Ex jokes

What did the snail say to his ex-wife? I’m still leaving you!

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some guy was mad at his ex wife! so he threw a bottle of alcohol into her house when he was drunk. And realized when he was being questioned for arson, his cigarette was in the rim of the bottle.

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One day someones ex was going to the kitchen to get something to eat and her ex boyfriend was there and gave her an apple next minute she had clamydia. What did the boyfriend do?

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A guy walks into a bar with a revolver and yells, “WHO THE F*** F***ED MY WIFE!” A man in the back responds, “YOU AINT GOT ENOUGH BULLETS MATE!” A friend of mine just got divorced. He and his ex-wife split the house. He got the outside.

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A FED EX plane was carrying 375 fridges across Africa but the cargo door wasn’t shut properly but only 218 reached the desired destination. The rest landed in a remote village. How many fell out the plane? Time’s up! You took too long you only had 4 seconds to answer it. How do you put an elephant into the fridge that pushed out the cargo door? Open the fridge, put the elephant in and close the door. How do you put a giraffe into the fridge? Open the fridge, take out the elephant. Then put in the giraffe and close the door. Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she got hit by the other 156 refrigerators. How did she survive? Her idiot mother tried to pull her out and accidentally ripped both her arms off. But she was rescued 8 minutes later.

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ex-bf’s gf: your so ugly as hell me: oh did I mention that i was trying to be you

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What do you call lesbians having sex? My cheating dyke ex wife!

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I love breakups, my ex-girlfriends always end up in pieces.

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I’ve been looking for my ex girlfriend’s killer for the past two years. But no one would do it.

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Fruit is like ex-wives. They both look really good hanging from a tree.

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I love to have sex and my name is lex which one should i be with next i really hate my ex i just saw a huge t rex and i think you probably saw this text Welcome for the rhyme

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Girlfriend: you remind me of a cellphone Ex Boyfriend: how and why? Girlfriend: Because your about to die

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what do call an ex lesbian ??? A Clitter Quitter

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I have an exam next week so I called my ex and asked if she had any cheating tips

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What do you call a mix of nuts, bolts, and my ex? A roTHOT

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