I could never forget my grandfathers last words. “Stop shaking the ladd-”
A wife decided to leave for a vacation, leaving her husband in supervision of her mother and her cat. After a few days, she called her husband and asked, “How is everything going?” He responded with, “The cat is dead.” She cried out and said, “Why couldn’t you’ve broken the new slowly? You could have said the cat is playing on the roof or on the first day, and the next say it broke its leg, then the next that the poor things dead! Anyways, how’s my mom?” “She’s playing on the roof.”
what’s the difference between an onion and a baby? nobody cries when you cut up the baby.
Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms or legs. Knock Knock “Who’s there?” Not Susie.
I still remember my granpas last words: turn the lawn mower off!
a mom cows last words were to the mom cows son they were you are then died the son though that he was adopted but then 3 years later the mom cow rose from the dead and said to her son that she was going to say you were adorable then she died once more then 2 years later she rose from htm title=' her son and that’s why we adopted you.'>the dead for the last time to say to her son and that’s why we adopted you.
When i was at work i say this kid crying i said where are your parents. God i love working in a orphanage
The last words my Dad spoke before he passed was, “Honey put down the knife we were only talking about getting a divorce.”
Why dose a milking stool have 3 legs? Because, the cow has the utter one.
why don’t emos live alone?they like to hang with their freinds.
Your legs are just like oreos! I wanna split the ends and eat whats in between.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef. What do you call a cow with 3 legs? Lean beef. What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Your mom.
A man walks to the window and opens it and pulls out his phone and takes a photo. “One more picture and I’ll jump.” He takes another photo and shuts the window. “I can’t jump, you’re not supposed to throw trash out the window.”
Me: Man I wish my clothes were emo. Friend:Why? Me:so they would hang themselves
So sad when the emo kid tried to give a high five to a tree To bad he left him hanging
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