a depressed kid tried to give a tree high-five but the tree left him hanging People at my school have started to wear Logan Paul merch. I try to give them a high five, but they always leave me hanging.
Q: what happened when the depressed kid wanted to high five the tree? A: It left him/her/them hanging
Kid: hey dad whats dark humor ? Dad: go walk up to that homeless guy and throw a rock at him . Kid: but dad I dont have any legs or arms . Dad: exactly son.
What do you call a cow with no legs Ground beef…haha…no one likes my jokes
What do you call a man off the ground? Hanged.
Little jonny waked in on his mom in the shower and said what’s that on your chest mom: those are my head lights oh what’s that in between your legs mom: oh that’s my bush jonny: oh OK next he waked in on his dad in the shower he said dad what’s that in between your legs dad: oh that’s my snake jonny: oh OK that night little jonny walks in on his parents going at it and said " mom turn on his head lights there’s a snake Going in your bush
Why do trees never call emo kids? The emos always hang up on them.
A man woke up from a serious surgery. He screamed, “Doctor! Doctor! I can’t feel my legs!”. And the doctor replied, “I know. I amputated you arms.”
Me: Man I wish my clothes were emo. Friend:Why? Me:so they would hang themselves
Why Couldn’t the Japanese man give a high five? Because Logan Paul left him hanging.
Brian has a crush on a cute girl Sally from school so he goes and tells his dad about her and he says sorry son you cant like her she is your sister. So Brian is okay with it and he starts to like another girl Madison and he goes up to his dad and says I have a crush on this girl Madison and again the dad goes oh sorry son you cant like any girl in school they are all your sisters so he goes crying to his mom and says dad said I cant like any girl because they are all my sisters and the mom goes oh it’s okay you can like any girl you want because he is not your dad.
To the guy asking what joy I find in suicide jokes, the answer is simple. I make suicide jokes to cope with my crippling depression. Must be working, cause I’m still here
What do you call a cow that has two legs shorter on one side of its body compared to the other? LEAN BEEF!
Last words of the captain of the Titanic… Where’s all this water come from??
If I went to walmart, I would be able to scan my own wrists because they’re barcodes too.
RUS | ENG