I remember my dad’s last words “I met your father.”
i got in trouble in school for leaving the depressed kid hanging
The depressed kid went to high five the tree… but the tree left them hanging… Children are like a box of Christmas decorations. I keep ‘em in my basement until it’s time to hang ‘em from a tree.
Famous last words of my uncle: (a bomb disposal expert) yes the red wire
A depressed boy went to high five a tree guess what the tree did? The tree left him hanging
Q:What was my son’s last words before he died. A:Bye dad i am going to school.
what did the suicidal kid say to the tree? dont leave me hanging
What do you call a guy with no arms and legs, at you front door? Matt
Where does a girl with one leg work? IHOP.
Why are washers better than babies? Washers don’t cry when you put a load in it.
The teacher asked her student to say the alphabet , The student recited the alphabet abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz, Where’s the p, He looked down to the floor and said : it’s running down my legs
I love Brussel sprouts more than I love myself
What do you call a woman with one arm and one leg? Eileen Doctor approaches a patient in Hospital and says “I have some good news and bad news" so the patient says “What is the bad news?” the Doctor replies “I have had to amputate both your legs” so the patent says “Well what is the good news? ” the Doctor replies "I have found someone to buy your slippers”…
I am a failure to everyone and decided to attemp a suicide, guess what? I failed
I started beating my washing machine beacause it wasn’t working, my wife started crying. Knock knock Who’s there Insomnia You’ll fit right in along with Depression and anxiety, you can help keep me awake at night because Depression is struggling with that… Well now I can "t cry myself to sleep anymore…
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