If I was an object in this world I’d be a glass! Because if you leave me when I’m too close to the edge I will likely shatter and break. If I was a pizza topping I would be pineapple! Because everybody doubts me. I’m a star! Because one of these days I’m going to crash and burn… If I could choose what creature I come back as after I die I’d be a panda, because people
I was just informed that my ex was stabbed yesterday…lets just say i quit my job as a butcher
My ex got into a bad accident recently. I told the doctors the wrong blood type. Now she will really know what rejection feels like
Roses are red violets are blue were breaking up because I never love you
What’s the difference between depression and your ex? Depression f@cks you harder
what do call an ex lesbian ??? A Clitter Quitter
When your so rich that you can buy anything you end up getting a cow in your living room yeah anyways my ex is still in my living room
What do you call a mix of nuts, bolts, and my ex? A roTHOT
My ex-wife still misses me. But her aim is steadily improving.
What is the difference between a coconut and your ex? One is fun to knock down by throwing rocks at the other one is a coconut.
My Ex wife still misses me, but her aim is getting better! Gravity Falls Suckers
I was in a toxic relationship . After some time my girlfriend died, her name was happy . Still got no clue of her body and here i am lying on the bed so f@cking happy.
So 3 guys are walking down the street together and decide to go rob a bank. The first one goes for the richest man in the city’s vault but can’t open it easily, and is caught and sent to death in jail for robbing the richest man. The second one goes for his uncles vault because screw that son of a bh he’s rich why does he need all the money. But his uncle was unfortunately at the vault that day and snapped his nephews neck. The third one went for his ex’s vault and thought “well that bh can suck my dk she’s so poor anyway who would care if I take all her money so she dies of hunger and dehydration and homelessness” so he managed to get into her vault easily because it wasn’t heavily locked and took all her money. The next day the third guys ex showed up to his house and said “imma fg murder you” so she shot him dead and got her money from his house. In hell the three guys see each other and explain what happened. The third guy did and then asked “you know I don’t get it. If the richest guys are heavily guarded but already have so much money in their house why does it need to be heavily guarded? I don’t understand why the poorer aren’t heavily guarded when they are so poor they need the money.” And the first guy said “bh I don’t know maybe the bank tellers think poor people should suck it and just die already”
What do you call lesbians having sex? My cheating dyke ex wife!
Build your ex a fire and their warm for a day. Set you ex on fire and hide the smile/evidence
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