Ex jokes

Me:Whats that sound? Ex:What? Me:oh its the elevator going up. BYEEEE see you on another level!

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On my signal, I would like you to drive onto the pavement (sidewalk) and run over my ex-wife.

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what do call an ex lesbian ??? A Clitter Quitter

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Build your ex a fire and their warm for a day. Set you ex on fire and hide the smile/evidence

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What has two legs, two arms, one dead and covered in red? My ex wife. So my ex who wouldn’t leave me alone because she thought I was the best person in the world even though will has a better haircut then me but anyway when we broke up she said I was the worst person she ever met and I told her she looks like a cross between a beaver and a mole rat. Then I told her she has the wendys logo haircut and then some other things I’m not gonna say. 2 years of bullshit I was done Anyways she cried lol

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My ex got hit by a bus yesterday.i nearly lost my job

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the last thing i told my ex after we broke up was “at least we’re still cousins”??

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I was hunting at night for deer and then I found one and shot it, I realized the deer I shot was actually my ex…

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I hate family reunions I see too many of my ex’s there

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A guy goes into his attic to clean it out and finds an old oil lamp. He thinks he could sell it instead of throwing it away, so he starts to rub it and out pops this genie. The genie says to him " Thank you for awakening me, I can grant you three wishes as a token of my gratitude." The guy wishes for a billion dollars, the genie grants it. The guy then asks for a huge mansion with 2 Lamborghinis and 2 Ferraris, the genie grants it. The genie says “This is your last wish so really make this one count.” The guys says “Well I’ve always wanted to drive out to hawaiian islands, because airplanes scare me to death, so I would want a highway that could stretch from here all the way to the islands.” The Genie says “That is asking for quite a lot and I’m not sure if I can pull that off, Is there anything else you’d want?” The guy says "Well I’ve been married and divorced three times, and I just can’t understand what I’ve been doing wrong. I’ve given my ex-wives all the love and care that I could but in the end it was never enough. I would want to have the ability to understand women. The genie thinks for a few moments and says “Do you want a three or four lane highway?”

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Today my EX got trampled by a bunch of horse and sadly I lost my job as a horse trainer.

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So a girl says to her ex I can’t get you out of my mind the boyfriend I knew you we’ve the girl replies I see you in everything like htm title=' even at work like trash cans are everywhere'>when I’m walking down the street even at work like trash cans are everywhere

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I was in a toxic relationship . After some time my girlfriend died, her name was happy . Still got no clue of her body and here i am lying on the bed so f@cking happy.

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What does an astronaut call his ex from space? SpaceX

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I went to a stand up show with the person who made my like a joke

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