I remember grandpas last words “oh shit it’s in drive”
What’s the difference between a coat hangerband an emo? Nothing that both hang
A man is about to be hanged. His executioner asks for his last words. The man says: “Man, it’s hard to think of something when your life is on the line.”
What did the rope say to me? “hey there man, you wanna hang later?”
I don"t think I’m allergic to this
why don’t you see elephants hiding in trees? Bc they’re good at it.
Why do orphans cry at insurance places They got offered the family plan
An orphan, an emo, and an apple are on a tree. The apples get picked unlike the orphan, while the emo kid is already dead from hanging.
i will always remember my grandfathers last words “ill just check if its poisonous”.
I’m going to hang myself in the bathroom at school and put a note telling kids that I’m a pinata
To the guy asking what joy I find in suicide jokes, the answer is simple. I make suicide jokes to cope with my crippling depression. Must be working, cause I’m still here
What do you call a guy with no arms and legs, at you front door? Matt
To avoid getting drafted, a young man slips into a nunnery to hide from some draft board agents who are after him. Desperate, he approaches a nun and asks her to hide him. “Get under my robes,” says the nun. “No one will look for you there.” The nun lifts up her robes and the man says, “Hey, that’s a fine pair of legs you have there, sister.” “Yeah, well if you look a bit higher you’ll see a fine set of balls, ” replies the nun. “I didn’t want to get drafted either.”
my grandpa died in 9/11 i was told his last words where Allahu Akbar
Teacher : Who here has thought about committing suicide? Half of the class : raises hand Teacher : … The half of the class: Starts talking about how they were thinking of doing it
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