Why does sumo wrestlers shave their legs? Because they don’t want to be mistaken as feminists
Orphan boy:Your dad is probably dissapointed of you i mean look at you Me: well at least my parents kept me wheres yours
a boy got a soccer ball and a bike for Christmas. Why is he sad? He doesn’t have legs
Famous last words: “Don’t worry man, it’s not even loaded.”
I walked into the kitchen and saw my wife chopping up onions which made me cry. Onions was a good dog.
A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He yelled, "Doctor! Doctor! I can’t feel my legs!" The Doctor replies, “I know, I amputated your arms.”
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef. What do you call a cow with 3 legs? Lean beef. What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Your mom.
i will never forget my mother and fathers last words WHERE THE SAM HELL DID YOU GET A GRANADE
What’s the difference between an emo and my clothes? my clothes don’t hang themselves.
I still remember my granpas last words: turn the lawn mower off!
What happened when the emo kid tried to high 5 a tree? It left him hanging
1.) What’s Yellow And Can’t Swim? A Bus Full Of Children 2.) Did you hear bout the pilsbury dough boy? he died of a yeast infection 3.) I will never forget my grandads last words… “you’re still holding the ladder right?” 4.) I have a fish that can breakdance… only for 20 seconds though, and only once 5.) give a man a match and he will be warm for a few hours… lite a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life
I will never forget my grandfathers last words. “The f@ck you doing whit that knife
They say Chuck Norris’s tears cure cancer, too bad he doesn’t cry
The depressed kid went to high five the tree… but the tree left them hanging… Children are like a box of Christmas decorations. I keep ‘em in my basement until it’s time to hang ‘em from a tree.
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