Dark Humor

Three guys are on a plane one is Asian, one is Mexican, and the other is an American, and the Pilot says “There is to much weight on the plane, you all need to throw something off.” So the Mexican threw out a burrito and said , “I have plenty of these where I come from,” the the Asian threw out some rice and said “I have plenty of these in my country,” The American threw out a bomb and said, “I have a lot of these in my country.” The plane crashes anyway and the three men start to walk away from the crash, as they were walking the found a boy crying they asked him what was wrong and he said, “A ton of Buritos fell out of the sky and got me all messy,” The men started walking away and soon enough they found another boy crying they asked him what was wrong and he said, “A ton of rice fell out of the sky and sherded all my clothes.” The guys knew who did it but avoided the trouble, they kept on walking and found a kid laughing so hard he was on the ground, and they asked what had been so funny the boy said, “MY GRANDPA FARTED AND THE HOUSE BLEW UP!!!”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

i saw a little kid crying yesterday, so i asked him where his parents were. God i love working at an orphanage

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

All my jokes are cys for help INCLUDING THIS ONE

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

An Emo girl walks up to a tree to give it a high five… the tree left her hanging

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I’ll always remember my dads last words… Why do you have an axe we live in the city

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Are you suicide, cause you’re always on my mind

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Friend 1:Eyyy gurl Me:Hey! (Fake smile) Friend 2:hey g-guys what "bout we play would you rather? 6 hours later Friend 2:So (name) would u rather? 1.“Hang” out with me Or 2.“Jump” 1 times? Me…e-eh?..Why not both???we could just "Jump while “Hanging” out right?

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

If somebody cuts their leg off and hits you with it. Works they be kicking or hitting you?

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

I’ll never forget my brother’s last words: “Why is there a revolver in your hand?”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Kid: hey dad whats dark humor ? Dad: go walk up to that homeless guy and throw a rock at him . Kid: but dad I dont have any legs or arms . Dad: exactly son.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What do you call a sheep with no legs? A cloud

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Friend #1: “Yo guys, what’s the most unfair game you’ve ever played? For me it’s Fortnite.” Friend #2: “I’d have to say Monopoly.” Me: “The most unfair game you say? Life, definitely. Like, no one wins, it’s a one-way game.” Friend #2: “Uhh…that’s not exactly what he meant…” Friend #1: calls the suicide hotline

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

One night a girl said to her family "Goodnight Mommy, Goodnight Daddy, Goodnight Grandma, Goodbye Grandpa. the next morning her grandpa died. That night she said "Goodnight mommy, Goodnight daddy, Goodbye Grandma. the next morning the grandma died. The dad started to fear for his life because he was next. That night the girl said "Goodnight mommy, Goodbye daddy. the next morning the dad woke up and he was perfectly fine but when he went into the kitchen he saw his wife crying. when he asked her whats wrong she said “The Mail Man died”.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What is the difference between a Old Chest and a kid? One doesn’t cry when you drop it in the basement.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Once there was a girl named Sally! She had no arms or legs, was mute, deaf, and blind Knock knock Who’s there? Not sally

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
- up - << N E X T! >> random

© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2026