Dark Humor

what does an apple and a lawyer have in common? they both look good hanging from a tree

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I’ll never forget my Grandads last words…SON WHERE DID U GET A GRENADE FROM?!

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a mom cows last words were to the mom cows son they were you are then died the son though that he was adopted but then 3 years later the mom cow rose from the dead and said to her son that she was going to say you were adorable then she died once more then 2 years later she rose from htm title=' her son and that’s why we adopted you.'>the dead for the last time to say to her son and that’s why we adopted you.

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i have no friends but then i realize my true friends are anxiety and depression

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my grandpa died in 9/11 i was told his last words where Allahu Akbar

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“I always like walking in the rain, so no one can see me crying.” -Charlie Chaplin

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Famous last words: “Don’t worry man, it’s not even loaded.”

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If you were a food what would you be? Friend 1-Pizza cause I’m so cheesy Friend 2-Chocolate chip cookie cause I have lots of friends Me-donut cause I’m so empty inside

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I started crying when my mom was cutting up onions Onions was a good dog

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I cry a lot for someone who isn’t even properly hydrated

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I was crying when Sasha died in AOT, i also got jealous.

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The teacher asked her student to say the alphabet , The student recited the alphabet abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz, Where’s the p, He looked down to the floor and said : it’s running down my legs

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i got in trouble in school for leaving the depressed kid hanging

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Sometimes i get jealous when my phone dies

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Being sad is my only happiness

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