Snow everywhere, it’s Christmas time. A person looks at the tree. The person: Only last thing left to hang! He grabs a noose.
people call me a bad person but just the other day i saw a little kid crying and asked him where were his parents , i love working at the orphanage At school, bobby boy’s classmate tells him some depressing stuff. Later that day, bobby comes home crying and his mom greets him at the door with “why are you crying”. Bobby says “someone said my grandpa died, but when did he die”. His mom looks him straight in the eye and says “depends, which one are you referring to?”
What is the difference between a Old Chest and a kid? One doesn’t cry when you drop it in the basement.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef. What do you call a cow with 3 legs? Lean beef. What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Your mom.
So I’m banging the f@ck out of this slutty chick, right? And I’m thinking to myself, “She’s PROBABLY got AIDS.” So I go and get myself tested and, lo-and-behold, I’m positive. This gets me thinking, “Where the f@ck does an eight year old get AIDS? !” “Who has my sister been hanging out with?!”
Why did Billy not like the soccer ball he got for Christmas?.. He has no legs…
yo mama so ugly she made happy meals cry
(Just a joke) when Stephen Hawking fell over and hurt his leg, his dad said " It’ll get better just walk it off."
WAIT! I remember how the joke goes! These two cannibals i hanging out eat lunch, which is a clown you see, cause there cannibals and one cannibal says to the other cannibal "Does this taste funny to you?
I remember my uncles last words: “I don’t think were going shooting today.”
When I saw a girl sitting on the ground crying When I asked her where her parents were, she cried louder That’s why I like to volunteer in an orphanage
What’s the hardest line to draw in a hospital? * … A FLATLINE!
They say I’ll mess up my insides, but I don’t have any.
I don’t call it suicide. I call it population control
are you sad then don’t be sad because sad backwards is das and das no good.
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