Dark Humor

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my advice to suicidal people: just hang in there ??

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When you break up with your online girlfriend, and you hear your uncle crying in the other room.

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Me: Man I wish my clothes were emo. Friend:Why? Me:so they would hang themselves

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I cannot moderate myself at all. It’s either I don’t take my meds, or I take the entire bottle. Decisions decisions… Bleach solves so many problems, Staines, Dirty dishes, messes, and over population

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Why dose a milking stool have 3 legs? Because, the cow has the utter one.

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I started beating my washing machine beacause it wasn’t working, my wife started crying. Knock knock Who’s there Insomnia You’ll fit right in along with Depression and anxiety, you can help keep me awake at night because Depression is struggling with that… Well now I can "t cry myself to sleep anymore…

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I will always remember my uncle’s last words, “What’s The Shovel For?”

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