What’s the difference between the real Jesus and a picture of him ? It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.
What do you call a dog with no legs ? It doesn’t matter he isn’t coming to you.
I will always remember my baby sisters last words.“What is the fire for?”.
why don’t you see elephants hiding in trees? Bc they’re good at it.
A man is about to be hanged. His executioner asks for his last words. The man says: “Man, it’s hard to think of something when your life is on the line.”
My neck, my back, my crippling anxiety attacks
Dont say your life is a joke because jokes got meaning.
Q:What did one koala say to the other? A:Hows it hanging.??
I remember grandpas last words “oh shit it’s in drive”
So there’s a little girl playing hopscotch at the front of her house while her mother hangs up the washing and her father mows the lawn. She says “Step on a crack and you break your mother’s back,”. The father laughs, until his daughter steps on a crack resulting in her mother’s back breaking. The little girl’s father looks in terror, she then says “step on a line and you break your father’s spine,”. The father closes his eyes waiting for his spine to break, but nothing happens. When he opens his eyes again he sees that he is ok, and nothing has happened to him. Suddenly he hears someone yell out “OW MY SPINE, ”. The father runs around the corner to see the mailman laying on the floor.
A pirate walked into a bar with his ship’s steering wheel hanging off his pants. The bartender says, “Hey! What’s with the steering wheel?” The pirate says, “I don’t know but it’s driving me nuts! ” I got detention yesterday because I told the emo kid to “Hang in there.”
whats the difference between onions and babys? i cry when i cut onions.
Denki- hey mineta i have a joke Mineta- …go on… Denki- Ochakos booty Mineta- i dont get it? Denki- exactly Mineta- cries T_T
What do you call a person with no arms or legs at your front door? Mat
I don’t see why people say that emo kid doesn’t like to hangout I seen them hanging all day.
RUS | ENG
