i remember my grandfathers last words: “is that loaded?”
What has two legs but can’t walk? Pants ??
When its been halloween for a few months but there’s still a body hanging from your neighbours tree
Me and my grandpa went on a road trip and he died that was the last thing we did together and I will never forget his last words “WAKE UP YOU DUMBASS”
I will always remember my grandpa’s last words. SHIT, THE LADDER IS FALLING!
Why does a milking stool only have 3 legs? – Because the cow has the udder.
Famous last words of my uncle: (a bomb disposal expert) yes the red wire
I am a failure to everyone and decided to attemp a suicide, guess what? I failed
Little Johnny is watching his dad shave one morning and his dad was making alot of mistakes. Suddenly his dad screams " bitches and asses!" Johnny asks what it meant and his dad replied " aunts and uncles" Oh. next thing he hears is “dicks and pussies!” Johnny asks " what’s that mean?" To which his dad replied " uh coats and hats." Oh next thing he know he sees his dad jumping around the the bathroom yelling " f@cking, f@ck,f@ck,f@ck" " what does that mean dad?" And his dad yells " cut Johnny, it means cut!!!" Oh. Next week is Thanksgiving and the doorbell rings and Johnny answers it and says " Hey bitches and asses, hang your dicks and pussies here, dad’s in the kitchen f@cking the turkey.
A girl and dog get dropped off at an orphanage why was she crying before she went in Because the people came back for their dog
Grandpa’s last words,why do you have a chain saw
whats the difference between onions and babys? i cry when i cut onions.
I’ll always remember my dads last words… Why do you have an axe we live in the city
Most people think an octopus has 8 legs. Actually, they have 6 legs and 2 arms. How can you tell which are the arms? Hit it on the head. The two that go up to the head when he says “Owwww” are his arms.
Famous last words: “Don’t worry man, it’s not even loaded.”
RUS | ENG
