What do you call a dog with no legs… My asian neighbors dinner.
“Hold my beer, watch this.”
If you watch " jaws" backward it will be a heartwarming story about a shark who giving arms and legs to disable people
Why is a orphan crying about its family? Because it cant “let it go”
So there’s a little girl playing hopscotch at the front of her house while her mother hangs up the washing and her father mows the lawn. She says “Step on a crack and you break your mother’s back,”. The father laughs, until his daughter steps on a crack resulting in her mother’s back breaking. The little girl’s father looks in terror, she then says “step on a line and you break your father’s spine,”. The father closes his eyes waiting for his spine to break, but nothing happens. When he opens his eyes again he sees that he is ok, and nothing has happened to him. Suddenly he hears someone yell out “OW MY SPINE, ”. The father runs around the corner to see the mailman laying on the floor.
Ill never forget my mother last words. What’s are doing with that sledge hammer i will never forget my girlfriends last words…"get off of me STOP"slurp…Dead
I wish i could be as visible as my depression is. My future is so bright, i need a flashlight to see where i’m going
why does a movie set say break a leg? because they have a CAST
if you ever get mad at a person that cramppled their leg. don’t forget that they can hide but they cant run.
I’m going to hang myself in the bathroom at school and put a note telling kids that I’m a pinata
“Go big or go home”, that’s what some people say. “Go loud and proud”, that’s what other people say. “Go out with a big, loud bang!”, that’s what I say.
What did the rope say to me? “hey there man, you wanna hang later?”
my advice to suicidal people: just hang in there ??
Why were the cherries ?? crying? Because their parents were in a jam.
Me: Man I wish my clothes were emo. Friend:Why? Me:so they would hang themselves
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