Dark Humor

Why do we tell actors to “break a leg”? Because every scene has a cast!

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Life is like a box of chocolates, mostly dissapointing

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I saw a kid crying and i asked him where his parents were… Man i love working at a Orphanige

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You know people always say your life is worth it, but with me it’s worth-it-less

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Friend 1:Eyyy gurl Me:Hey! (Fake smile) Friend 2:hey g-guys what "bout we play would you rather? 6 hours later Friend 2:So (name) would u rather? 1.“Hang” out with me Or 2.“Jump” 1 times? Me…e-eh?..Why not both???we could just "Jump while “Hanging” out right?

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What do you call a cow with no legs Ground beef…haha…no one likes my jokes

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What do you call a man that has no arms, no legs and sits in front of your door? Mat.

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I remember my grandfathers last words: Are you holding the ladder

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I still remember my dad’s last words "don’t worry son, Allah will be pleased"

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Me, trying to interact with people: “Hey, are you a rope? Because I really wanna HANG with you” Person I’m talking to: Pulling out phone to call suicide hotline “haha what”

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I told the judge I thought she was unconscious before she woke up crying. The judge asked: why didn’t you drug her again so she would forget?

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are you sad then don’t be sad because sad backwards is das and das no good.

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What does a priest and a clown have in common? They both make children cry

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Are you a toaster? Bc I want to take a bath w you ;)

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A man is about to be hanged. His executioner asks for his last words. The man says: “Man, it’s hard to think of something when your life is on the line.”

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