To the guy asking what joy I find in suicide jokes, the answer is simple. I make suicide jokes to cope with my crippling depression. Must be working, cause I’m still here
What do you come a dog with no legs? It don’t matter what you it, cause it ain’t gonna come to you.
Teacher : Who here has thought about committing suicide? Half of the class : raises hand Teacher : … The half of the class: Starts talking about how they were thinking of doing it
I still remember my grandpas last words stop wobbling the ladder you cunt
The most powerful thing in the world is babies. This is because they cry and get what every they want.
Friend #1: “Whats your favourite thing about trees?” Friend #2: “Apples” Me: “I can hang myself in them.”
“Boom, quick; you have five seconds to give me three reasons to live.” “1…2…3 ……4…5…” Did you noticed you said nothing at all?
What is the worst motivational thing to say to a depressed person? If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.
What’s the difference between a man and a table. The table doesn’t cry when I break it’s legs
If you jump off a bridge while crying, it’s suicide, but if you jump off a bridge while screaming parquor it’s a failed stunt.
What were Princess Dianas last words? Have you been Dri…
why do we tell actors to break a leg … so they can get in the cast!
Me: Man I wish my clothes were emo. Friend:Why? Me:so they would hang themselves
I can barely remember the last words my uncle told me let go of my nose
I’ll never forget my bosses last words: " We shall serve the best meat in our burgers! "
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