able to fly, it wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. but of course, bees fly anyway because bees don’t care about what humans think is impossible, Yellow, Black. Yellow, Black
I’ll never forget my aunt’s last words before she died “can you stop shaking the latter please”
Life is like a box of chocolates, mostly dissapointing
Watches sad movie with family Everyone else: Crying Sister: How aren’t you crying? Me: I have no tear left to cry…
What do you call a man that has no arms, no legs and sits in front of your door? Mat.
Famous last words: “Don’t worry man, it’s not even loaded.”
I told the judge I thought she was unconscious before she woke up crying. The judge asked: why didn’t you drug her again so she would forget?
What do you say to your sister when she’s crying? – “Are you having a crisis?”
what’s the difference between an onion and a baby? nobody cries when you cut up the baby.
people call me a bad person but just the other day i saw a little kid crying and asked him where were his parents , i love working at the orphanage At school, bobby boy’s classmate tells him some depressing stuff. Later that day, bobby comes home crying and his mom greets him at the door with “why are you crying”. Bobby says “someone said my grandpa died, but when did he die”. His mom looks him straight in the eye and says “depends, which one are you referring to?”
i saw a little kid crying yesterday, so i asked him where his parents were. God i love working at an orphanage
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