I know Im valuable, I come with a barcode ;)
I’ll remember my last words…“SORRY IM NOT SORRY”
Why did the sea cry ? Because it felt salty and blue
“Oh waiter! Waiter!” “Yes sir?” “Do you have frog’s legs?” “Why yes” “Good. Now hop along and get me a steak!”
Wanna hear somethin’ ironic? When one cutter tells another cutter to stop, but he himself can’t stop cutting.
What do you call a pig with no legs? A groundhog.
Why did the strawberry cry? – Because his mother was in a jam.
My mom told me its not healthy to stay in my room all day…but the only places I’m allowed to go to are my room and downstairs.
whats the difference between a maze and a depressed life? one of them you can find a way out of
When your sad don’t feel down about yourself break someone’s leg and laugh.
Can some hot depressed suicidal guh give me his number so we can cry about being depressed and wanting to die…
Lets make a joke on how depressing monday is to ignore how depressing everyday is.
Little Jonny walks in on his parents having sex. He asks what their doing and the father says: “Well…We’re making you a brother.” So little Jonny runs off to let his parents finish, happy that he’s going to have a brother soon. The next day when little Jonny’s father comes come Jonny is crying out on the driveway. The father sits down next to Jonny and asks what’s wrong. Jonny cries: “I won’t have a baby brother!” HIs father is confused. “What do you mean?” He asks. “Because the mailman came by today and ate him!”
The emo kid tried to high five the tree But the tree left him hanging
What do you call a prostitute with no arm or legs Cash and carry
RUS | ENG
