Ex jokes

What did the snail say to his ex-wife? I’m still leaving you!

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My ex got into a bad accident recently. I told the doctors the wrong blood type. Now she will really know what rejection feels like

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some guy was mad at his ex wife! so he threw a bottle of alcohol into her house when he was drunk. And realized when he was being questioned for arson, his cigarette was in the rim of the bottle.

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I was walking down the street when i thought i smelled my ex’s perfume, turns out i was standing in front of a fish market.

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Fruit is like ex-wives. They both look really good hanging from a tree.

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My ex-wife was deaf. She left me for a deaf friend of hers. To be honest, I should have seen the signs.

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Me:Whats that sound? Ex:What? Me:oh its the elevator going up. BYEEEE see you on another level!

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Today was a bad day. First My ex got hit by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver

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