Famous last words of my uncle: (a bomb disposal expert) yes the red wire
If you were a food what would you be? Friend 1-Pizza cause I’m so cheesy Friend 2-Chocolate chip cookie cause I have lots of friends Me-donut cause I’m so empty inside
This man got his left arm and left leg cut off and someone asked him “How are You?” And he said “I’m all right now.”
Why were the cherries ?? crying? Because their parents were in a jam.
Once i was walking along the beach and there was a girl with no arms or legs there, i walked by and she said excuse me, will you touch me ive never been touched before, i was like okay so i touched her, i kept on walking along and there was the same girl, she said sir will you kiss me, i went alright so i went up and kissed her, i thought that was weird but anyway i kept walking along and there she was again, she said sir will you f@ck me? I went okay so i picked her up and threw her in the ocean and went YOUR f@ckED NOW
Why didnt Logan Paul high five the asain man…because he loves to leave asains hanging
I could never forget my grandfathers last words. “Stop shaking the ladd-”
what do depressed people and Apple’s have in common? they both hang from trees
whats the similarities between an emo and some Christmas lights they are both going to be hanging from a tree
Why did the strawberry cry? – Because his mother was in a jam.
what did the rope and the tree say to the kid do you want to hang later
Why did i walk across the road? to get hit by a car
What do you call a cow with no legs Ground beef…haha…no one likes my jokes
where do you find a dog with no arms or legs -where you left it
I’ll never forget my bosses last words: " We shall serve the best meat in our burgers! "
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