Who needs April fools… When your whole life is a joke?
what does an apple and a lawyer have in common? they both look good hanging from a tree
you tell an orphan joke to an orphan you start laughing they start crying they say they are going to tell their mom then you start laughing harder
All my jokes are cys for help INCLUDING THIS ONE
“I bought my little sister a trampoline for her birthday but all she wants to do is sit in her wheelchair and cry”
Me: want to play 911 My little brother: what’s that Me: It’s where i kick your legs and you fall
Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms or legs. Knock Knock “Who’s there?” Not Susie.
I remember my dad’s last words “I met your father.”
according to all known laws of aviation, a bee should not be able to fly, it wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. but of course, bees fly anyway because bees don’t care about what humans think is impossible, Yellow, Black. Yellow, Black
Me having a good day Going on a walk on a peaceful day* my depression: hey whats up! Me: go away. My depression: well how rude. Me: ??. My depression: remeber that one tim… Me: no, dont even. My depression: that we… Me: nope. My deprssion: says really fast:said that one stupid joke that wasnt funny and everybody just stared at you, and then you spilt water all over yourself and it looked like you peed yourself. And you went home and cried yourself to sleep just like yoy do every single night. Me: ??????. My depression: ?? dont worry I’ll always be here for you.
What was Stephen Hawkins last words? System failure
what is the simularite with a sloth and a depresed kid they both hang from trees
if you ever get mad at a person that cramppled their leg. don’t forget that they can hide but they cant run.
So sad when the emo kid tried to give a high five to a tree To bad he left him hanging
To avoid getting drafted, a young man slips into a nunnery to hide from some draft board agents who are after him. Desperate, he approaches a nun and asks her to hide him. “Get under my robes,” says the nun. “No one will look for you there.” The nun lifts up her robes and the man says, “Hey, that’s a fine pair of legs you have there, sister.” “Yeah, well if you look a bit higher you’ll see a fine set of balls, ” replies the nun. “I didn’t want to get drafted either.”
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