Dark Humor

1.) What’s Yellow And Can’t Swim? A Bus Full Of Children 2.) Did you hear bout the pilsbury dough boy? he died of a yeast infection 3.) I will never forget my grandads last words… “you’re still holding the ladder right?” 4.) I have a fish that can breakdance… only for 20 seconds though, and only once 5.) give a man a match and he will be warm for a few hours… lite a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What’s the difference between an emo and my clothes? my clothes don’t hang themselves.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2


Brother: I bought my brother a trampoline today, the ungrateful f@ck just sat in his wheelchair and cried if your depressed and you crying like this joke

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

A man in a wheelchair and his friend were walking down the street Man in Wheelchair: * falls out of wheelchair* Friend: Are you okay? Man in Wheelchair: I can’t feel my legs

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What do emos and apples have in common? They both hang on trees.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2


-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Most people think an octopus has 8 legs. Actually, they have 6 legs and 2 arms. How can you tell which are the arms? Hit it on the head. The two that go up to the head when he says “Owwww” are his arms.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Paddy and Seamus work at the Guinness factory and Seamus has a horrible accident and dies at work. Paddy agrees to tell Seamuswife the bad news. He knocks on the door and Seamus wife answers. " Whats happened Paddy?" Paddy frowns. " Im sorry to say poor Seamus fell into the Guinness vat and drowned, im so sorry." She started to cry and asked paddy: " Did he at least die quickly? " Seamus shook his head, " No, he got out 3 times for a pee."

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Last word of mayor of Hiroshima: ‘what the f@ck was that noise?’ What where Stephens last words “battery low”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I remember my uncles last words: “I don’t think were going shooting today.”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *


© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2026