I was speaking at my grandpa’s funeral and I told everybody his last words: “You still holding the latter?”
Whats Big, bounces, and make little kids cry? my donation to the orphanage :)
What do you call when a friend calm his suicidal friend? Hang in there buddy
If you drop an emo and a piece of paper from a tree which will hit the ground first? The piece of oaper because the rope will stop the emo
One night a girl said to her family "Goodnight Mommy, Goodnight Daddy, Goodnight Grandma, Goodbye Grandpa. the next morning her grandpa died. That night she said "Goodnight mommy, Goodnight daddy, Goodbye Grandma. the next morning the grandma died. The dad started to fear for his life because he was next. That night the girl said "Goodnight mommy, Goodbye daddy. the next morning the dad woke up and he was perfectly fine but when he went into the kitchen he saw his wife crying. when he asked her whats wrong she said “The Mail Man died”.
An Emo girl walks up to a tree to give it a high five… the tree left her hanging
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef. What do you call a cow with 3 legs? Lean beef. What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Your mom.
my sons so ungrateful. i bought him a trampoline and all he does is sit in his wheelchair and cry all day.
Ill never forget my mother last words. What’s are doing with that sledge hammer i will never forget my girlfriends last words…"get off of me STOP"slurp…Dead
What does PEMDAS stand for? Please End My Depression And Suffering
I cannot moderate myself at all. It’s either I don’t take my meds, or I take the entire bottle. Decisions decisions… Bleach solves so many problems, Staines, Dirty dishes, messes, and over population
why does a movie set say break a leg? because they have a CAST
Person A: cmon person B, just be happy, smile Person B: over my dead body Person B: gets the noose
Wanna hear some famous last words? “We are just experiencing some turbulence”
Lets make a joke on how depressing monday is to ignore how depressing everyday is.
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