I have an auntie who has no arms and no legs. She is my dad’s half sister.
what do depressed people and Apple’s have in common? they both hang from trees
“Boom, quick; you have five seconds to give me three reasons to live.” “1…2…3 ……4…5…” Did you noticed you said nothing at all?
Wanna hear some famous last words? “We are just experiencing some turbulence”
what is the simularite with a sloth and a depresed kid they both hang from trees
Crucifixion - only one guy who nailed it… at least Jesus didn’t get screwed over, but I bet he was pretty cross about being forced to hang around.
Whats the difference between a baby and an onoin? The baby cries when I cut it but an onion makes me cry when I cut it.
WAIT! I remember how the joke goes! These two cannibals i hanging out eat lunch, which is a clown you see, cause there cannibals and one cannibal says to the other cannibal "Does this taste funny to you?
Orphan boy:Your dad is probably dissapointed of you i mean look at you Me: well at least my parents kept me wheres yours
Q:What was my son’s last words before he died. A:Bye dad i am going to school.
Life is like a penis simple,soft,relaxed,and hanging free.until a woman comes around and makes it hard
Paddy and Seamus work at the Guinness factory and Seamus has a horrible accident and dies at work. Paddy agrees to tell Seamuswife the bad news. He knocks on the door and Seamus wife answers. " Whats happened Paddy?" Paddy frowns. " Im sorry to say poor Seamus fell into the Guinness vat and drowned, im so sorry." She started to cry and asked paddy: " Did he at least die quickly? " Seamus shook his head, " No, he got out 3 times for a pee."
The more suicidal people there are the less suicidal people there are
Q: what happened when the depressed kid wanted to high five the tree? A: It left him/her/them hanging
Your legs are just like oreos! I wanna split the ends and eat whats in between.
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