Dark Humor

I fear my last words will be ‘‘hold my beer and watch this.’’

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If you jump off a bridge while crying, it’s suicide, but if you jump off a bridge while screaming parquor it’s a failed stunt.

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All my jokes are cys for help INCLUDING THIS ONE

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I’ll Never Forget My Grandfathers Last Words “STOP SHAKING THE LADDER YOU LITTLE CUNT!”

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“I wasn’t that drunk yesterday.” “Oh boy you took the shower head in your arms and told it to stop crying.”

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I saw this little girl crying I asked her where her parents where she cried more man I love working at an orphanage

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What do you call a dog with no legs… My asian neighbors dinner. 

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Why did the Chinese woman hang up? Because she Wang the Wong number

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I’ll never forget my dad’s last words. “Erase my search history, son.”

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if you ever get mad at a person that cramppled their leg. don’t forget that they can hide but they cant run.

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A man walks into the library. “Hello ma’am I’d like to borrow a book about committing suicide” The librarian replies, “No,you won’t give it back”

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I will never forget my grandpa’s last words: Alahu-Akbar i will remember my aunties last word: if you shoot me you pen-s is small (gun shot)

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Me: Man I wish my clothes were emo. Friend:Why? Me:so they would hang themselves

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(Just a joke) when Stephen Hawking fell over and hurt his leg, his dad said " It’ll get better just walk it off."

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Other girls be like “I want a 6ft guy”, meanwhile I want to be 6ft under ????

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