Sam is a kindergartener. One day, Sam’s teacher told him to learn the first few letters of the alphabet. Later that night, Sam asked his moody sister what the first letter of the alphabet was and she replied with “Oh what’s the point. Life is meaningless…”. Sam then went up to his room and found his brother crying on the floor. Sam asked him what the next letter was. “I hate you!” said sam’s brother, so Sam left the room. Sam went to his mom and asked her what the third letter was. “You stupid f*****” his mom yelled at him. So Sam went to ask his Grandpa what the fourth letter is and his grandpa didn’t reply, so Sam went to bed.
The next day, Sam’s teacher called on him to tell the class what the first letter is and he answered with “Oh what’s the point. Life is meaningless…” and the teacher sent him to the school counselor. As he left the room, he yelled at his teacher “I hate you!”
As Sam arrived at the counselors office she said she had called his parents and they wanted him to be safe and locked up in a padded cell. “You stupid f*****” Sam screamed as he heard the ambulance sirens getting nearer. As the ambulance drove away, Sam, in his straight jacket, was silent.
Why were the cherries?? crying?
Because their parents were in a jam.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It don’t matter what you call it. It ain’t coming.
Once I saw A girl crying and asked where are your parents; God I love working at orphanages.
Sometimes i get jealous when my phone dies
A man is walking on the deck of a cruise ship, when he sees a woman, without arms and legs, crying. The man says “What’s wrong?” The woman says “I’ve never been hugged before.” So, the man gives her a hug and walks away.
The next day, the man sees the woman, on the deck, crying again. The man says “What’s wrong, now?” The woman says “I’ve never been kissed before.” So, the man gives her a kiss and walks away.
The next day, the same thing occurs. The man says “Oh, for Christ’s sake! What’s wrong, this time?!” The woman says “Well, I’ve never been f@cked before.” So, the man picks her up, throws her into the ocean, and yells “YOU’RE f@ckED!”
Whats the similarities between an emo and some Christmas lights
They are both going to be hanging from a tree
I will never forget my grandfathers last words. “The f@ck you doing whit that knife
What’s the difference between a onion and a viola? No one cries when they cut up the viola
What do you say to your sister when she’s crying? – “Are you having a crisis?”
I cry a lot for someone who isn’t even properly hydrated
What is the worst motivational thing to say to a depressed person?
If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.
What was stephan Hawkins last words\windows10shutting down
What made me laugh?
The fact that my life is a joke: ")
Me: Mom I’m tired
Mom:then go to sleep
Me: No you don’t understand-
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