Dark Humor

What does my head and hell have in common? They both have demons in them

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I was crying at school telling my friends my grandpa died, And they asked me what his last words were. His last words were “Are you still holding the ladder?”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

Grandpa’s last words,why do you have a chain saw

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I remember grandpas last words “oh shit it’s in drive”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What does PEMDAS stand for? Please End My Depression And Suffering

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

If you ever feel depressed, drink some coffee. Expresso Expresso, no more depresso!

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What has two legs but can’t walk? Pants ??

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What do you call a prostitute with no arm or legs Cash and carry

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

What Do You Say To A One Legged Hitch Hiker Hop In

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What do you call a woman with one leg? Eileen.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Other girls be like “I want a 6ft guy”, meanwhile I want to be 6ft under ????

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Stephen Hawking’s last words were, “Ethernet cable not detected, shutting down.”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I walked into the kitchen and saw my wife chopping up onions which made me cry. Onions was a good dog.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I’ll never forget my sister’s last word. “Is it edible?”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Me, trying to interact with people: “Hey, are you a rope? Because I really wanna HANG with you” Person I’m talking to: Pulling out phone to call suicide hotline “haha what”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
- up - << N E X T! >> random

© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2026