When I saw a girl sitting on the ground crying When I asked her where her parents were, she cried louder That’s why I like to volunteer in an orphanage
What did the rope say to me? “hey there man, you wanna hang later?”
“Oh waiter! Waiter!” “Yes sir?” “Do you have frog’s legs?” “Why yes” “Good. Now hop along and get me a steak!”
What’s the similarity between a Christmas ornament and a person? They both hang…
What do you call a woman with one arm and one leg? Eileen Doctor approaches a patient in Hospital and says “I have some good news and bad news" so the patient says “What is the bad news?” the Doctor replies “I have had to amputate both your legs” so the patent says “Well what is the good news? ” the Doctor replies "I have found someone to buy your slippers”…
What’s the similarity between a broken pencil and my life? They’re both pointless.
Kid:what is between moms legs? Dad:paridise. Kid whats between you legs? Dad:the key to paridise. Kid:well uou better change the lock the neighbor has the key to.
A man in a wheelchair and his friend were walking down the street Man in Wheelchair: * falls out of wheelchair* Friend: Are you okay? Man in Wheelchair: I can’t feel my legs
whats the difference between onions and babys? i cry when i cut onions.
why did the kid cry? his dad didn’t get the milk
my dad said ill get the milk but he forgot i was i his car
I fear my last words will be ‘‘hold my beer and watch this.’’
Why did the strawberry cry? – Because his mother was in a jam.
What do suicidal people do in their spare time? Hang out.
why do we tell actors to break a leg … so they can get in the cast!
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