My ex misses me, good thing she’ll never hit me.
one day my ex best friend lied about his computer died when he left the call and watched youtube
What do the twin towers and my ex-girlfriend have in common? They both went down on my dad.
2 friends are talking and the one says, “I had a good day today, I ran into my ex.” The other guy replies, “How is that good?” The Friend says, “I was in my car.”
if u tell a girl there pretty they wont believe u if u tell them their ugly their never forget it… elephants never forget.
What is the difference between a coconut and your ex? One is fun to knock down by throwing rocks at the other one is a coconut.
the last thing i told my ex after we broke up was “at least we’re still cousins”??
My Ex wife still misses me, but her aim is getting better! Gravity Falls Suckers
Today was the worst day ever. My Ex got hit by a truck… On the plus side my truck doesn’t even have a dent.
I had a horrible nightmare yesterday. I was in room filled with all of my ex’s, so I was completely alone.
What has two legs, two arms, one dead and covered in red? My ex wife. So my ex who wouldn’t leave me alone because she thought I was the best person in the world even though will has a better haircut then me but anyway when we broke up she said I was the worst person she ever met and I told her she looks like a cross between a beaver and a mole rat. Then I told her she has the wendys logo haircut and then some other things I’m not gonna say. 2 years of bullshit I was done Anyways she cried lol
Girlfriend: you remind me of a cellphone Ex Boyfriend: how and why? Girlfriend: Because your about to die
I wish my ex wife would take me back. :(
My ex still misses me… But her aim is getting better every time!
So my ex invited me to dinner with her new boyfriend. Her boyfriend said “hi.” I said, " knife to meet you."
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