I remember my uncles last words: “I don’t think were going shooting today.”
They say Chuck Norris’s tears cure cancer, too bad he doesn’t cry
what do you call a dog with no legs? It don’t matter what you call it. It ain’t coming.
Me: Calls 9-1-1 Operator: 9/11 what’s your emergency? Me: hangs up
When you break up with your online girlfriend, and you hear your uncle crying in the other room.
Why was I stress eating on the train track? To wait to get hit.
You know people always say your life is worth it, but with me it’s worth-it-less
What’s the similarity between a broken pencil and my life? They’re both pointless.
Me and a person downtown. Person: Hey, crazy Saturday night. Me: I guess so. Person: Why do people do crazy stuff like this? Me: I don’t know. I used too, but don’t anymore. Person: why’d you stop? Me: unfortunately, I lived every time I’d try something.
When the emo kid hangs himself and the autistic kid thinks that it’s a pinata… BATTER UP TO THE PLATE!
A man walks to the window and opens it and pulls out his phone and takes a photo. “One more picture and I’ll jump.” He takes another photo and shuts the window. “I can’t jump, you’re not supposed to throw trash out the window.”
Whats a depressed persons favorite drink Depresso expresso Jk bleach
I woke up this morning thinking it was gonna be a great day. But then I realized I was still alive.
Depression is like therapy the more you see it the more you get used to it
Is Depression an emotion or a state of mind? I call it a lifestyle
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