A man woke up from a serious surgery. He screamed, “Doctor! Doctor! I can’t feel my legs!”. And the doctor replied, “I know. I amputated you arms.”
Me: Knock knock…Friend: who’s there? Me: I don’t know anymore
What do you call a man off the ground? Hanged.
Are you depression "cause you’re always on my mind~ 1273 depression got the best of me, i’m gonna cry in my room now
I saw my friend hang themselves my response was i guess they wanted to hang with someone
A depressed boy went to high five a tree guess what the tree did? The tree left him hanging
I’ll always remember my father’s last words: I’m gonna sleep for a little.
Why do orphans cry at insurance places They got offered the family plan
why does a movie set say break a leg? because they have a CAST
I remember grandpas last words “oh shit it’s in drive”
where to people with no legs go to have fun? legno land
“Oh waiter! Waiter!” “Yes sir?” “Do you have frog’s legs?” “Why yes” “Good. Now hop along and get me a steak!”
Where does a girl with one leg work? IHOP.
What made me laugh? The fact that my life is a joke:")
A wife decided to leave for a vacation, leaving her husband in supervision of her mother and her cat. After a few days, she called her husband and asked, “How is everything going?” He responded with, “The cat is dead.” She cried out and said, “Why couldn’t you’ve broken the new slowly? You could have said the cat is playing on the roof or on the first day, and the next say it broke its leg, then the next that the poor things dead! Anyways, how’s my mom?” “She’s playing on the roof.”
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