Family jokes

My Mom said: I have a daughter that killed herself for getting bullied. Well i said: Have you seen her?

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I haven’t talked to my wife in three weeks. – I didn’t want to interrupt her. A female class teacher was having a problem with a boy in her class in Grade 3… The boy said, “Madam, I should be in Grade 4. I am smarter than my sister & she’s in Grade 4”. The Madam had heard enough and took the boy to the principal.The principal decided to test the boy with some

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A little girl said to her mom "MOM MY BUTTS CRACKED KISS IT KISS IT"her mom said “sweetie SHUT UP ITS ALWAYS BEEN THERE” then her daughter died cuz of her melodramaticness.

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Why did the Santa go to work because he was just trying out the work ????

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To All The Naruto Fans: sharingan is red rasengan are blue if you dare touch my daughter ill chidori you

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my mom said to take out the trash bags so i did and the next day my mom asked “where are your sisters?” i said “in line to get crushed”

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What did the paintings name their daughter? Palette

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My friend Jimmy said his dad is exactly like Santa, I asked “Why is it because he gives people presents?” Jimmy told me “No it’s because I hear so many good things about him but and how he’s gonna come home, but never see him.”

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My dad is like my virginity. I lost him at 12

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You have to do this and my sister said well I don’t care and I said well you care enough to respond back oh my gosh.

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Little Sally found out that she had hair on her private area and whent up to her mom and asked “mom I have hair on my privates,what is it?” “OH honey thats your monkey.” The mom says So little Sally runs up to her big sister and says “my monkey has hair on it” so the sister replies with a laugh "you think thats cool my monkey is already eating bananas

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What do you call you’re daughter’s boyfriend when he brings her back past 10pm? An ambulance

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The last words my Dad spoke before he passed was, “Honey put down the knife we were only talking about getting a divorce.”

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My daughter is the most adorable little girl in the world. She’s got my sister’s eyes.

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How do you circumcise someone from Alabama? Kick his sisters jaw

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