Dark Humor

Yes I’m CUTE C-ringe U-gly T-errible E-mpty

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Me: Calls 9-1-1 Operator: 9/11 what’s your emergency? Me: hangs up

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef. What do you call a cow with 3 legs? Lean beef. What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Your mom.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What is the difference between a sloth and a depressed kid? A sloth doesn’t need a rope to hang

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why does sumo wrestlers shave their legs? Because they don’t want to be mistaken as feminists

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

If somebody cuts their leg off and hits you with it. Works they be kicking or hitting you?

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Whats the difference batween an onion and a baby. One makes you cry when you cut it up

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Yo mama is so ugly, her portraits hang themselves.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

I’ll never forget my brother’s last words: “Why is there a revolver in your hand?”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What made me laugh? The fact that my life is a joke:")

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What’s the difference between a baby and an onion ? One cries when you peel its skin off, the other makes you cry when you peel its skin off.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Me, trying to interact with people: “Hey, are you a rope? Because I really wanna HANG with you” Person I’m talking to: Pulling out phone to call suicide hotline “haha what”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Therapist: So how depressed would you say you’ve been feeling lately? Me: I don’t care anymore if my foot hangs over the bed where a monster can get it Therapist [whispering]: Jesus, wow

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

To whoever stole my antidepressants I hope you are happy now

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why did Logan Paul go to the suicide forest? to see who’s hanging around.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
- up - << N E X T! >> random

© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2026