Three Nuns died in a car crash, they went up to heaven at the pearly gates the gate keeper said this really should not have happened so I am going to send you back to earth as different people so tell me who you want to be or look like the first nun said I want to look like Madonna puff,you look like her now and but you can’t use her name And sent her down to earth. The second one said I want to look like Marilyn Monroe he then makes her look like her and sends her down to earth. The third nun I said I want to look like Sarah Pipalini. The gate keeper says to her, Sarah Pipalini who is that? she gives the gate keeper a newspaper article he reads it shakes his head no and says it’s not Sarah Pipalini it Sahara pipeline laid by 500 men.
What is the difference between a cat and a complex sentence? – A cat has claws at the end of its paws. A complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.
Whats the difference between a hippie chick and a hockey player? – The hockey player showers after 3 periods.
What’s the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead bodies I dont have a Lamborghini in my garage
whats the difference between a cat and a bannana, its hard to peel a cat
What is the difference between a Priest and a Doctor The Doctor doesn’t like to give physicals.
What’s the difference between a baby and a salad? Most people don’t get angry when you toss a salad.
There was the person who sent ten different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.
Whats the difference between a gay guy and a freezer? The freezer doesn’t fart when you pull the meat out
Whats the difference between a school bus and my Dad’s van? Schools buses usually don’t have screaming and crying children
What do turtles and lesbians have in common they both choke on plastic
What’s the difference between apple’s and orphans apples actually get picked I made a website for orphans but sadly it didn’t have a home page.
what’s the difference between a shooter and a bullied autistic kid Depends who’s shooting What is the difference between an orphan and a apple? Well at least one gets picked
What’s the difference between Dark humor and Morbid humor? Dark humon is 10 babies in 1 trash can and Morbid humor is 1 baby in 10 trash cans What’s the difference between a pizza and a baby? A pizza dosent scream in the oven.
What’s the difference between that bridge and my will to live? None, they’re both too short.
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