if u tell a girl there pretty they wont believe u if u tell them their ugly their never forget it… elephants never forget.
Peanuts are hard to crack just like my ex wifes heart
Ex: baby i miss u me: sorry i cant talk im at a funeral Ex: who died?! me: my feelings 4 u bitch
MY GIRLFRIEND BROKE UP WITH ME YESTERDAY. i ASKED HER WHY. sHE SAID, BECAUSE YOU’RE A PEDOPHILE. I REPLIED, “PEDOPHILE! THAT’S A BIG WORD FOR AN EIGHT YEAR OLD.” I had the WORST day ever. My ex was sent to the hospital from a gun, and I got my hunting license removed.
My girlfriend broke up with me today but it’s ok, She said we can still be cousins.
What’s the difference between depression and your ex? Depression f@cks you harder
I hate family reunions I see too many of my ex’s there
A guy walks into a bar with a revolver and yells, “WHO THE F*** F***ED MY WIFE!” A man in the back responds, “YOU AINT GOT ENOUGH BULLETS MATE!” A friend of mine just got divorced. He and his ex-wife split the house. He got the outside.
What do you call a mix of nuts, bolts, and my ex? A roTHOT
My ex still misses me… But her aim is getting better every time!
Today was a bad day. First My ex got hit by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver
What do you call lesbians having sex? My cheating dyke ex wife!
My ex got into a bad accident recently. I told the doctors the wrong blood type. Now she will really know what rejection feels like
What do you call a cow with three legs? My ex
Granny’s says. don’t worry the crys of pain are only my ex husbands
RUS | ENG