what do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn’t matter whutcha call him he ain’t comin’
a man walks into a bar, and notices a steak hanging from the ceiling. when he asks the bartender about it, the bartender says “If you can jump up and hit it, drinks are on the house for the night, but if you miss, everyone’s drinks are on your tab for the next two hours. Do you want to try? ” the man decided not to take the risk. he thought the steaks where too high.
I still remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. He said, “Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?”
A pirate walked into a bar with his ship’s steering wheel hanging off his pants. The bartender says, “Hey! What’s with the steering wheel?” The pirate says, “I don’t know but it’s driving me nuts! ” I got detention yesterday because I told the emo kid to “Hang in there.”
When your sad don’t feel down about yourself break someone’s leg and laugh.
So I’m banging the f@ck out of this slutty chick, right? And I’m thinking to myself, “She’s PROBABLY got AIDS.” So I go and get myself tested and, lo-and-behold, I’m positive. This gets me thinking, “Where the f@ck does an eight year old get AIDS? !” “Who has my sister been hanging out with?!”
are you sad then don’t be sad because sad backwards is das and das no good.
U wanna hear a Suicide joke nvm it didn’t make it
whats the difference between a maze and a depressed life? one of them you can find a way out of
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves? Russel
To avoid getting drafted, a young man slips into a nunnery to hide from some draft board agents who are after him. Desperate, he approaches a nun and asks her to hide him. “Get under my robes,” says the nun. “No one will look for you there.” The nun lifts up her robes and the man says, “Hey, that’s a fine pair of legs you have there, sister.” “Yeah, well if you look a bit higher you’ll see a fine set of balls, ” replies the nun. “I didn’t want to get drafted either.”
i got in trouble in school for leaving the depressed kid hanging
I remember my grandfathers last words: Are you holding the ladder
What was Steven Hawking’s last words? The windows xp log out sound
My grandma just died from cancer My last words to her were “I like your cut g”
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