Why does sumo wrestlers shave their legs? Because they don’t want to be mistaken as feminists
A man is about to be hanged. His executioner asks for his last words. The man says: “Man, it’s hard to think of something when your life is on the line.”
Once there was a girl named Sally! She had no arms or legs, was mute, deaf, and blind Knock knock Who’s there? Not sally
Why was I stress eating on the train track? To wait to get hit.
I will never forget my grandpa’s last words: Alahu-Akbar i will remember my aunties last word: if you shoot me you pen-s is small (gun shot)
where to people with no legs go to have fun? legno land
So sad when the emo kid tried to give a high five to a tree To bad he left him hanging
What has 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
There were three people on the third floor of a building the first one took a bite of a apple then said it was too hard so he threw it out the window the second person took a bite of a lemon he said it was too sour so he threw it out the window the third guy was drunk, he took a bite of a grenade and thought it was to crunchy so he threw it out the window then one of them went downstairs he saw a dog laying on the ground dead the apple had hit the dog in the head then there was a little girl crying with her cat in her lap it had died because the lemon fell out the window and hit it in the head next there was a old guy laughing i asked him why he was laugh he said “i farted and the building behind me blew up”.
Why couldn’t the emo kid hang himself? After eating through his feelings the belt wouldn’t fit around his neck
Famous last words of my uncle: (a bomb disposal expert) yes the red wire
Suicide is never the answer Suicide is the question The answer is yes
Me: Calls 9-1-1 Operator: 9/11 what’s your emergency? Me: hangs up
Whats Big, bounces, and make little kids cry? my donation to the orphanage :)
If you drop an emo and a piece of paper from a tree which will hit the ground first? The piece of oaper because the rope will stop the emo
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