Dark Humor

what do emos and the lorax have in common? they both hang with trees

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What do you call a man that has no arms, no legs and sits in front of your door? Mat.

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What do you call a smurf with no arms or legs? A paintball

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I have an auntie who has no arms and no legs. She is my dad’s half sister.

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Me: Wanna play 9/11? Friend: What’s that? Me: Its a game where I kick you in both legs and watch you fall.

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Why did the turkey cross the road twice? To prove he wasn’t a chicken!

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The emo kid tried to high five the tree But the tree left him hanging

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I’ll remember my last words…“SORRY IM NOT SORRY”

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My memes are ironic but my depression is chronic.

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They say string theory is hanging on by a thread.

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My friends: ugh why are you so lazy and no fun My parents: why can’t u be like ur siblings My teacher: I don’t care if ur depressed focus on ur study! The songs: we understand you :)

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A girl noticed hair growing between her legs and asked her mom about it. Her mom said it was her monkey and it grows hair.so she told her sister and her sister said that aint nothing mines already eating bananas

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What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves? Russel

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Why is sex like math? You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.

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Whats the difference between a school bus and my Dad’s van? Schools buses usually don’t have screaming and crying children

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