Last word of mayor of Hiroshima: ‘what the f@ck was that noise?’ What where Stephens last words “battery low”
When its been halloween for a few months but there’s still a body hanging from your neighbours tree
I got a handjob of a blind woman the other day she said its the biggest thing i ever had in my hand i said no love your just pulling my leg
a boy got a soccer ball and a bike for Christmas. Why is he sad? He doesn’t have legs
i will remember my brothers last words: if you cant put a fork in a toaster how about a spoon
Who needs April fools… When your whole life is a joke?
What’s a depressed kids favorite holiday… Christmas because everything is hanging
What is the difference between a Old Chest and a kid? One doesn’t cry when you drop it in the basement.
what has two legs and is red all over? half a cat
What was stephan Hawkins last words\windows10shutting down
Little Johnny’s sister Suzy sees her mom in the shower and asks what is that between your legs? Her mom responds, “That is my garage”. The next day Suzy sees her dad in the shower and says, “What is that between your legs?” Her dad answers, “It is a motorcycle that gets parked in mommy’s garage.” The next day Suzy came to dinner with blood all over her hands. Her mom asks, “Why is there blood all over your hands Suzy?” Suzy says, " Well… little Johnny tried to put his motorcycle in my garage so I ripped its wheels off."
im jealous at me led lights. cause they r hanging from the celling ans im not.
Person: where do i commit sucide Dog: roof Person: good idea
Me: Calls 9-1-1 Operator: 9/11 what’s your emergency? Me: hangs up
I’ll never forget my father’s last words… Oh f@ck, it’s a bus!
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