Why can’t depressed people leave the maze? Because their lives are the walls and they are to scared to meet the exit.
Little Jonny walks in on his parents having sex. He asks what their doing and the father says: “Well…We’re making you a brother.” So little Jonny runs off to let his parents finish, happy that he’s going to have a brother soon. The next day when little Jonny’s father comes come Jonny is crying out on the driveway. The father sits down next to Jonny and asks what’s wrong. Jonny cries: “I won’t have a baby brother!” HIs father is confused. “What do you mean?” He asks. “Because the mailman came by today and ate him!”
what do emos and the lorax have in common? they both hang with trees
A depressed kid was stuck on a tree, and a man saw the kid Man: Hang in there! Im gonna get some help! Two minutes later, the kid literally did what the guy said
I wanna be a Christmas decoration cause they always do be hanging
What’s the hardest line to draw in a hospital? * … A FLATLINE!
What’s the difference between a baby and an onion ? One cries when you peel its skin off, the other makes you cry when you peel its skin off.
You’d think my son would be happy that Daddy bought him a new bike. But no… oh no he just sits in his wheelchair and cries like a little girl.
What do you say to your sister when she’s crying? – “Are you having a crisis?”
Last word of mayor of Hiroshima: ‘what the f@ck was that noise?’ What where Stephens last words “battery low”
Why was I stress eating on the train track? To wait to get hit.
My dad, unfortunately, passed away when we couldn’t remember his blood type… His last words to us were, “Be positive!”
An Emo girl walks up to a tree to give it a high five… the tree left her hanging
where do you find a dog with no arms or legs -where you left it
My grandad broke his legs. To cheer him up i bought him a walkman
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