MY GIRLFRIEND BROKE UP WITH ME YESTERDAY. i ASKED HER WHY. sHE SAID, BECAUSE YOU’RE A PEDOPHILE. I REPLIED, “PEDOPHILE! THAT’S A BIG WORD FOR AN EIGHT YEAR OLD.” I had the WORST day ever. My ex was sent to the hospital from a gun, and I got my hunting license removed.
Ex: baby i miss u me: sorry i cant talk im at a funeral Ex: who died?! me: my feelings 4 u bitch
Roses are red violets are blue were breaking up because I never love you
My ex misses me, good thing she’ll never hit me.
I went to a stand up show with the person who made my like a joke
I hate family reunions I see too many of my ex’s there
I was just informed that my ex was stabbed yesterday…lets just say i quit my job as a butcher
What do you call a mix of nuts, bolts, and my ex? A roTHOT
I took my son to a drivers school and am surprised because he got his license but soon lost the privilege to drive htm title=' (I gotta go pay him out of jail)'>a car because he ran over my ex on “accident” (I gotta go pay him out of jail)
Ex Of Johnnys: I have a question. Johnny:What? Ex Of Johnnys: Am I pretty? Johnny: Yes ofc jesus mad everbody wonderfully! Ex: Awhh! Johnny: But who ever made you was painting tomas the train while making your face.
How did Helen Keller die? Her ex gave her plutonium and told her to eat it
What has two legs, two arms, one dead and covered in red? My ex wife. So my ex who wouldn’t leave me alone because she thought I was the best person in the world even though will has a better haircut then me but anyway when we broke up she said I was the worst person she ever met and I told her she looks like a cross between a beaver and a mole rat. Then I told her she has the wendys logo haircut and then some other things I’m not gonna say. 2 years of bullshit I was done Anyways she cried lol
Today was the worst day ever. My Ex got hit by a truck… On the plus side my truck doesn’t even have a dent.
I was hunting at night for deer and then I found one and shot it, I realized the deer I shot was actually my ex…
2 friends are talking and the one says, “I had a good day today, I ran into my ex.” The other guy replies, “How is that good?” The Friend says, “I was in my car.”
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