life’s too short to want it.
I remember my grandfathers last words: Are you holding the ladder
so if the reason people used to hang women because they were seen as witches back in the day, if boys were to be hung would they be called wizards?
Why were the cherries ?? crying? Because their parents were in a jam.
Me: Knock knock…Friend: who’s there? Me: I don’t know anymore
Orphans are the best targets for bullying, since who they gonna cry too? their parents?
Why is sex like math? You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.
What is the worst motivational thing to say to a depressed person? If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.
I’m going to hang myself in the bathroom at school and put a note telling kids that I’m a pinata
what fell down the tree first the emo or the apple guess what the apple because the emo got left hanging
Why does sumo wrestlers shave their legs? Because they don’t want to be mistaken as feminists
You can’t YEE your last H A W! but I put my BALLS in ur JAW.
What do emos and apples have in common? They both hang on trees.
people call me a bad person but just the other day i saw a little kid crying and asked him where were his parents , i love working at the orphanage At school, bobby boy’s classmate tells him some depressing stuff. Later that day, bobby comes home crying and his mom greets him at the door with “why are you crying”. Bobby says “someone said my grandpa died, but when did he die”. His mom looks him straight in the eye and says “depends, which one are you referring to?”
There’s a man in Florida with no arms or legs who is armed and on the run
RUS | ENG
