The last words my Dad spoke before he passed was, “Honey put down the knife we were only talking about getting a divorce.”
911 what’s your emergency Me, my grandma just passed out in the living room and I think she’s dead Well it’s not a living room any more Me, hangs up Whats worse than 1000 dead babies hanging off a tree? 1 dead baby hanging of 1000 trees
The more suicidal people there are the less suicidal people there are
I tried to high five a tree, but it just left me hanging.
knock knock whos their boo boo who well you dont have to cry about it gary
What do you say to your sister when she’s crying? – “Are you having a crisis?”
Why couldn’t the emo kid hang himself? After eating through his feelings the belt wouldn’t fit around his neck
A pirate walked into a bar with his ship’s steering wheel hanging off his pants. The bartender says, “Hey! What’s with the steering wheel?” The pirate says, “I don’t know but it’s driving me nuts! ” I got detention yesterday because I told the emo kid to “Hang in there.”
Chuck Norris doesn’t turn on his shower, he just stares at it until it cries
A man walks to the window and opens it and pulls out his phone and takes a photo. “One more picture and I’ll jump.” He takes another photo and shuts the window. “I can’t jump, you’re not supposed to throw trash out the window.”
what do emos and the lorax have in common? they both hang with trees
Why Couldn’t the Japanese man give a high five? Because Logan Paul left him hanging.
what do depressed people and Apple’s have in common? they both hang from trees
if you ever get mad at a person that cramppled their leg. don’t forget that they can hide but they cant run.
Last words of the captain of the Titanic… Where’s all this water come from??
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