Dark Humor

Kid: hey dad whats dark humor ? Dad: go walk up to that homeless guy and throw a rock at him . Kid: but dad I dont have any legs or arms . Dad: exactly son.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

whats the difference between onions and babys? i cry when i cut onions.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

Once there was a girl named Sally! She had no arms or legs, was mute, deaf, and blind Knock knock Who’s there? Not sally

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Brian has a crush on a cute girl Sally from school so he goes and tells his dad about her and he says sorry son you cant like her she is your sister. So Brian is okay with it and he starts to like another girl Madison and he goes up to his dad and says I have a crush on this girl Madison and again the dad goes oh sorry son you cant like any girl in school they are all your sisters so he goes crying to his mom and says dad said I cant like any girl because they are all my sisters and the mom goes oh it’s okay you can like any girl you want because he is not your dad.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Crucifixion - only one guy who nailed it… at least Jesus didn’t get screwed over, but I bet he was pretty cross about being forced to hang around.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What’s the difference between a onion and a viola? No one cries when they cut up the viola

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Lets make a joke on how depressing monday is to ignore how depressing everyday is.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

why do we tell actors to break a leg … so they can get in the cast!

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

What do emos and apples have in common? They both hang on trees.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What does PEMDAS stand for? Please End My Depression And Suffering

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I was crying when Sasha died in AOT, i also got jealous.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I can’t hang out with a emo when they are sad? Why? Because it cuts deeply

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

A man walks into a bar. Sits down and asks the bartender for 12 shots of vodka. The bartender asks what the man is celebrating for and said he’ll give one shot on the house. The man said I celebrating my first blowjob. And nah if 12 shots doesn’t get the taste out of my mouth nothing will.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I was speaking at my grandpa’s funeral and I told everybody his last words: “You still holding the latter?”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

My mom told me its not healthy to stay in my room all day…but the only places I’m allowed to go to are my room and downstairs.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
- up - << N E X T! >> random

© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2026