Dark Humor

The Orphan started crying at school when he got suspended and had to go home

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If you were a food what would you be? Friend 1-Pizza cause I’m so cheesy Friend 2-Chocolate chip cookie cause I have lots of friends Me-donut cause I’m so empty inside

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my grandpa’s last words were before died in vietnam was what f@ck did i step on…

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“Hold my beer, watch this.”

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Watches sad movie with family Everyone else: Crying Sister: How aren’t you crying? Me: I have no tear left to cry…

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What do emos and apples have in common? They both hang on trees.

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Bought my son a trampoline for his birthday, the ungrateful f@cker just sat in his wheelchair and cried

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What has 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.

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Father : “That’s great son. Who is she?” Son: “It’s Tina, the neighbor’s daughter”. Father : “Ohhh I wish you hadn’t said that.I have to tell u something son, but you must promise not to tell your mother.Tina is actually your sister.” The boy is naturally bummed out, but a couple of months later Son : “Daddy, I fell in love again and she is even hotter!” Father : “That’s great son. Who is she?” Son: “It’s Peny, the other neighbor’s daughter.” Father : “Ohhhh I wish you hadn’t said that. Peny is also your sister.” This went on couple of times and the son was so mad,he went straight to his mother crying. Son : “Mum I am so mad at dad ! I fell in love with six girls but I can’t date any of them because daddy is their father!” The mother hugs him affectionately and says: “My love, you can date whoever you want. Don’t listen to him. He is not your Father.”!!!

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Where do you find a turtle with no legs? Right where you left it.

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What do you call a smurf with no arms or legs? A paintball

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i will always remember my grandfathers last words “ill just check if its poisonous”.

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Orphans are the best targets for bullying, since who they gonna cry too? their parents?

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you tell an orphan joke to an orphan you start laughing they start crying they say they are going to tell their mom then you start laughing harder

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Me: Man I wish my clothes were emo. Friend:Why? Me:so they would hang themselves

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