Family jokes

I haven’t talked to my wife in three weeks. – I didn’t want to interrupt her. A female class teacher was having a problem with a boy in her class in Grade 3… The boy said, “Madam, I should be in Grade 4. I am smarter than my sister & she’s in Grade 4”. The Madam had heard enough and took the boy to the principal.The principal decided to test the boy with some

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Girl: How do you feel about abortion? Dad: Ask your sister Girl: I don’t have a …

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I was watching my daughter at a park she was playing with a few people another parent came up to me and said which was is yours, just for fun i said “i am still choosing” she looked horrified

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My friend got mad when he caught me smelling his sister’s panties. I don’t know why he was mad, maybe because she was wearimg them, or because his whole family was watching. Either way it made the funeral a bit awkward.

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Whats the difference between a school bus and my Dad’s van? Schools buses usually don’t have screaming and crying children

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5 4 3 2 1. A castle ways a ton. 5 4 3 2 1. The Queen of England’s won. I never thought she’d get it done, but her sister is a nun.

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You wanna know what i want for Christmas? My dad to come back with the milk he said he was gonna get.

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So a daughter asks her father “dad what is you opinion on abortions?” So her father says why don’t you ask your sister. The daughter responds “but I don’t have a sister… Oh”

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Me and my friend went to the park, after a while we grabbed our little princess and said “it’s time to go sweetie” but before we could go someone said “stop them they have my daughter!”

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Why can’t orphans go to daughter and dad dance night they don’t have a dad to go with.

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Daughter: I know this is weird but I feel like that someone is watching me when I am sleeping. Father: Sorry

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What did Luke Skywalker say when he saw someone bullying his sister? You better not Leia finger on her!

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Son: Dad, why did name my sister Paris? Dad: Because she was made there. Son: Thanks, Dad. Dad: You’re welcome, Backseat.

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So my dad said to me and my sister don’t fight but did he mean “fist fight” or “yelling fight?”

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You want to hear a dirty joke? This guy and this girl were having sex when the guys boss called to ask why he wasn’t at work. The guy responds, "I’m sick" His boss replies, "you don’t sound sick" The guy says, “I’m f@cking my sister” and hangs up the phone

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