Dark Humor

what does an apple and a lawyer have in common? they both look good hanging from a tree

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I was crying at school telling my friends my grandpa died, And they asked me what his last words were. His last words were “Are you still holding the ladder?”

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“I always like walking in the rain, so no one can see me crying.” -Charlie Chaplin

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are you a rope? bc i wanna hang with you

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What do suicidal people do in their spare time? Hang out.

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I wont ever Forget my dads last words: “OH GOD THE POLICE!!!”

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Q:What was my son’s last words before he died. A:Bye dad i am going to school.

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What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef. What do you call a cow with 3 legs? Lean beef. What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Your mom.

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Orphan boy:Your dad is probably dissapointed of you i mean look at you Me: well at least my parents kept me wheres yours

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WAIT! I remember how the joke goes! These two cannibals i hanging out eat lunch, which is a clown you see, cause there cannibals and one cannibal says to the other cannibal "Does this taste funny to you?

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why arent emos n trees friends? cus the tree leaves them hanging

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Bought my son a trampoline for his birthday, the ungrateful f@cker just sat in his wheelchair and cried

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What do you call a guy with no arms and legs, at you front door? Matt

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Watches sad movie with family Everyone else: Crying Sister: How aren’t you crying? Me: I have no tear left to cry…

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What has 4 legs and 1 arm? A Doberman in a playground.

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