I was crying at school telling my friends my grandpa died, And they asked me what his last words were. His last words were “Are you still holding the ladder?”
I will never forget my grandfathers last words. “The f@ck you doing whit that knife
Teacher : Who here has thought about committing suicide? Half of the class : raises hand Teacher : … The half of the class: Starts talking about how they were thinking of doing it
I saw my friend hang themselves my response was i guess they wanted to hang with someone
A girl noticed hair growing between her legs and asked her mom about it. Her mom said it was her monkey and it grows hair.so she told her sister and her sister said that aint nothing mines already eating bananas
Why is sex like math? You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.
Person A: cmon person B, just be happy, smile Person B: over my dead body Person B: gets the noose
i will never forget my little brothers last word rip. his last words: paint dosent taste good
Q: What did one emo kid say to the other emo kid? A: Wanna hang out?
Why do trees never call emo kids? The emos always hang up on them.
I told the judge I thought she was unconscious before she woke up crying. The judge asked: why didn’t you drug her again so she would forget?
When you realize you have depression and depression realize how stupid you were
I’m going to hang myself in the bathroom at school and put a note telling kids that I’m a pinata
When you break up with your online girlfriend, and you hear your uncle crying in the other room.
Knock Knock! Who’s their? It’s Dave! Dave Who? *Dave proceeds to break down crying at the realization that his grandmother’s Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.
RUS | ENG
