My girlfriend broke up with me today but it’s ok, She said we can still be cousins.
My ex-wife still misses me… BUT HER AIM IS GETTIN BETTER!
I was hunting at night for deer and then I found one and shot it, I realized the deer I shot was actually my ex…
Ex: baby i miss u me: sorry i cant talk im at a funeral Ex: who died?! me: my feelings 4 u bitch
i was hit by a car later my ex lost her bus job
How did Helen Keller die? Her ex gave her plutonium and told her to eat it
MY GIRLFRIEND BROKE UP WITH ME YESTERDAY. i ASKED HER WHY. sHE SAID, BECAUSE YOU’RE A PEDOPHILE. I REPLIED, “PEDOPHILE! THAT’S A BIG WORD FOR AN EIGHT YEAR OLD.” I had the WORST day ever. My ex was sent to the hospital from a gun, and I got my hunting license removed.
Today my EX got trampled by a bunch of horse and sadly I lost my job as a horse trainer.
So my ex invited me to dinner with her new boyfriend. Her boyfriend said “hi.” I said, " knife to meet you."
It’s been a terrible day today my ex got hit by a bus and died. Not only this but the council cut my bus drivers permit
Me:Whats that sound? Ex:What? Me:oh its the elevator going up. BYEEEE see you on another level!
On my signal, I would like you to drive onto the pavement (sidewalk) and run over my ex-wife.
Today was the worst day ever. My Ex got hit by a truck… On the plus side my truck doesn’t even have a dent.
i got hit by a bus but the bus was my ex
I was just informed that my ex was stabbed yesterday…lets just say i quit my job as a butcher
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