i remember my grandfathers last words: “is that loaded?”
Any game: Are you a boy or a girl? Non-binary people: cries
What does my head and hell have in common? They both have demons in them
I wanna be a Christmas decoration cause they always do be hanging
The best night of my life was when gave my virginity to wife and her last word was when she called me “Mommy” at the top of her lungs before I knocked her up ??.
I’ll never forget my sister’s last word. “Is it edible?”
my advice to suicidal people: just hang in there ??
I’ll always remember my Dad’s last words before he died on 9/11… Allahu Akbar!
How do you make a builder cry? Kill his family
what do emos and the lorax have in common? they both hang with trees
Why dose a milking stool have 3 legs? Because, the cow has the utter one.
“I always like walking in the rain, so no one can see me crying.” -Charlie Chaplin
Person: where do i commit sucide Dog: roof Person: good idea
Little Johnny is watching his dad shave one morning and his dad was making alot of mistakes. Suddenly his dad screams " bitches and asses!" Johnny asks what it meant and his dad replied " aunts and uncles" Oh. next thing he hears is “dicks and pussies!” Johnny asks " what’s that mean?" To which his dad replied " uh coats and hats." Oh next thing he know he sees his dad jumping around the the bathroom yelling " f@cking, f@ck,f@ck,f@ck" " what does that mean dad?" And his dad yells " cut Johnny, it means cut!!!" Oh. Next week is Thanksgiving and the doorbell rings and Johnny answers it and says " Hey bitches and asses, hang your dicks and pussies here, dad’s in the kitchen f@cking the turkey.
i went to a butcher house with my little cousin and seen a baby pig and told her look its pepa pig she started crying
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