Dark Humor

“I always like walking in the rain, so no one can see me crying.” -Charlie Chaplin

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You’d think my son would be happy that Daddy bought him a new bike. But no… oh no he just sits in his wheelchair and cries like a little girl.

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Father : “That’s great son. Who is she?” Son: “It’s Tina, the neighbor’s daughter”. Father : “Ohhh I wish you hadn’t said that.I have to tell u something son, but you must promise not to tell your mother.Tina is actually your sister.” The boy is naturally bummed out, but a couple of months later Son : “Daddy, I fell in love again and she is even hotter!” Father : “That’s great son. Who is she?” Son: “It’s Peny, the other neighbor’s daughter.” Father : “Ohhhh I wish you hadn’t said that. Peny is also your sister.” This went on couple of times and the son was so mad,he went straight to his mother crying. Son : “Mum I am so mad at dad ! I fell in love with six girls but I can’t date any of them because daddy is their father!” The mother hugs him affectionately and says: “My love, you can date whoever you want. Don’t listen to him. He is not your Father.”!!!

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What is the difference between a washing machine and a child…? The washing machine doesn’t cry when you put a load in it.

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Me and a person downtown. Person: Hey, crazy Saturday night. Me: I guess so. Person: Why do people do crazy stuff like this? Me: I don’t know. I used too, but don’t anymore. Person: why’d you stop? Me: unfortunately, I lived every time I’d try something.

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What is the difference between a Old Chest and a kid? One doesn’t cry when you drop it in the basement.

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Why did the turkey cross the road twice? To prove he wasn’t a chicken!

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what do you call a dog with no legs? It don’t matter what you call it. It ain’t coming.

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One day, he started crying out of nowhere. Everyone started crying with him. There was a crying pandemic going around.

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