Me: Mom I’m tired Mom:then go to sleep Me: No you don’t understand-
Yo mamma is so ugly she made blind kids cry
How do you get a depressed person out of a tree? You cut the rope…
Why did the sea cry ? Because it felt salty and blue
I don"t think I’m allergic to this
Q: What did the drunk emo say to the bartender? A: Nothing! He was hung over. My sister thinks shes so smart, shes said onions are the only food that makes you cry So I threw a coconut at her
I will always remember my uncle’s last words, “What’s The Shovel For?”
I still remember my grandpas last words Stop shaking the damn ladder
You must be depression, because you make me want to kill myself ;)
What’s the difference between a coat hangerband an emo? Nothing that both hang
To avoid getting drafted, a young man slips into a nunnery to hide from some draft board agents who are after him. Desperate, he approaches a nun and asks her to hide him. “Get under my robes,” says the nun. “No one will look for you there.” The nun lifts up her robes and the man says, “Hey, that’s a fine pair of legs you have there, sister.” “Yeah, well if you look a bit higher you’ll see a fine set of balls, ” replies the nun. “I didn’t want to get drafted either.”
I wont ever Forget my dads last words: “OH GOD THE POLICE!!!”
Why does a milking stool only have 3 legs? – Because the cow has the udder.
Why dose a milking stool have 3 legs? Because, the cow has the utter one.
What has 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
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