Whats the difference batween an onion and a baby. One makes you cry when you cut it up
Whats the difference between a dead baby in a dumpster and a treasure chest? It’s a suprise when you find the treasure
Whats the difference between a school bus and my Dad’s van? Schools buses usually don’t have screaming and crying children
What’s the difference between a Catholic Priest and a pedophile? One is Catholic
what is the difference between a baby and a watermelon, one smashes open when you hit it with a sledge hammer and the other is a water melon
What’s the difference between dark humor and morbid humor? Dark humor would be saying ten babies in one trashcan. Morbid humor would be saying one baby in ten trashcans
3 construction workers where sitting on the bridge that they where building having their lunch break. The first guy says “If I get a vegimite sandwich again I am going to jump off this bridge.” The second guys says “If get a peanut butter sandwich again I am going to jump off this bridge”. The third guy says if I get another strawberry jam sandwich then I am going to jump off this bridge.” The next day the first guy gets a vegimite sandwich, the second guy gets a peanut butter sandwich and the third guy gets a strawberry jam sandwich. All 3 guys jump of the bridge and die. The next day at their funerals the first wife says “If he just told me I would have given him a different sandwich.” The second guys wife says “It is all my fault. If only I knew.” The third wife says “I don’t get it, he makes his own lunch.”
What the difference between a feminist and Hitler? Both were good at starting wars, only difference was Hitler knew when to kill himself afterwards.
What’s the difference between a hamster and a cigarette? They’re both harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire
What’s the Difference between an emo kid and a pack of Oreos. The bar code on the emo kid gets longer everyday.
What’s the difference between a school and a isis military base? Don’t ask me I only fly the drone…
Three Nuns died in a car crash, they went up to heaven at the pearly gates the gate keeper said this really should not have happened so I am going to send you back to earth as different people so tell me who you want to be or look like the first nun said I want to look like Madonna puff,you look like her now and but you can’t use her name And sent her down to earth. The second one said I want to look like Marilyn Monroe he then makes her look like her and sends her down to earth. The third nun I said I want to look like Sarah Pipalini. The gate keeper says to her, Sarah Pipalini who is that? she gives the gate keeper a newspaper article he reads it shakes his head no and says it’s not Sarah Pipalini it Sahara pipeline laid by 500 men.
What’s the difference between light and hard? It’s easy to get to sleep with a light on.
What’s the difference between a gay guy and a microwave? The microwave doesn’t brown the meat.
What the difference between Rubik’s cube and a penis? I don’t know but they both get harder the more you play with them
RUS | ENG
