Dark Humor

I don’t call it suicide. I call it population control

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A emo texted a tree wanna hang out… The tree ghosted her

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my grandpa died in 9/11 i was told his last words where Allahu Akbar

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I wish I could say that my life is a joke but I can’t because jokes have a meaning

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Me: Knock knock…Friend: who’s there? Me: I don’t know anymore

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A man is about to be hanged. His executioner asks for his last words. The man says: “Man, it’s hard to think of something when your life is on the line.”

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Why did the turkey cross the road twice? To prove he wasn’t a chicken!

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Friend #1: “Whats your favourite thing about trees?” Friend #2: “Apples” Me: “I can hang myself in them.”

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They say I’ll mess up my insides, but I don’t have any.

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Wanna hear somethin’ ironic? When one cutter tells another cutter to stop, but he himself can’t stop cutting.

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I fear my last words will be ‘‘hold my beer and watch this.’’

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What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef.

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Why was I stress eating on the train track? To wait to get hit.

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Whats the difference between a baby and an onoin? The baby cries when I cut it but an onion makes me cry when I cut it.

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What do you call a cow with no legs Ground beef…haha…no one likes my jokes

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