whats the difference between a maze and a depressed life? one of them you can find a way out of
whats the difference between onions and babys? i cry when i cut onions.
What do you do after your girlfriend with two broken legs dumps you? Take her wheel chair, she’ll come crawling back.
if you slit your wrist while crying in pain, that’s self-harm. If you slit your wrist but have no expression, that’s acting. it isn’t any of those if it’s suicide.
what do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn’t matter whutcha call him he ain’t comin’
Why dose a milking stool have 3 legs? Because, the cow has the utter one.
I was speaking at my grandpa’s funeral and I told everybody his last words: “You still holding the latter?”
so if the reason people used to hang women because they were seen as witches back in the day, if boys were to be hung would they be called wizards?
I wont ever Forget my dads last words: “OH GOD THE POLICE!!!”
A depressed kid was stuck on a tree, and a man saw the kid Man: Hang in there! Im gonna get some help! Two minutes later, the kid literally did what the guy said
The only time you see a depressed person lifted up - when they hang themselves.
What Do You Say To A One Legged Hitch Hiker Hop In
Stephen hawkings last words were the windows closing sound
What has 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
A teacher was teaching her second-grade class about the government, so for homework that one day, she told her students to ask their parents what the government is. When Little Johnny got home that day, he went up to his dad and ask him what the government was. His dad thought for a while and answered, “Look at it this way: I’m the president, your mom is Congress, your maid is the workforce, you are the people and your baby brother is the future.’’ “I still don’t get it” responded the Little Johnny. “Why don’t you sleep on it then? Maybe you’ll understand it better,” said the dad. “Okay then…good night” said Little Jonny went off to bed. In the middle of the night, Little Johnny was awakened by his baby brother’s crying. He went to his baby brother’s crib and found that his baby brother had taken a crap in his diaper. So Little Johnny went to his parent’s room to get help. When he got to his parent’s bedroom, he looked through the keyhole to check if his parents were asleep. Through the keyhole, he saw his mom loudly snoring, but his dad wasn’t there. So he went to the maid’s room. When he looked through the maid’s room keyhole, he saw his dad having sex with his maid. Little Johnny was surprised, but then he just realized something and thinks aloud, ‘‘OH!! Now I understand the government! The President is screwing the workforce, Congress is fast asleep, nobody cares about the people, and the future is full of s**t!’’
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