Dark Humor

Snow everywhere, it’s Christmas time. A person looks at the tree. The person: Only last thing left to hang! He grabs a noose.

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What’s the difference between a baby and an onion ? One cries when you peel its skin off, the other makes you cry when you peel its skin off.

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What has 4 legs and 1 arm? A Doberman in a playground.

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I will always remember my grandpa’s last words. SHIT, THE LADDER IS FALLING!

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I remember my dad’s last words “I met your father.”

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knock knock whos their boo boo who well you dont have to cry about it gary

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What were Princess Dianas last words? Have you been Dri…

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What is the worst motivational thing to say to a depressed person? If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.

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What do you call a smurf with no arms or legs? A paintball

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I can’t hang out with a emo when they are sad? Why? Because it cuts deeply

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What do you call a sheep with no legs? A cloud

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The depressed kid went to high five the tree… but the tree left them hanging… Children are like a box of Christmas decorations. I keep ‘em in my basement until it’s time to hang ‘em from a tree.

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I’ve looked everywhere… I just can’t seem to find where I left my will to live

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What has two legs but can’t walk? Pants ??

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What do you call a guy with no arms and legs, at you front door? Matt

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