What’s the difference between a cranky two-year-old and a duckling? – One is a whiny toddler, and the other is a tiny waddler.
Two homeless alcoholics want to get drunk but don’t have enough money for even the cheapest drinks in any bar. So one of them devises a clever plan : he tells his friend “We should buy a hot-dog sausage with the last of our money and stick it down my pants, then drink a load of drinks but then when the bill comes you get down and suck on the hot-dog and it’ll look like you’re sucking on my dick so then we’ll get thrown out without paying and we can just go to another bar and do the same thing again”. His friend agrees so they buy the hot-dog, stick it down the first dude’s pants, go to the bar and then the second dude begins to suck on the hot-dog as agreed. They are thrown out and hit another four bars this way. In the end, as they lie drunk on the floor in some alleyway, the second guy says, “Well, what a great night. Free beers in five different bars!” The first guy says “Yeah! Especially since the hot-dog fell out before we even reached the first bar!”
Whats the difference between a hippie chick and a hockey player? – The hockey player showers after 3 periods.
What is the difference between a washing machine and a child…? The washing machine doesn’t cry when you put a load in it.
What’s the difference between humans and bullets? Humans miss John Lennon
how did riahna know that chris brown was cheating on her…there was a different color of lip stick on his knuckles
What’s the difference between a white and a black fairytale? White begins with, ‘Once upon a time…’, black begins with,’ Y’all motherf……s ain’t gonna believe this sh…’
what is the difference between stephen hawkings and a walkie talkie he doesnt walkie or talkie
Whats the difference between a dead baby in a dumpster and a treasure chest? It’s a suprise when you find the treasure
whats the difference between Chris Brown and Santa. Santa stops at 3 hoes
Whats the difference between a smart blonde and Bigfoot? Bigfoot has been sighted.
Q: What is the difference between a stripper and a bungee cord? A: It is cheap fast, and if the rubber breaks, your pretty much screwed.
What’s the difference between Hitler and a feminist? At least Hitler actually did something
What’s the difference between a battery and my wife? The battery has a positive side
what’s the difference between eggs,and you?eggs get laid,you don’t.
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