Dark Humor

What has two legs but can’t walk? Pants ??

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Boys: “Hey, can billy come out and play baseball?” Mom: “That’s not funny, you know billy doesn’t have any arms and legs” Boys: “I know, we need a third base”

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What is the difference between a washing machine and a child…? The washing machine doesn’t cry when you put a load in it.

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I told the judge I thought she was unconscious before she woke up crying. The judge asked: why didn’t you drug her again so she would forget?

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Is Depression an emotion or a state of mind? I call it a lifestyle

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What do you call a dog with no legs… My asian neighbors dinner. 

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You can’t YEE your last H A W! but I put my BALLS in ur JAW.

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Why did the turkey cross the road twice? To prove he wasn’t a chicken!

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Me: Man I wish my clothes were emo. Friend:Why? Me:so they would hang themselves

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U wanna hear a Suicide joke nvm it didn’t make it

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i got in trouble in school for leaving the depressed kid hanging

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Why did Billy not like the soccer ball he got for Christmas?.. He has no legs…

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are you a rope? bc i wanna hang with you

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My grandma just died from cancer My last words to her were “I like your cut g”

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grandfathers last words :Stop shaking the ladder you cunt Grandmother last words : you know how to use that hammer Dads last words : Always aim before you shoot that gun Moms last words : Turn of the stove when you’re done My last thought : am I a murder

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