Dark Humor

Why is sex like math? You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.

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i went to a butcher house with my little cousin and seen a baby pig and told her look its pepa pig she started crying

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What do you call a dog with no legs ? It doesn’t matter he isn’t coming to you.

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A depressed boy went to high five a tree guess what the tree did? The tree left him hanging

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I still remember my grandpas last words stop wobbling the ladder you cunt

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What does PEMDAS stand for? Please End My Depression And Suffering

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I have an auntie who has no arms and no legs. She is my dad’s half sister.

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Q: What did one emo kid say to the other emo kid? A: Wanna hang out?

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I am a failure to everyone and decided to attemp a suicide, guess what? I failed

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Q:How do you make a door cry A:Twist it’s knob

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I could never forget my grandfathers last words. “Stop shaking the ladd-”

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Me and a person downtown. Person: Hey, crazy Saturday night. Me: I guess so. Person: Why do people do crazy stuff like this? Me: I don’t know. I used too, but don’t anymore. Person: why’d you stop? Me: unfortunately, I lived every time I’d try something.

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If you ever feel depressed, drink some coffee. Expresso Expresso, no more depresso!

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How do you make a builder cry? Kill his family

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I still remember my granpas last words: turn the lawn mower off!

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