Wanna hear somethin’ ironic? When one cutter tells another cutter to stop, but he himself can’t stop cutting.
My mom always said garlic powder makes everything better so i sprinkled some on my divorce papers and my wifes broken leg.
What does a cannibal and a spider have in common? Both eight legs
I walked into the kitchen and saw my wife chopping up onions which made me cry. Onions was a good dog.
I’ll always remember my dads last words… Why do you have an axe we live in the city
“I wasn’t that drunk yesterday.” “Oh boy you took the shower head in your arms and told it to stop crying.”
What’s a depressed kids favorite holiday… Christmas because everything is hanging
Why dose a milking stool have 3 legs? Because, the cow has the utter one.
Why were the cherries ?? crying? Because their parents were in a jam.
An Emo girl walks up to a tree to give it a high five… the tree left her hanging
My girlfriends last words I can’t wait to become a mom
my dad said ill get the milk but he forgot i was i his car
Everything dissapers in the Bermuda triangle Except my depression Dark jokes are like water some people just don’t get it
If you drop an emo and a piece of paper from a tree which will hit the ground first? The piece of oaper because the rope will stop the emo
i will always remember my grandfathers last words “ill just check if its poisonous”.
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