Whats Big, bounces, and make little kids cry? my donation to the orphanage :)
I wish my hair was depressed Cause then it would cut itself
i will remember my brothers last words: if you cant put a fork in a toaster how about a spoon
A man is walking on the deck of a cruise ship, when he sees a woman, without arms and legs, crying. The man says “What’s wrong?” The woman says “I’ve never been hugged before.” So, the man gives her a hug and walks away. The next day, the man sees the woman, on the deck, crying again. The man says “What’s wrong, now?” The woman says “I’ve never been kissed before.” So, the man gives her a kiss and walks away. The next day, the same thing occurs. The man says “Oh, for Christ’s sake! What’s wrong, this time?!” The woman says “Well, I’ve never been f@cked before.” So, the man picks her up, throws her into the ocean, and yells “YOU’RE f@ckED!”
So I’m banging the f@ck out of this slutty chick, right? And I’m thinking to myself, “She’s PROBABLY got AIDS.” So I go and get myself tested and, lo-and-behold, I’m positive. This gets me thinking, “Where the f@ck does an eight year old get AIDS? !” “Who has my sister been hanging out with?!”
Why did the noble gas cry? Because all his friends Argon.
my grandpa’s last words were before died in vietnam was what f@ck did i step on…
What’s the difference between a coat hangerband an emo? Nothing that both hang
what’s the difference between an onion and a baby? nobody cries when you cut up the baby.
What does a cannibal and a spider have in common? Both eight legs
You know people always say your life is worth it, but with me it’s worth-it-less
Q:What was my son’s last words before he died. A:Bye dad i am going to school.
To the guy asking what joy I find in suicide jokes, the answer is simple. I make suicide jokes to cope with my crippling depression. Must be working, cause I’m still here
A emo texted a tree wanna hang out… The tree ghosted her
One day, he started crying out of nowhere. Everyone started crying with him. There was a crying pandemic going around.
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