Why did the strawberry cry? – Because his mother was in a jam.
There were three people on the third floor of a building the first one took a bite of a apple then said it was too hard so he threw it out the window the second person took a bite of a lemon he said it was too sour so he threw it out the window the third guy was drunk, he took a bite of a grenade and thought it was to crunchy so he threw it out the window then one of them went downstairs he saw a dog laying on the ground dead the apple had hit the dog in the head then there was a little girl crying with her cat in her lap it had died because the lemon fell out the window and hit it in the head next there was a old guy laughing i asked him why he was laugh he said “i farted and the building behind me blew up”.
Why do we tell actors to “break a leg”? Because every scene has a cast!
If you jump off a bridge while crying, it’s suicide, but if you jump off a bridge while screaming parquor it’s a failed stunt.
people talking me asking whats the worst day in the year for them. Person 1: The first day of school cause i don’t like going to school Person 2: Valentines day cause its to lovey Me: oh nice mines my birthday cause its when i was born
Why do trees never call emo kids? The emos always hang up on them.
why do we tell actors to break a leg … so they can get in the cast!
Why couldn’t the emo kid hang himself? After eating through his feelings the belt wouldn’t fit around his neck
What’s a depressed kids favorite holiday… Christmas because everything is hanging
To avoid getting drafted, a young man slips into a nunnery to hide from some draft board agents who are after him. Desperate, he approaches a nun and asks her to hide him. “Get under my robes,” says the nun. “No one will look for you there.” The nun lifts up her robes and the man says, “Hey, that’s a fine pair of legs you have there, sister.” “Yeah, well if you look a bit higher you’ll see a fine set of balls, ” replies the nun. “I didn’t want to get drafted either.”
My friends: ugh why are you so lazy and no fun My parents: why can’t u be like ur siblings My teacher: I don’t care if ur depressed focus on ur study! The songs: we understand you :)
What do you call a sheep with no legs? A cloud
What made me laugh? The fact that my life is a joke:")
i will always remember my grandfather’s last words before he died: is that a real chainsaw?
What is the difference between a sloth and a depressed kid? A sloth doesn’t need a rope to hang
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