Three men are outside Heaven’s gates waiting to be go to through Heaven. The angel at the gate tells them “Depending on the length of time and your faithfulness to your last partner decides your way across the bridge to Heaven”. The first guy says “I was with my wife for 5 years and cheated 3 times”. The angel gives him an old model pick up, the second guy says “11 years and only once” and is granted a Mercedes. The last man says “20 years and not once , I loved her with all my heart” and with the angel impressed he gets a gold edition Lamborghini and sets off ahead of the other two men. Hours later the two men catch up to him crying behind the wheel and one says " I know we are dead but it could be much worse". The guy looks up and says “How! I just went past my wife on a skateboard”
Why did the Chinese woman hang up? Because she Wang the Wong number
whats the similarities between an emo and some Christmas lights they are both going to be hanging from a tree
Everything dissapers in the Bermuda triangle Except my depression Dark jokes are like water some people just don’t get it
I still remember my dad’s last words "don’t worry son, Allah will be pleased"
A man in a wheelchair and his friend were walking down the street Man in Wheelchair: * falls out of wheelchair* Friend: Are you okay? Man in Wheelchair: I can’t feel my legs
What’s the difference between a man and a table. The table doesn’t cry when I break it’s legs
Why is a orphan crying about its family? Because it cant “let it go”
When I saw a girl sitting on the ground crying When I asked her where her parents were, she cried louder That’s why I like to volunteer in an orphanage
Once I saw A girl crying and asked where are your parents; God I love working at orphanages.
You must be depression, because you make me want to kill myself ;)
What does a priest and a clown have in common? They both make children cry
i will never forget my little brothers last word rip. his last words: paint dosent taste good
What’s under the bottom? Your legs.
knock knock who’s there? Depression medicine and therapy GO AWAY!
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