Dark Humor

I woke up this morning thinking it was gonna be a great day. But then I realized I was still alive.

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To whoever stole my antidepressants I hope you are happy now

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“I always like walking in the rain, so no one can see me crying.” -Charlie Chaplin

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I will never forget my Grandpa’s last words, “What are you doing with that rope and saw”

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3 men walk into heaven at the same time. they all live in the same city. god asks the first man “how did you die?” the man says “I have a heart condition and iv’e been suspecting my wife of cheating for some time. anyway I get how from work and I see my wife on the bed and a man hang of the balcony. I get so mad and stomp on the guys fingers! he falls into a bush so I throw a refrigerator on him.” God asks the next man “how did you die?” the man says I was cleaning the windows and then this crazy man starts stomping on my fingers! luckily I fall safely in a bush! but then a refrigerator falls on me! " god asks the third man he says" I was the one in the fridge!"

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Snow everywhere, it’s Christmas time. A person looks at the tree. The person: Only last thing left to hang! He grabs a noose.

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what was my great grandpas last words SHIT MG42!!!

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I wish my hair was depressed Cause then it would cut itself

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“Oh waiter! Waiter!” “Yes sir?” “Do you have frog’s legs?” “Why yes” “Good. Now hop along and get me a steak!”

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Why did the Chinese woman hang up? Because she Wang the Wong number

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You’d think my son would be happy that Daddy bought him a new bike. But no… oh no he just sits in his wheelchair and cries like a little girl.

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A depressed boy went to high five a tree guess what the tree did? The tree left him hanging

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are you sad then don’t be sad because sad backwards is das and das no good.

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Kids are so ungrateful sometimes. I bought a wheelchair for my son, Did he say thank you? Nope! That mtf just sat in his wheelchair the whole time crying the whole day.??

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I was crying at school telling my friends my grandpa died, And they asked me what his last words were. His last words were “Are you still holding the ladder?”

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