what was my great grandpas last words SHIT MG42!!!
I will never forget my grandfathers last words. “The f@ck you doing whit that knife
My memes are ironic but my depression is chronic.
after a surgery, a man claimed he couldn’t feel his legs, i replied “OF COURSE NOT, I AMPUTATED YOUR f@ckING ARMS!”
I remember my grandfathers last words: Are you holding the ladder
A girl noticed hair growing between her legs and asked her mom about it. Her mom said it was her monkey and it grows hair.so she told her sister and her sister said that aint nothing mines already eating bananas
What was Stephen Hawkins last words? System failure
I told the judge I thought she was unconscious before she woke up crying. The judge asked: why didn’t you drug her again so she would forget?
what has two legs and is red all over? half a cat
if you ever get mad at a person that cramppled their leg. don’t forget that they can hide but they cant run.
To avoid getting drafted, a young man slips into a nunnery to hide from some draft board agents who are after him. Desperate, he approaches a nun and asks her to hide him. “Get under my robes,” says the nun. “No one will look for you there.” The nun lifts up her robes and the man says, “Hey, that’s a fine pair of legs you have there, sister.” “Yeah, well if you look a bit higher you’ll see a fine set of balls, ” replies the nun. “I didn’t want to get drafted either.”
If I went to walmart, I would be able to scan my own wrists because they’re barcodes too.
what do emos and the lorax have in common? they both hang with trees
To whoever stole my antidepressants I hope you are happy now
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef.
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