What’s the difference between a cranky two-year-old and a duckling? – One is a whiny toddler, and the other is a tiny waddler.
What the difference between Rubik’s cube and a penis? I don’t know but they both get harder the more you play with them
What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and the computer he’s hooked up to? – The computer runs.
What’s the difference between Dubai and Abu Dhabi? – People in Dubai don’t like the Flintstones but people in Abu Dhabi doooo.
What’s the difference between a black & a white fairy tail? White begins, “Once upon a time…” Black begins, " Yall mutherf@ckers aint gonna believe dis shit"
3 construction workers where sitting on the bridge that they where building having their lunch break. The first guy says “If I get a vegimite sandwich again I am going to jump off this bridge.” The second guys says “If get a peanut butter sandwich again I am going to jump off this bridge”. The third guy says if I get another strawberry jam sandwich then I am going to jump off this bridge.” The next day the first guy gets a vegimite sandwich, the second guy gets a peanut butter sandwich and the third guy gets a strawberry jam sandwich. All 3 guys jump of the bridge and die. The next day at their funerals the first wife says “If he just told me I would have given him a different sandwich.” The second guys wife says “It is all my fault. If only I knew.” The third wife says “I don’t get it, he makes his own lunch.”
What’s the difference between a knife and my life? A knife has a point.
the difference between dark jokes and morbid is dark jokes are 10 babies in 1 trash can and morbid jokes are 1 baby in 10 trash cans
Whats the difference between a smart blonde and Bigfoot? Bigfoot has been sighted.
What’s the difference between a prostitute and a daredevil? One has cunning stunts, whilst the other has a stunning…
How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber? Ask them to pronounce “unionized”.
What’s the difference between an ISIS training center and a school?? I don’t know, I just fly the drone
What’s the difference between a Catholic Priest and a pedophile? One is Catholic
What’s the difference between a hamster and a cigarette? They’re both harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire
What’s the difference between humans and bullets? Humans miss John Lennon
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