There were three people on the third floor of a building the first one took a bite of a apple then said it was too hard so he threw it out the window the second person took a bite of a lemon he said it was too sour so he threw it out the window the third guy was drunk, he took a bite of a grenade and thought it was to crunchy so he threw it out the window then one of them went downstairs he saw a dog laying on the ground dead the apple had hit the dog in the head then there was a little girl crying with her cat in her lap it had died because the lemon fell out the window and hit it in the head next there was a old guy laughing i asked him why he was laugh he said “i farted and the building behind me blew up”.
Q: what happened when the depressed kid wanted to high five the tree? A: It left him/her/them hanging
Q:What was my son’s last words before he died. A:Bye dad i am going to school.
my advice to suicidal people: just hang in there ??
What do you call a person with no arms or legs at your front door? Mat
why arent emos n trees friends? cus the tree leaves them hanging
They say string theory is hanging on by a thread.
I was crying at school telling my friends my grandpa died, And they asked me what his last words were. His last words were “Are you still holding the ladder?”
Paddy and Seamus work at the Guinness factory and Seamus has a horrible accident and dies at work. Paddy agrees to tell Seamuswife the bad news. He knocks on the door and Seamus wife answers. " Whats happened Paddy?" Paddy frowns. " Im sorry to say poor Seamus fell into the Guinness vat and drowned, im so sorry." She started to cry and asked paddy: " Did he at least die quickly? " Seamus shook his head, " No, he got out 3 times for a pee."
Why couldn’t the emo kid hang himself? After eating through his feelings the belt wouldn’t fit around his neck
What do you call a sheep with no legs? A cloud
What do you call a dog with no legs… My asian neighbors dinner.
Being sad is my only happiness
What’s the difference between a onion and a viola? No one cries when they cut up the viola
How do you make a builder cry? Kill his family
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