Dark Humor

if things dont get better the Christmas lights wont be the only thing hanging

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I will never forget my grandpa’s last words: Alahu-Akbar i will remember my aunties last word: if you shoot me you pen-s is small (gun shot)

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what do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn’t matter whutcha call him he ain’t comin’

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Why did Billy not like the soccer ball he got for Christmas?.. He has no legs…

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you tell an orphan joke to an orphan you start laughing they start crying they say they are going to tell their mom then you start laughing harder

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Q:What was my son’s last words before he died. A:Bye dad i am going to school.

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I remember grandpas last words “oh shit it’s in drive”

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To whoever stole my antidepressants I hope you are happy now

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whats the difference between a maze and a depressed life? one of them you can find a way out of

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I started beating my washing machine beacause it wasn’t working, my wife started crying. Knock knock Who’s there Insomnia You’ll fit right in along with Depression and anxiety, you can help keep me awake at night because Depression is struggling with that… Well now I can "t cry myself to sleep anymore…

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What do you call a cow with no legs Ground beef…haha…no one likes my jokes

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If I went to walmart, I would be able to scan my own wrists because they’re barcodes too.

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What has 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.

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The depressed kid at school tried giving the tree a high five It left him hanging

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What was Steven Hawking’s last words? The windows xp log out sound

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