What’s the difference?

What is the difference between a cat and a complex sentence? – A cat has claws at the end of its paws. A complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.

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What’s the difference between Issac Newton and the baby I just stabbed to death? Issac Newton dies a virgin.

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What is the difference between a Priest and a Doctor The Doctor doesn’t like to give physicals.

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What’s the difference between my dad and a hooker? Hookers come back.

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What’s the difference between a gay guy and a microwave? The microwave doesn’t brown the meat.

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what is the difference between stephen hawkings and a walkie talkie he doesnt walkie or talkie

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I was digging in our garden when I found a chest full of gold coins. I was about to run straight home to tell my wife about it, but then I remembered why I was digging in our garden.

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What’s the difference between a bird and a human? “We don’t eat with our peckers

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What is the difference between me and a knife? The knife has a point.

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Father and mother are making love in the bedroom. Mother is on top of father. Suddenly the son enters the bedroom. Everyone is embarrassed, of course. The next morning, the mother takes the little boy aside and says, “I’ll tell you about what you saw yesterday, you know Dad has a big belly and that’s why mom sometimes sits on top of that belly to push it flat.” . Says that little boy: “But mama, that does not make any difference.” “Oh no?” the mom asks. “No,” says the little boy, “When you go to work, the neighbor comes, and she puts herself on her knees for Dad, and sheblows his belly up again!”

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What’s the difference between a nun and a woman in a bath tub? One’s got hope in her soul, the others got soap in her hole.

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why doesn’t barbie ever get pregnant ? Because Ken comes in a different box !!!

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whats the difference between McDonald’s and a priest nothing… they both stick their meat in ten year old buns

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What’s the difference between a school and a isis military base? Don’t ask me I only fly the drone…

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what’s the difference between eggs,and you?eggs get laid,you don’t.

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