I will always remember my grandfather’s last words before he died: is that a real chainsaw?
“Go big or go home”, that’s what some people say.
“Go loud and proud”, that’s what other people say.
“Go out with a big, loud bang!”, that’s what I say.
Wanna hear some famous last words? “We are just experiencing some turbulence”
How do you get a depressed person out of a tree?
You cut the rope…
What do you call a woman with one leg?
Eileen.
Me having a good day Going on a walk on a peaceful day* my depression: hey whats up! Me: go away. My depression: well how rude. Me:??. My depression: remeber that one tim… Me: no, dont even. My depression: that we… Me: nope. My deprssion: says really fast:said that one stupid joke that wasnt funny and everybody just stared at you, and then you spilt water all over yourself and it looked like you peed yourself. And you went home and cried yourself to sleep just like yoy do every single night. Me:???. My depression:?? dont worry I’ll always be here for you.
So if the reason people used to hang women because they were seen as witches back in the day, if boys were to be hung would they be called wizards?
My dad, unfortunately, passed away when we couldn’t remember his blood type… His last words to us were, “Be positive!”
What’s a depressed kids favorite holiday… Christmas because everything is hanging
Why do emos like circles because they can hang out with them
I walked into the kitchen and saw my wife chopping up onions which made me cry.
Onions was a good dog.
To whoever has my voodoo doll, please hold its hand.
I know Im valuable, I come with a barcode ;)
I cannot moderate myself at all. It’s either I don’t take my meds, or I take the entire bottle. Decisions decisions…
Bleach solves so many problems, Staines, Dirty dishes, messes, and over population
I will remember my biker buddies last words?Why did you cut in front of me?.
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