Fire jokes

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Did you know that Former Australian Prime Minister Scott Morrison was a firefighter? He got fired for trying to fight a fire with tickets to Hawaii.

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My doctor told me that I had to burn calories, so I took a fat kid and lit them on fire

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What’s Black and sits at the top of the stairs? Stephen Hawkins in a house fire.

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ROBERT LEWANDISNEY SONG Give me freedom Give me fire Give me contract Or I retire Jog all day Out of UCL now FC Barcelona I need you now Villarreal defenders They surround me Big submarines All around me I get upset Call my agent I want money I’m impatient

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What do you call an emo kid playing with fire? Forgot to clean little piece of dust.

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Why Was The Blonde Fired From The M&M Factory? For Throwing Out the W’s A missionary was caught by cannibals. we was tied up and thrown into a big pot. The cannibals were chopping up vegetables and throwing them into the pot with the missionary. When they lit the fire under the pot, the missionary said, “You can’t stew me. I’m a friar.”

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What do Marshall Tucker Band and Kobe Bryant have in common? Their last big hit was “Fire on the Mountain”

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Michael Jackson was once a guitar teacher, but he got fired because he fingered a minor

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A kid is arrested for a school shooting threat he is then apprehended and asked why he wanted to do this. He responds with “what do you mean I already did it” then the police ran back to the school to aprehend the other people he was planing it with the cops busted in through the doors which caused a smoke trap to go off which then the cops saw three people walk in and the police begin to fire. But as the smoke began to clear the cops saw that the three people were 16 kids duck taped to rolling poles 4 per pole. Back to the station holding the kid being apprehended. the kid puts his feet up on a chair and said “Aww it pays to be lazy!”

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When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat children into the fire.

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What is black and sits at the top of the stairs? – Steven Hawking after a house fire.

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Man: I got fired from my job at the calander factory. Lady: What did you do? Man: I took a day of…

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