Whats an orphans dream job? A builder, to build themselves a home.
Last night I had the strangest dream ! I sailed away to China! And I caught the coronavirus! You said you needed to wash your hands! Didn’t want no one else to touch you! What does that mean ?! And you said!! Ain’t nothing gonna break my lungs ? ?! Ain’t no way of slowing Covid down! Oh no I’ve got to keep on coughing!!!
Why do a orphan starts with an “O” because they Only see there parents in their dream.
When I was a little boy I had this dream I was eating a giant marshmallow When I woke I was being sexually abused
An ugly man with a gun walks into a bar. He sees a woman, and falls in love with her. Man: Hey, cute lady! Woman: Leave me alone, you ugly two faced man! I already have a boyfriend. Man: Not for long! And then the man shoots the woman’s boyfriend. Woman: How dare you murder such a beautiful man! Man: Now you shall be my girlfriend. Woman: Never. And then the man takes the seat that the woman’s boyfriend was sitting in before. Man: You look like a dream. Woman: Then open up your ugly eyes and stop sleeping, murder. Man: What’s it like being the most beautiful girl in the world, compared to all those ugly woman? Bleuch! Woman: What’s it like being the ugliest mother f***ing murder in the world, compared to all those beautiful men? And then the man orders flowers and candy. Bartender: We don’t serve flowers, or candy. And the man shoots the bartender. Another man can’t believe what he just saw, so he strangles the first man, and throws him out.
Is that a quirked-up white boi with a little bit of swag, busting it down sexual style? Is HE goated with the sauce?
So i was sitting with my little brother and talk about our dreams. “What do you wanna be when you grow up?” I asked him. He answered “A doctor!”. I wanted to tease him so i said “I wouldn’t be treated by a doctor like you”. I was hoping he would get mad or something but instead, he calmly replied “Brother, i said doctor. Not a vet”
There was once a man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe While dreaming of Venus He played with his penis And awoke with a hand full of goo
Went to the doctor told him Ive been having dreams first about a wigwam then about a teepee he said I was 2 tents
The pope drives around in a glass box or as I like to call him a snipers dream
Jump in the cadillac girl lets put some miles on it
officer, I drop-kicked that child in SELF-DEFENSE! You gotta believe me!
You’re so short, you must need a ladder to reach your advice/dreams.
Why did the plum put sugar under its pillow? So it could have sweet dreams.
just killed a woman feeling good -Tommyinnit
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