Dark Humor

What do suicidal people do in their spare time? Hang out.

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Emo kids counting be like: 1,2,3 come hang with me! 4,5,6 Gonna get new slits! 7,8,9 Suicide! 10,11,12 Bring some pills!

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Brother: I bought my brother a trampoline today, the ungrateful f@ck just sat in his wheelchair and cried if your depressed and you crying like this joke

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I remember my uncles last words: “I don’t think were going shooting today.”

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why do emos like circles because they can hang out with them

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Stephen hawkings last words were the windows closing sound

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What do you call a woman with one leg? Eileen.

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Teacher : Who here has thought about committing suicide? Half of the class : raises hand Teacher : … The half of the class: Starts talking about how they were thinking of doing it

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What did the rope say to me? “hey there man, you wanna hang later?”

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Kid:what is between moms legs? Dad:paridise. Kid whats between you legs? Dad:the key to paridise. Kid:well uou better change the lock the neighbor has the key to.

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Person A: cmon person B, just be happy, smile Person B: over my dead body Person B: gets the noose

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Orphan boy:Your dad is probably dissapointed of you i mean look at you Me: well at least my parents kept me wheres yours

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“I always like walking in the rain, so no one can see me crying.” -Charlie Chaplin

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What do you call a dog with no legs… My asian neighbors dinner. 

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i went to a butcher house with my little cousin and seen a baby pig and told her look its pepa pig she started crying

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