Dark Humor

Whats the difference between a baby and an onoin? The baby cries when I cut it but an onion makes me cry when I cut it.

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I’m like a broken refrigerator, cool but broken inside

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Little Johnny’s sister Suzy sees her mom in the shower and asks what is that between your legs? Her mom responds, “That is my garage”. The next day Suzy sees her dad in the shower and says, “What is that between your legs?” Her dad answers, “It is a motorcycle that gets parked in mommy’s garage.” The next day Suzy came to dinner with blood all over her hands. Her mom asks, “Why is there blood all over your hands Suzy?” Suzy says, " Well… little Johnny tried to put his motorcycle in my garage so I ripped its wheels off."

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My dad, unfortunately, passed away when we couldn’t remember his blood type… His last words to us were, “Be positive!”

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Why are washers better than babies? Washers don’t cry when you put a load in it.

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Friend #1: “Whats your favourite thing about trees?” Friend #2: “Apples” Me: “I can hang myself in them.”

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Me: Wanna play 9/11? Friend: What’s that? Me: Its a game where I kick you in both legs and watch you fall.

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why don’t emos live alone?they like to hang with their freinds.

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Why dose a milking stool have 3 legs? Because, the cow has the utter one.

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