Dark Humor

What do you call a man off the ground? Hanged.

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Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms or legs. Knock Knock “Who’s there?” Not Susie.

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I tried to high five a tree, but it just left me hanging.

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according to all known laws of aviation, a bee should not be able to fly, it wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. but of course, bees fly anyway because bees don’t care about what humans think is impossible, Yellow, Black. Yellow, Black

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The depressed kid went to high five the tree… but the tree left them hanging… Children are like a box of Christmas decorations. I keep ‘em in my basement until it’s time to hang ‘em from a tree.

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Why did the turkey cross the road twice? To prove he wasn’t a chicken!

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What do you call a woman with one arm and one leg? Eileen Doctor approaches a patient in Hospital and says “I have some good news and bad news" so the patient says “What is the bad news?” the Doctor replies “I have had to amputate both your legs” so the patent says “Well what is the good news? ” the Doctor replies "I have found someone to buy your slippers”…

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i got in trouble in school for leaving the depressed kid hanging

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I still remember my dad’s last words "don’t worry son, Allah will be pleased"

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grandfathers last words :Stop shaking the ladder you cunt Grandmother last words : you know how to use that hammer Dads last words : Always aim before you shoot that gun Moms last words : Turn of the stove when you’re done My last thought : am I a murder

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Famous last words: “Don’t worry man, it’s not even loaded.”

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There’s nothing more depressing than a failed suicide attempt.

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What was Steven Hawking’s last words? The windows xp log out sound

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They say I’ll mess up my insides, but I don’t have any.

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So sad when the emo kid tried to give a high five to a tree To bad he left him hanging

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