Why are washers better than babies? Washers don’t cry when you put a load in it.
if you slit your wrist while crying in pain, that’s self-harm. If you slit your wrist but have no expression, that’s acting. it isn’t any of those if it’s suicide.
3 men walk into heaven at the same time. they all live in the same city. god asks the first man “how did you die?” the man says “I have a heart condition and iv’e been suspecting my wife of cheating for some time. anyway I get how from work and I see my wife on the bed and a man hang of the balcony. I get so mad and stomp on the guys fingers! he falls into a bush so I throw a refrigerator on him.” God asks the next man “how did you die?” the man says I was cleaning the windows and then this crazy man starts stomping on my fingers! luckily I fall safely in a bush! but then a refrigerator falls on me! " god asks the third man he says" I was the one in the fridge!"
911 what’s your emergency Me, my grandma just passed out in the living room and I think she’s dead Well it’s not a living room any more Me, hangs up Whats worse than 1000 dead babies hanging off a tree? 1 dead baby hanging of 1000 trees
The only time you see a depressed person lifted up - when they hang themselves.
When I saw a girl sitting on the ground crying When I asked her where her parents were, she cried louder That’s why I like to volunteer in an orphanage
What was Stephens hawking last words? I’m lagging
my sons so ungrateful. i bought him a trampoline and all he does is sit in his wheelchair and cry all day.
Brian has a crush on a cute girl Sally from school so he goes and tells his dad about her and he says sorry son you cant like her she is your sister. So Brian is okay with it and he starts to like another girl Madison and he goes up to his dad and says I have a crush on this girl Madison and again the dad goes oh sorry son you cant like any girl in school they are all your sisters so he goes crying to his mom and says dad said I cant like any girl because they are all my sisters and the mom goes oh it’s okay you can like any girl you want because he is not your dad.
How many emos does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None they just sit in the dark and cry.
What was Steven Hawking’s last words? The windows xp log out sound
What’s the difference between a man and a table. The table doesn’t cry when I break it’s legs
friend: hey,wanna play hid and seek? me:sure, i’ve got a great spot! me: grabs nuce and runs to my closet
I know Im valuable, I come with a barcode ;)
i remember my moms last words before her divorce, did you just load in me.
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