What is the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is a refreshing summertime snack the other one is a watermelon.
Two homeless alcoholics want to get drunk but don’t have enough money for even the cheapest drinks in any bar. So one of them devises a clever plan : he tells his friend “We should buy a hot-dog sausage with the last of our money and stick it down my pants, then drink a load of drinks but then when the bill comes you get down and suck on the hot-dog and it’ll look like you’re sucking on my dick so then we’ll get thrown out without paying and we can just go to another bar and do the same thing again”. His friend agrees so they buy the hot-dog, stick it down the first dude’s pants, go to the bar and then the second dude begins to suck on the hot-dog as agreed. They are thrown out and hit another four bars this way. In the end, as they lie drunk on the floor in some alleyway, the second guy says, “Well, what a great night. Free beers in five different bars!” The first guy says “Yeah! Especially since the hot-dog fell out before we even reached the first bar!”
What’s the difference between a bus full of children and a fish? The fish can swim
What’s the difference between people and chocolate? I can still buy dark chocolate
What’s the difference between a Catholic Priest and a pedophile? One is Catholic
What’s the difference between an orphan and a watermelon? One of them is fun to hit with a sledge hammer and the other one is just a watermelon
What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb You can unscrew a light bulg whats the difference between a bmw and a porcupine unlike the porcupine the pricks are on the inside
What’s the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator The fridge dont fart when you take your meat out
What’s the difference between the real Jesus and a picture of him ? It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.
What’s the difference between a white and a black fairytale? White begins with, ‘Once upon a time…’, black begins with,’ Y’all motherf……s ain’t gonna believe this sh…’
What’s the difference between a knife and my life? A knife has a point.
What is the difference in having a granny fetish and necrophilia? A few weeks.
What’s the difference between parents and depression? at least one of them leave you
Whats the difference between a Silver Medal and a Priest? They both came in a little behind.
What’s the difference between a school and a isis military base? Don’t ask me I only fly the drone…
RUS | ENG
