Dark Humor

my grandpas last words were, why is there a body in my kitchen. no witnessess

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When I saw a girl sitting on the ground crying When I asked her where her parents were, she cried louder That’s why I like to volunteer in an orphanage

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Why do trees never call emo kids? The emos always hang up on them.

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i will never forget my mother and fathers last words WHERE THE SAM HELL DID YOU GET A GRANADE

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Sex is like math. Subtract the clothes, Add the bed, Divide the legs, and pray to God there is no multiplying.

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Kid:what is between moms legs? Dad:paridise. Kid whats between you legs? Dad:the key to paridise. Kid:well uou better change the lock the neighbor has the key to.

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why arent emos n trees friends? cus the tree leaves them hanging

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Friend 1:Eyyy gurl Me:Hey! (Fake smile) Friend 2:hey g-guys what "bout we play would you rather? 6 hours later Friend 2:So (name) would u rather? 1.“Hang” out with me Or 2.“Jump” 1 times? Me…e-eh?..Why not both???we could just "Jump while “Hanging” out right?

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I will remember my biker buddies last words ?Why did you cut in front of me?.

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Any game: Are you a boy or a girl? Non-binary people: cries

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Me and a person downtown. Person: Hey, crazy Saturday night. Me: I guess so. Person: Why do people do crazy stuff like this? Me: I don’t know. I used too, but don’t anymore. Person: why’d you stop? Me: unfortunately, I lived every time I’d try something.

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whats the difference between a maze and a depressed life? one of them you can find a way out of

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