Dark Humor

To the guy asking what joy I find in suicide jokes, the answer is simple. I make suicide jokes to cope with my crippling depression. Must be working, cause I’m still here

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I don"t think I’m allergic to this

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Orphans are the best targets for bullying, since who they gonna cry too? their parents?

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If I went to walmart, I would be able to scan my own wrists because they’re barcodes too.

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The last words my Dad spoke before he passed was, “Honey put down the knife we were only talking about getting a divorce.”

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What has four legs and one arm? A rottweiler at a park. What do you say to a 1 legged hitch hiker? Hop in!

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are you a rope? bc i wanna hang with you

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Famous last words: I COULD EAT THIS IN ONE BITE!

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What do you call a cow that has two legs shorter on one side of its body compared to the other? LEAN BEEF!

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What do you call a smurf with no arms or legs? A paintball

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When you break up with your online girlfriend, and you hear your uncle crying in the other room.

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What’s a similarity Cliff Hanger and Nooses? They both leave you Hanging

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Who needs April fools… When your whole life is a joke?

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Me: Knock knock…Friend: who’s there? Me: I don’t know anymore

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Me: Calls 9-1-1 Operator: 9/11 what’s your emergency? Me: hangs up

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