Dark Humor

Life is like a penis simple,soft,relaxed,and hanging free.until a woman comes around and makes it hard

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these are all of my terrible jokes Two antennas met on a roof, they fell in love and got married. The ceremony was alright but the reception was amazing A jumper cable walks into a bar and the bartender said "I’ll serve you but don’t start anything A dyslexic man walks into a bra Two cannibals are eating a clown, one says "does this taste funny to you, I’m

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Chuck Norris doesn’t turn on his shower, he just stares at it until it cries

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I will never forget my Grandpa’s last words, “What are you doing with that rope and saw”

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I’m like a broken refrigerator, cool but broken inside

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1.) What’s Yellow And Can’t Swim? A Bus Full Of Children 2.) Did you hear bout the pilsbury dough boy? he died of a yeast infection 3.) I will never forget my grandads last words… “you’re still holding the ladder right?” 4.) I have a fish that can breakdance… only for 20 seconds though, and only once 5.) give a man a match and he will be warm for a few hours… lite a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life

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Life is like a box of chocolates, mostly dissapointing

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The last words my Dad spoke before he passed was, “Honey put down the knife we were only talking about getting a divorce.”

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