When its been halloween for a few months but there’s still a body hanging from your neighbours tree
after a surgery, a man claimed he couldn’t feel his legs, i replied “OF COURSE NOT, I AMPUTATED YOUR f@ckING ARMS!”
“I bought my little sister a trampoline for her birthday but all she wants to do is sit in her wheelchair and cry”
I will always remember my grandpa’s last words. SHIT, THE LADDER IS FALLING!
Dont say your life is a joke because jokes got meaning.
Emo kids counting be like: 1,2,3 come hang with me! 4,5,6 Gonna get new slits! 7,8,9 Suicide! 10,11,12 Bring some pills!
Orphans are the best targets for bullying, since who they gonna cry too? their parents?
friend: hey,wanna play hid and seek? me:sure, i’ve got a great spot! me: grabs nuce and runs to my closet
Denki- hey mineta i have a joke Mineta- …go on… Denki- Ochakos booty Mineta- i dont get it? Denki- exactly Mineta- cries T_T
Q:What did one koala say to the other? A:Hows it hanging.??
What do you call a woman with one leg? Eileen.
A girl noticed hair growing between her legs and asked her mom about it. Her mom said it was her monkey and it grows hair.so she told her sister and her sister said that aint nothing mines already eating bananas
what has two legs and is red all over? half a cat
Wanna hear some famous last words? “We are just experiencing some turbulence”
“Boom, quick; you have five seconds to give me three reasons to live.” “1…2…3 ……4…5…” Did you noticed you said nothing at all?
RUS | ENG
