I’ll always remember my Dad’s last words before he died on 9/11… Allahu Akbar!
My girlfriends last words I can’t wait to become a mom
“Oh waiter! Waiter!” “Yes sir?” “Do you have frog’s legs?” “Why yes” “Good. Now hop along and get me a steak!”
This boy was in school one day when he became desparate to go to the bathroom. So he asked the teacher, “May I use the bathroom?” The teacher replied, “No, not unless you say your alphabet.” So the boy said “a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z.” When he finished, the teacher asked him, “Where’s the p?” The boy replied, “Half way down my leg…” i hear skeletons like to play the saxaBONE, though i think the tromBONE would be better, but tibia honest, both can be HUMERUS, wouldnt wanna hurt your funny bone, but i think your starting to get BONELY so ill stop pulling your leg. Now get out before i give you a bad time.
The Orphan started crying at school when he got suspended and had to go home
why don’t you see elephants hiding in trees? Bc they’re good at it.
what did the rope and the tree say to the kid do you want to hang later
Q: what happened when the depressed kid wanted to high five the tree? A: It left him/her/them hanging
If somebody cuts their leg off and hits you with it. Works they be kicking or hitting you?
Why does a milking stool only have 3 legs? – Because the cow has the udder.
A man is walking on the deck of a cruise ship, when he sees a woman, without arms and legs, crying. The man says “What’s wrong?” The woman says “I’ve never been hugged before.” So, the man gives her a hug and walks away. The next day, the man sees the woman, on the deck, crying again. The man says “What’s wrong, now?” The woman says “I’ve never been kissed before.” So, the man gives her a kiss and walks away. The next day, the same thing occurs. The man says “Oh, for Christ’s sake! What’s wrong, this time?!” The woman says “Well, I’ve never been f@cked before.” So, the man picks her up, throws her into the ocean, and yells “YOU’RE f@ckED!”
I will always remember my uncle’s last words, “What’s The Shovel For?”
what does an apple and a lawyer have in common? they both look good hanging from a tree
whats the difference between a maze and a depressed life? one of them you can find a way out of
Why do orphans cry at insurance places They got offered the family plan
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