Dark Humor

Why does sumo wrestlers shave their legs? Because they don’t want to be mistaken as feminists

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A man is about to be hanged. His executioner asks for his last words. The man says: “Man, it’s hard to think of something when your life is on the line.”

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Once there was a girl named Sally! She had no arms or legs, was mute, deaf, and blind Knock knock Who’s there? Not sally

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I will never forget my grandpa’s last words: Alahu-Akbar i will remember my aunties last word: if you shoot me you pen-s is small (gun shot)

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What has 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.

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There were three people on the third floor of a building the first one took a bite of a apple then said it was too hard so he threw it out the window the second person took a bite of a lemon he said it was too sour so he threw it out the window the third guy was drunk, he took a bite of a grenade and thought it was to crunchy so he threw it out the window then one of them went downstairs he saw a dog laying on the ground dead the apple had hit the dog in the head then there was a little girl crying with her cat in her lap it had died because the lemon fell out the window and hit it in the head next there was a old guy laughing i asked him why he was laugh he said “i farted and the building behind me blew up”.

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Why couldn’t the emo kid hang himself? After eating through his feelings the belt wouldn’t fit around his neck

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Famous last words of my uncle: (a bomb disposal expert) yes the red wire

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Me: Calls 9-1-1 Operator: 9/11 what’s your emergency? Me: hangs up

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Whats Big, bounces, and make little kids cry? my donation to the orphanage :)

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