What do you call a person with no arms or legs at your front door? Mat
I got a handjob of a blind woman the other day she said its the biggest thing i ever had in my hand i said no love your just pulling my leg
What do suicidal people do in their spare time? Hang out.
Little Johnny is watching his dad shave one morning and his dad was making alot of mistakes. Suddenly his dad screams " bitches and asses!" Johnny asks what it meant and his dad replied " aunts and uncles" Oh. next thing he hears is “dicks and pussies!” Johnny asks " what’s that mean?" To which his dad replied " uh coats and hats." Oh next thing he know he sees his dad jumping around the the bathroom yelling " f@cking, f@ck,f@ck,f@ck" " what does that mean dad?" And his dad yells " cut Johnny, it means cut!!!" Oh. Next week is Thanksgiving and the doorbell rings and Johnny answers it and says " Hey bitches and asses, hang your dicks and pussies here, dad’s in the kitchen f@cking the turkey.
I remember my grandfathers last words: Are you holding the ladder
where to people with no legs go to have fun? legno land
I’ll never forget my brother’s last words: “Why is there a revolver in your hand?”
my dad said ill get the milk but he forgot i was i his car
The Orphan started crying at school when he got suspended and had to go home
where do you find a dog with no arms or legs -where you left it
what’s the difference between an onion and a baby? nobody cries when you cut up the baby.
A man woke up from a serious surgery. He screamed, “Doctor! Doctor! I can’t feel my legs!”. And the doctor replied, “I know. I amputated you arms.”
What do you call a man that has no arms, no legs and sits in front of your door? Mat.
What do you call a dog with no legs? – Doesn’t matter what you call him, he’s not coming.
The last words my Dad spoke before he passed was, “Honey put down the knife we were only talking about getting a divorce.”
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