What’s a similarity Cliff Hanger and Nooses? They both leave you Hanging
I can measure the speed of an object. Because I want to km/s
I will always remember my grandpa’s last words. SHIT, THE LADDER IS FALLING!
What do you call a Chinese man with one leg? Tie won shu
You can’t YEE your last H A W! but I put my BALLS in ur JAW.
I still remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. He said, “Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?”
I love Brussel sprouts more than I love myself
A girl noticed hair growing between her legs and asked her mom about it. Her mom said it was her monkey and it grows hair.so she told her sister and her sister said that aint nothing mines already eating bananas
yo mama so ugly she made happy meals cry
Teacher : Who here has thought about committing suicide? Half of the class : raises hand Teacher : … The half of the class: Starts talking about how they were thinking of doing it
Why do orphans cry at insurance places They got offered the family plan
What’s under the bottom? Your legs.
A man walks into a bar. Sits down and asks the bartender for 12 shots of vodka. The bartender asks what the man is celebrating for and said he’ll give one shot on the house. The man said I celebrating my first blowjob. And nah if 12 shots doesn’t get the taste out of my mouth nothing will.
What’s the difference between an emo and my clothes? my clothes don’t hang themselves.
my grandpa’s last words were before died in vietnam was what f@ck did i step on…
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