Ex jokes

I have an exam next week so I called my ex and asked if she had any cheating tips

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How did Helen Keller die? Her ex gave her plutonium and told her to eat it

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i was hit by a car later my ex lost her bus job

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I had a horrible nightmare yesterday. I was in room filled with all of my ex’s, so I was completely alone.

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What’s the difference between depression and your ex? Depression f@cks you harder

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if u tell a girl there pretty they wont believe u if u tell them their ugly their never forget it… elephants never forget.

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My ex still misses me… But her aim is getting better every time!

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A guy goes into his attic to clean it out and finds an old oil lamp. He thinks he could sell it instead of throwing it away, so he starts to rub it and out pops this genie. The genie says to him " Thank you for awakening me, I can grant you three wishes as a token of my gratitude." The guy wishes for a billion dollars, the genie grants it. The guy then asks for a huge mansion with 2 Lamborghinis and 2 Ferraris, the genie grants it. The genie says “This is your last wish so really make this one count.” The guys says “Well I’ve always wanted to drive out to hawaiian islands, because airplanes scare me to death, so I would want a highway that could stretch from here all the way to the islands.” The Genie says “That is asking for quite a lot and I’m not sure if I can pull that off, Is there anything else you’d want?” The guy says "Well I’ve been married and divorced three times, and I just can’t understand what I’ve been doing wrong. I’ve given my ex-wives all the love and care that I could but in the end it was never enough. I would want to have the ability to understand women. The genie thinks for a few moments and says “Do you want a three or four lane highway?”

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i got hit by a bus but the bus was my ex

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Can’t anyone relate to this? BEAT WATERSHARKY!!! -Oops!-By- Air Attack Productions and Yung Gravy-Ayy, supercalifragilisticexpiali dope shit Supercalifragi lick my ex be on some ho shit Superman, I get dem bands but ain’t gon’ buy you roses Super-duper get them cougars, took my wrist and froze it Super-duper hoes Y’all got Oompa Loompa hoes

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the last thing i told my ex after we broke up was “at least we’re still cousins”??

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My ex died in an anchorage accident. She always was a sleeping hooker.

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some guy was mad at his ex wife! so he threw a bottle of alcohol into her house when he was drunk. And realized when he was being questioned for arson, his cigarette was in the rim of the bottle.

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Today was the worst day ever. My Ex got hit by a truck… On the plus side my truck doesn’t even have a dent.

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One day someones ex was going to the kitchen to get something to eat and her ex boyfriend was there and gave her an apple next minute she had clamydia. What did the boyfriend do?

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