Ex jokes

My ex got hit by a bus yesterday.i nearly lost my job

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My ex is like aids!!! I can’t get rid of him How am I an ableist? My ex girlfriend was in a wheelchair and we lived in the same old building with a broken elevator. I ended the relationship by moving to 8th floor.

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My ex boyfriend’s dick is so small that instead of giving him a handjob I had to give him a thumb and forefinger job.

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My ex-wife still misses me… BUT HER AIM IS GETTIN BETTER!

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My ex was so full of shit,she probably poured toilet cleaner in her nose to get relief.

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Ex Of Johnnys: I have a question. Johnny:What? Ex Of Johnnys: Am I pretty? Johnny: Yes ofc jesus mad everbody wonderfully! Ex: Awhh! Johnny: But who ever made you was painting tomas the train while making your face.

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I lost my drivers license today i hit my ex with my car

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What do you call a mix of nuts, bolts, and my ex? A roTHOT

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My ex still misses me… But her aim is getting better every time!

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What does an astronaut call his ex from space? SpaceX

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I had a horrible nightmare yesterday. I was in room filled with all of my ex’s, so I was completely alone.

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A FED EX plane was carrying 375 fridges across Africa but the cargo door wasn’t shut properly but only 218 reached the desired destination. The rest landed in a remote village. How many fell out the plane? Time’s up! You took too long you only had 4 seconds to answer it. How do you put an elephant into the fridge that pushed out the cargo door? Open the fridge, put the elephant in and close the door. How do you put a giraffe into the fridge? Open the fridge, take out the elephant. Then put in the giraffe and close the door. Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she got hit by the other 156 refrigerators. How did she survive? Her idiot mother tried to pull her out and accidentally ripped both her arms off. But she was rescued 8 minutes later.

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What is the difference between a coconut and your ex? One is fun to knock down by throwing rocks at the other one is a coconut.

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ex-bf’s gf: your so ugly as hell me: oh did I mention that i was trying to be you

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My ex-wife was smoking pot with Snow White, when the 7 dwarf’s saw them they sang… “Look at those high Ho’s! Hiiiiiiii Hoooooo’sssss!!!”

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