Dark Humor

Orphan boy:Your dad is probably dissapointed of you i mean look at you Me: well at least my parents kept me wheres yours

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a boy got a soccer ball and a bike for Christmas. Why is he sad? He doesn’t have legs

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So you know those people that commit suicide by hanging them selves I guess they lost Hangman

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i will remember my brothers last words: if you cant put a fork in a toaster how about a spoon

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To whoever has my voodoo doll, please hold its hand.

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are you sad then don’t be sad because sad backwards is das and das no good.

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What did the rope say to me? “hey there man, you wanna hang later?”

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What does PEMDAS stand for? Please End My Depression And Suffering

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if things dont get better the Christmas lights wont be the only thing hanging

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Just all us depressed people joking about our depressed lives, we should hang out sometime

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A policeman found a dead body of a man on the street, he thought he recognized the body and the 2 friends he usually hung out with so he called in one of the friends. The friend looked into the dead body’s face and said, “yep that’s definitely Joe,” but then to be absolutely sure he turned the body over, pulled down the back of his pants and said, "oh no wait that’s not Joe. the policeman called in the 2nd friend, the 2nd friend looked into the dead body’s face and said, “yep that’s definitely Joe,” but then to be absolutely sure he turned the body over, pulled down the back of his pants and said, "oh no wait that’s not Joe. Confused the policeman asked, “how is it that when you look into his face you’re sure he is your friend, but when you look at his ass you’re sure he is not?” The 1st friend said, “well you see Joe has 2 assholes.” "Are you serious? the policeman asked. “Oh yes,” he replied, “we’ve never actually seen them but when the 3 of us hang out together people point and say, hey there’s Joe with those 2 assholes.”

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What’s a similarity Cliff Hanger and Nooses? They both leave you Hanging

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a man walks into a bar, and notices a steak hanging from the ceiling. when he asks the bartender about it, the bartender says “If you can jump up and hit it, drinks are on the house for the night, but if you miss, everyone’s drinks are on your tab for the next two hours. Do you want to try? ” the man decided not to take the risk. he thought the steaks where too high.

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My neck, my back, my crippling anxiety attacks

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What do suicidal people do in their spare time? Hang out.

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