Dark Humor

What do you call a person with no arms or legs at your front door? Mat

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I will never forget my grandpa’s last words: Alahu-Akbar i will remember my aunties last word: if you shoot me you pen-s is small (gun shot)

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what has two legs and is red all over? half a cat

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Kid:what is between moms legs? Dad:paridise. Kid whats between you legs? Dad:the key to paridise. Kid:well uou better change the lock the neighbor has the key to.

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I bet my friend $5 that he would die drowning. A depressing but satisfying victory.

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Whats Big, bounces, and make little kids cry? my donation to the orphanage :)

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I tried to high five a tree it left me hanging

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I tried to high five a tree, but it just left me hanging.

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The best night of my life was when gave my virginity to wife and her last word was when she called me “Mommy” at the top of her lungs before I knocked her up ??.

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I will never forget my grandfathers last words. “The f@ck you doing whit that knife

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Are you a toaster? Bc I want to take a bath w you ;)

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i will never forget my little brothers last word rip. his last words: paint dosent taste good

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Are you suicide, cause you’re always on my mind

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whats the similarities between an emo and some Christmas lights they are both going to be hanging from a tree

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If you watch " jaws" backward it will be a heartwarming story about a shark who giving arms and legs to disable people

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