what’s the difference between an onion and a baby? nobody cries when you cut up the baby.
How do you make a builder cry? Kill his family
I still remember my grandpas last words Stop shaking the damn ladder
Life is like a box of chocolates, mostly dissapointing
Yo mama is so ugly, her portraits hang themselves.
Once there was a girl named Sally! She had no arms or legs, was mute, deaf, and blind Knock knock Who’s there? Not sally
There’s nothing more depressing than a failed suicide attempt.
911 what’s your emergency Me, my grandma just passed out in the living room and I think she’s dead Well it’s not a living room any more Me, hangs up Whats worse than 1000 dead babies hanging off a tree? 1 dead baby hanging of 1000 trees
i will always remember my grandfather’s last words before he died: is that a real chainsaw?
This man got his left arm and left leg cut off and someone asked him “How are You?” And he said “I’m all right now.”
what do emos and the lorax have in common? they both hang with trees
A wife decided to leave for a vacation, leaving her husband in supervision of her mother and her cat. After a few days, she called her husband and asked, “How is everything going?” He responded with, “The cat is dead.” She cried out and said, “Why couldn’t you’ve broken the new slowly? You could have said the cat is playing on the roof or on the first day, and the next say it broke its leg, then the next that the poor things dead! Anyways, how’s my mom?” “She’s playing on the roof.”
My memes are ironic but my depression is chronic.
Q:What was my son’s last words before he died. A:Bye dad i am going to school.
i will always remember my grandfathers last words “ill just check if its poisonous”.
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