Fire jokes

My school is fire today and I pushed a kid in a wheelchair down the stairs and shouted HOT WHEELS

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I was told to burn calories so I threw your mom in the fire.

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yo mama so stupid that she got fired from the M&M factory for throwing away all the W’s

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i use to work at a calendar factory but i got fired because i missed a few days

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What is black and sits at the top of the stairs? – Steven Hawking after a house fire.

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Why did the little boy cross the road multiple times? He stepped on an IED after being mutilated on a chopping block that was on fire with a table saw and multiple gallows which were infested with flaming termites with splotches of blood all over him from his eyes after they were squashed with a brick.

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The only thing brighter than my future is the fire on the world trade center.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Sunflowers are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN’S ON FIRE

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Q. Two gay guys are having sex, when suddenly the house catches fire. Who gets out of the house first, the guy on top or bottom? A. They guy on the bottom because he already has his shit packed.

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Q: How do you make a 9/11 cocktail? A: Light two Manhattans on fire and then knock them over.

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Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me I ain’t the sharpest tool in the shed She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb In the shape of an “L” on her forehead Well, the years start coming and they don’t stop coming Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running Didn’t make sense not to live for fun Your brain gets smart but your

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Are you the Lusitania cos i wanna fire a torpedo into you

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There are some sounds that everyone loves… Shoes on gravel Crackling of fire The snapping necks of those who think they can disrespect you Cats purring

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I refuse to believe my dad got fired as a road worker for theft. But when I came home there were signs everywhere

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What do you call Stephan hawkings on fire HOT WHEELS

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