Dark Humor

people talking me asking whats the worst day in the year for them. Person 1: The first day of school cause i don’t like going to school Person 2: Valentines day cause its to lovey Me: oh nice mines my birthday cause its when i was born

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I’ll never forget my bosses last words: " We shall serve the best meat in our burgers! "

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Brother: I bought my brother a trampoline today, the ungrateful f@ck just sat in his wheelchair and cried if your depressed and you crying like this joke

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Me, trying to interact with people: “Hey, are you a rope? Because I really wanna HANG with you” Person I’m talking to: Pulling out phone to call suicide hotline “haha what”

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What does an emo do on Halloween, they hang like a decoration

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When you break up with your online girlfriend, and you hear your uncle crying in the other room.

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Chuck Norris doesn’t turn on his shower, he just stares at it until it cries

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You can’t YEE your last H A W! but I put my BALLS in ur JAW.

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