What do you call a cow that has two legs shorter on one side of its body compared to the other? LEAN BEEF!
what did the rope and the tree say to the kid do you want to hang later
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves? Russel
Whats the benefit of taking a depressed kid to the store Scan the wrist and you might get a discount
A blonde girl walks into a gym and sees a guy. The guy takes off his shirt she says “Oh what chest!” " That’s 100 lbs of dynamite, baby." Then he takes off his pants she says “Oh what legs!’’ He says “That 100 lbs of dynamite, baby.” After that, he took off his underwear. The blonde girl starts running he catches her and says “Why were you running? ” She said I didn’t wanna be in there once I’ve seen how small the fuse was.”
I wish i could be as visible as my depression is. My future is so bright, i need a flashlight to see where i’m going
When your sad don’t feel down about yourself break someone’s leg and laugh.
The best night of my life was when gave my virginity to wife and her last word was when she called me “Mommy” at the top of her lungs before I knocked her up ??.
why did the depressed person cross the road. to get ran over.
my advice to suicidal people: just hang in there ??
Me and my grandpa went on a road trip and he died that was the last thing we did together and I will never forget his last words “WAKE UP YOU DUMBASS”
What do you call a prostitute with no arm or legs Cash and carry
Friend #1: “Yo guys, what’s the most unfair game you’ve ever played? For me it’s Fortnite.” Friend #2: “I’d have to say Monopoly.” Me: “The most unfair game you say? Life, definitely. Like, no one wins, it’s a one-way game.” Friend #2: “Uhh…that’s not exactly what he meant…” Friend #1: calls the suicide hotline
Watches sad movie with family Everyone else: Crying Sister: How aren’t you crying? Me: I have no tear left to cry…
To whoever has my voodoo doll, please hold its hand.
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