Q: What’s the difference between me and cancer? A: My dad didn’t beat cancer…
What is the difference between a washing machine and a child…? The washing machine doesn’t cry when you put a load in it.
What’s the difference between apple’s and orphans apples actually get picked I made a website for orphans but sadly it didn’t have a home page.
What’s the difference between a refrigerator and a gay guy? You have to ask permission before stuffing it with meat.
What is the difference between a rapist and a dictionary? One of them knows the definition of no.
What do turtles and lesbians have in common they both choke on plastic
What’s the difference betwen a alligator and a crocrodile? One of them you’ll see in a while and the other one you’ll se later
What is the difference between a cat and a complex sentence? – A cat has claws at the end of its paws. A complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.
Q: What is the difference between a stripper and a bungee cord? A: It is cheap fast, and if the rubber breaks, your pretty much screwed.
What’s the difference between a politician and a flying pig? – The letter F.
What’s the difference between you and Hitler? Hitler knew when to kill himself.
People are like potatoes. We may look different, but we all taste the same with a little ketchup.
Two homeless alcoholics want to get drunk but don’t have enough money for even the cheapest drinks in any bar. So one of them devises a clever plan : he tells his friend “We should buy a hot-dog sausage with the last of our money and stick it down my pants, then drink a load of drinks but then when the bill comes you get down and suck on the hot-dog and it’ll look like you’re sucking on my dick so then we’ll get thrown out without paying and we can just go to another bar and do the same thing again”. His friend agrees so they buy the hot-dog, stick it down the first dude’s pants, go to the bar and then the second dude begins to suck on the hot-dog as agreed. They are thrown out and hit another four bars this way. In the end, as they lie drunk on the floor in some alleyway, the second guy says, “Well, what a great night. Free beers in five different bars!” The first guy says “Yeah! Especially since the hot-dog fell out before we even reached the first bar!”
What’s the difference between you and Jesus? Your parents remember Jesus’s birth date
What the difference between a feminist and Hitler? Both were good at starting wars, only difference was Hitler knew when to kill himself afterwards.
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