Person: where do i commit sucide Dog: roof Person: good idea
Snow everywhere, it’s Christmas time. A person looks at the tree. The person: Only last thing left to hang! He grabs a noose.
Lets make a joke on how depressing monday is to ignore how depressing everyday is.
Famous last words of my uncle: (a bomb disposal expert) yes the red wire
My life Tell me when you get it
What has 4 legs and 1 arm? A Doberman in a playground.
I’ll always remember my Dad’s last words before he died on 9/11… Allahu Akbar!
What does my head and hell have in common? They both have demons in them
Q:What did one koala say to the other? A:Hows it hanging.??
Why were the cherries ?? crying? Because their parents were in a jam.
i went to a butcher house with my little cousin and seen a baby pig and told her look its pepa pig she started crying
Why is sex like math? You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.
Little Johnny’s mom is taking a shower little Johnny walks in and asks what is that in between your legs mommy says that is my keyhole the next day little Johnny sees his dad taking a shower and little Johnny asks what is that in between your legs daddy says that is my key the next day little Johnny says to his dad looks like the neighbor has the key to mommy’s keyhole too. By:Xzavier
What is the difference between a sloth and a depressed kid? A sloth doesn’t need a rope to hang
Me and a person downtown. Person: Hey, crazy Saturday night. Me: I guess so. Person: Why do people do crazy stuff like this? Me: I don’t know. I used too, but don’t anymore. Person: why’d you stop? Me: unfortunately, I lived every time I’d try something.
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