Dark Humor

Famous last words of my uncle: (a bomb disposal expert) yes the red wire

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I told the judge I thought she was unconscious before she woke up crying. The judge asked: why didn’t you drug her again so she would forget?

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Any game: Are you a boy or a girl? Non-binary people: cries

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Q:What was my son’s last words before he died. A:Bye dad i am going to school.

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What do you call a pig with no legs? A groundhog.

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so if the reason people used to hang women because they were seen as witches back in the day, if boys were to be hung would they be called wizards?

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I remember grandpas last words “oh shit it’s in drive”

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Whats Big, bounces, and make little kids cry? my donation to the orphanage :)

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Q:How do you make a door cry A:Twist it’s knob

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What do you do after your girlfriend with two broken legs dumps you? Take her wheel chair, she’ll come crawling back.

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I’ll never forget my father’s last words… Oh f@ck, it’s a bus!

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To whoever stole my antidepressants I hope you are happy now

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What’s the similarity between a Christmas ornament and a person? They both hang…

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The more suicidal people there are the less suicidal people there are

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I saw a kid crying and i asked him where his parents were… Man i love working at a Orphanige

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