according to all known laws of aviation, a bee should not be able to fly, it wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. but of course, bees fly anyway because bees don’t care about what humans think is impossible, Yellow, Black. Yellow, Black
Little Johnny’s mom is taking a shower little Johnny walks in and asks what is that in between your legs mommy says that is my keyhole the next day little Johnny sees his dad taking a shower and little Johnny asks what is that in between your legs daddy says that is my key the next day little Johnny says to his dad looks like the neighbor has the key to mommy’s keyhole too. By:Xzavier
Why was I stress eating on the train track? To wait to get hit.
life’s too short to want it.
Hey can’t wait to meet you! So join the crippiling depression family!!
me: have you ever went sky diving friend:No me:Well don’t it sucks friend:Why me:They gave me a parachute and I lived
Me and a person downtown. Person: Hey, crazy Saturday night. Me: I guess so. Person: Why do people do crazy stuff like this? Me: I don’t know. I used too, but don’t anymore. Person: why’d you stop? Me: unfortunately, I lived every time I’d try something.
Are you a toaster? Bc I want to take a bath w you ;)
What do suicidal people do in their spare time? Hang out.
My mom told me its not healthy to stay in my room all day…but the only places I’m allowed to go to are my room and downstairs.
My grandma just died from cancer My last words to her were “I like your cut g”
Last words of the captain of the Titanic… Where’s all this water come from??
I will always remember my grandpa’s last words. SHIT, THE LADDER IS FALLING!
Lets make a joke on how depressing monday is to ignore how depressing everyday is.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef. What do you call a cow with 3 legs? Lean beef. What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Your mom.
RUS | ENG