A pirate walked into a bar with his ship’s steering wheel hanging off his pants. The bartender says, “Hey! What’s with the steering wheel?” The pirate says, “I don’t know but it’s driving me nuts! ” I got detention yesterday because I told the emo kid to “Hang in there.”
Wanna hear some famous last words? “We are just experiencing some turbulence”
I wanna be a Christmas decoration cause they always do be hanging
What do you call a woman with one leg? Eileen.
You know people always say your life is worth it, but with me it’s worth-it-less
What was stephan Hawkins last words\windows10shutting down
Why dose a milking stool have 3 legs? Because, the cow has the utter one.
Q:How do you make a door cry A:Twist it’s knob
Little Johnny’s sister Suzy sees her mom in the shower and asks what is that between your legs? Her mom responds, “That is my garage”. The next day Suzy sees her dad in the shower and says, “What is that between your legs?” Her dad answers, “It is a motorcycle that gets parked in mommy’s garage.” The next day Suzy came to dinner with blood all over her hands. Her mom asks, “Why is there blood all over your hands Suzy?” Suzy says, " Well… little Johnny tried to put his motorcycle in my garage so I ripped its wheels off."
Friend 1:Eyyy gurl Me:Hey! (Fake smile) Friend 2:hey g-guys what "bout we play would you rather? 6 hours later Friend 2:So (name) would u rather? 1.“Hang” out with me Or 2.“Jump” 1 times? Me…e-eh?..Why not both???we could just "Jump while “Hanging” out right?
you tell an orphan joke to an orphan you start laughing they start crying they say they are going to tell their mom then you start laughing harder
I’ll always remember my Dad’s last words before he died on 9/11… Allahu Akbar!
Depression is like therapy the more you see it the more you get used to it
Why Couldn’t the Japanese man give a high five? Because Logan Paul left him hanging.
Me: want to play 911 My little brother: what’s that Me: It’s where i kick your legs and you fall
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