I was digging in our garden when I found a chest full of gold coins. I was about to run straight home to tell my wife about it, but then I remembered why I was digging in our garden.
Him: What’s The Difference Between Incestry.com and Ancestry.com? Her: What? Him: Nothing, Either way you will be dating your Cousin
What’s the difference between princess Dianna and Thomas the tank engine Thomas came out the other end of the tunnel
What is the difference between a coconut and your ex? One is fun to knock down by throwing rocks at the other one is a coconut.
What’s the difference between a priest and a rabbi, the rabbi cuts it off the the priest sucks it off
What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb You can unscrew a light bulg whats the difference between a bmw and a porcupine unlike the porcupine the pricks are on the inside
What’s the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.
What’s the difference between a teacher and a train? The teacher says, “Spit out your gum,” but a train says, “Chew chew!”
What’s the difference between fruit and dead babies? I don’t put fruit in a blender. Whats the difference between Stephen Hawking an a walkie talkie? Stephen cant walkie an stephen cant talkie
Roast: What is the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus? One is hairy and smells like fish and the other is a walrus. Your welcome What is the difference between a Catholic priest and Acne? – Acne comes on your face after you turn 13.
What’s the difference between a blonde and a masqueto? A masqueto stops sucking when you slap it
My kids are so ungrateful. I got them a new dishwasher and they just won’t stop complaining about their mom whats the difference between a lightbulb and a preganant woman you can unscrew the lightbulb
Q: What is the difference between a drunk and a stoner at a stop sign? A: The drunk guy runs it and the stoner waits for it to turn green!
Father and mother are making love in the bedroom. Mother is on top of father. Suddenly the son enters the bedroom. Everyone is embarrassed, of course. The next morning, the mother takes the little boy aside and says, “I’ll tell you about what you saw yesterday, you know Dad has a big belly and that’s why mom sometimes sits on top of that belly to push it flat.” . Says that little boy: “But mama, that does not make any difference.” “Oh no?” the mom asks. “No,” says the little boy, “When you go to work, the neighbor comes, and she puts herself on her knees for Dad, and sheblows his belly up again!”
What is the difference between a washing machine and a child…? The washing machine doesn’t cry when you put a load in it.
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