Dark Humor

friend: hey,wanna play hid and seek? me:sure, i’ve got a great spot! me: grabs nuce and runs to my closet

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Q: What did the drunk emo say to the bartender? A: Nothing! He was hung over. My sister thinks shes so smart, shes said onions are the only food that makes you cry So I threw a coconut at her

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you tell an orphan joke to an orphan you start laughing they start crying they say they are going to tell their mom then you start laughing harder

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The depressed kid went to high five the tree… but the tree left them hanging… Children are like a box of Christmas decorations. I keep ‘em in my basement until it’s time to hang ‘em from a tree.

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911 what’s your emergency Me, my grandma just passed out in the living room and I think she’s dead Well it’s not a living room any more Me, hangs up Whats worse than 1000 dead babies hanging off a tree? 1 dead baby hanging of 1000 trees

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There’s a man in Florida with no arms or legs who is armed and on the run

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I will never forget my grandfathers last words. “The f@ck you doing whit that knife

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What do you call a dog with no legs ? It doesn’t matter he isn’t coming to you.

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What do you call a person with no arms or legs at your front door? Mat

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Me: want to play 911 My little brother: what’s that Me: It’s where i kick your legs and you fall

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To whoever stole my antidepressants I hope you are happy now

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i will always remember my grandfather’s last words before he died: is that a real chainsaw?

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why arent emos n trees friends? cus the tree leaves them hanging

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Person: where do i commit sucide Dog: roof Person: good idea

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Being sad is my only happiness

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