Person: where do i commit sucide Dog: roof Person: good idea
If you watch " jaws" backward it will be a heartwarming story about a shark who giving arms and legs to disable people
Q:How do you make a door cry A:Twist it’s knob
What was Steven Hawking’s last words? ERROR 101
Little Jonny walks in on his parents having sex. He asks what their doing and the father says: “Well…We’re making you a brother.” So little Jonny runs off to let his parents finish, happy that he’s going to have a brother soon. The next day when little Jonny’s father comes come Jonny is crying out on the driveway. The father sits down next to Jonny and asks what’s wrong. Jonny cries: “I won’t have a baby brother!” HIs father is confused. “What do you mean?” He asks. “Because the mailman came by today and ate him!”
Little jonny waked in on his mom in the shower and said what’s that on your chest mom: those are my head lights oh what’s that in between your legs mom: oh that’s my bush jonny: oh OK next he waked in on his dad in the shower he said dad what’s that in between your legs dad: oh that’s my snake jonny: oh OK that night little jonny walks in on his parents going at it and said " mom turn on his head lights there’s a snake Going in your bush
I’ve looked everywhere… I just can’t seem to find where I left my will to live
Teacher : Who here has thought about committing suicide? Half of the class : raises hand Teacher : … The half of the class: Starts talking about how they were thinking of doing it
I cry a lot for someone who isn’t even properly hydrated
How many emos does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None they just sit in the dark and cry.
I’m going to hang myself in the bathroom at school and put a note telling kids that I’m a pinata
I’ll always remember my dads last words… Why do you have an axe we live in the city
Why didnt Logan Paul high five the asain man…because he loves to leave asains hanging
Other girls be like “I want a 6ft guy”, meanwhile I want to be 6ft under ????
What has 4 legs and 1 arm? A Doberman in a playground.
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