I’ll never forget my sister’s last word. “Is it edible?”
The doctor told me I had aids I said it’s your fault sister.
My dad is like Hurricane Katrina. I haven’t seen either sense 2005
My mum told me to stop playing with my sister; she said at least wait for her to be born first.
Little Johnny’s mom is taking a shower little Johnny walks in and asks what is that in between your legs mommy says that is my keyhole the next day little Johnny sees his dad taking a shower and little Johnny asks what is that in between your legs daddy says that is my key the next day little Johnny says to his dad looks like the neighbor has the key to mommy’s keyhole too. By:Xzavier
Q: What’s the difference between me and cancer? A: My dad didn’t beat cancer…
my mom said to take out the trash bags so i did and the next day my mom asked “where are your sisters?” i said “in line to get crushed”
What does a dad and the Twin Towers have in common? Once they’re gone they never come back.
Guys my sisters pregnant! Im finally a dad!
A grandfather is on his rocking chair. His grandson comes to him asks him to croak, to which the grandfather responds with a “no”. His granddaughter then comes along and asks him to croak, to which the grandfather responds, “Why do you keep asking me to croak?” The granddaughter replies, “Because Dad says if you do, we get to go to Disneyland.”
Son : "Dad, Are we pyromaniacs ?" Dad : "Yes, we arson
Dad: What time do u wanna go to the dentist? Daughter: tooth hurty Dad: all right
Orphan boy:Your dad is probably dissapointed of you i mean look at you Me: well at least my parents kept me wheres yours
What do you call a boomerang that never comes back? Daddy
Daughter: I know this is weird but I feel like that someone is watching me when I am sleeping. Father: Sorry
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