Dark Humor

Where do you find a turtle with no legs? Right where you left it.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you left it.

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To whoever stole my antidepressants I hope you are happy now

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Emo kids counting be like: 1,2,3 come hang with me! 4,5,6 Gonna get new slits! 7,8,9 Suicide! 10,11,12 Bring some pills!

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What does a cannibal and a spider have in common? Both eight legs

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What did Steven Hawlkings last words? Error 404 File Not Found

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I will always remember my uncle’s last words, “What’s The Shovel For?”

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Bro I love hanging out with white people, its either we play Yahtzee Or We Playin Nazi

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I was speaking at my grandpa’s funeral and I told everybody his last words: “You still holding the latter?”

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what fell down the tree first the emo or the apple guess what the apple because the emo got left hanging

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knock knock whos their boo boo who well you dont have to cry about it gary

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I went to visit my friends sick grandpa. He was lying in a hospital bed connected to a lot of tubes. When I approached him he kept repeating “Ni caizhe wo de yangqi guan” Suddenly right in front of me, he passed. Later that night I translated his last words, and they were “You’re standing on my oxygen tube”

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I’ll always remember my Dad’s last words before he died on 9/11… Allahu Akbar!

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i remember my moms last words before her divorce, did you just load in me.

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“I wasn’t that drunk yesterday.” “Oh boy you took the shower head in your arms and told it to stop crying.”

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