why do we tell actors to break a leg … so they can get in the cast!
The teacher asked her student to say the alphabet , The student recited the alphabet abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz, Where’s the p, He looked down to the floor and said : it’s running down my legs
Why were the cherries ?? crying? Because their parents were in a jam.
Me and my grandpa went on a road trip and he died that was the last thing we did together and I will never forget his last words “WAKE UP YOU DUMBASS”
knock knock who’s there? Depression medicine and therapy GO AWAY!
I will always remeber my dads last words… “15 dollars and ill jump.” if i could make someone tell me there last words theyd say " Make me"
i saw a little kid crying yesterday, so i asked him where his parents were. God i love working at an orphanage
What do you call a woman with one leg? Eileen.
What do you call a cow with two legs Answer: Your mom
There’s a man in Florida with no arms or legs who is armed and on the run
My life Tell me when you get it
What has 4 legs and 1 arm? A Doberman in a playground.
You must be depression, because you make me want to kill myself ;)
What made me laugh? The fact that my life is a joke:")
Therapist: So how depressed would you say you’ve been feeling lately? Me: I don’t care anymore if my foot hangs over the bed where a monster can get it Therapist [whispering]: Jesus, wow
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