Fire jokes

Why did the guitarist get fired as a carpenter? He was shredding the floor…

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(I want to apologize in advance. These are very dark jokes) What’s red and bad for your teeth? A brick I was going to tell a dead baby joke. But I decided to abort. Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle? His wife is dead. 4.Why does Helen Keller hate porcupines? They’re painful to look at. Why can’t orphans play baseball? They don’t know where home is. Give a man a match, and he’ll be warm for a few hours. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life. I asked a pretty, young homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled at me and said yes. The look on her face soon changed, however, when I walked off with her cardboard box. My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children. If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.

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I pushed a kid on a wheelchair into the school fire and said “hot wheels”

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I was told to burn calories so I threw your mom in the fire.

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Father : I don’t trust you, You poured your seed in my daughter’s belly,. Son : But Paah you can’t fire me. Father: You’re lucky you’re my brother too or I’d kill you.

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My little cousin’s birthday was in a few days and his mom said he wanted Hot Wheels. So I sent him a video of me pushing a paralyzed kid into fire and screaming “HOT WHEELS!”

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“Sanderson, fire a warning shot.” “Uhh sir, this is an M32 rotary grenade launcher.” “Ah potato-potato, just pull the trigger.”

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ROBERT LEWANDISNEY SONG Give me freedom Give me fire Give me contract Or I retire Jog all day Out of UCL now FC Barcelona I need you now Villarreal defenders They surround me Big submarines All around me I get upset Call my agent I want money I’m impatient

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whats black and sits at the top of the stairs? stephen hawkings during a house fire.

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What do you call an emo kid playing with fire? Forgot to clean little piece of dust.

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What do you call Stephen HAawking on fire Hot wheels

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My aunt worked as a human cannon ball I’m not sure if she was good at it until she got fired

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I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire today. Now they call him Hot Wheels.

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i use to work at a calendar factory but i got fired because i missed a few days

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What do you call a red neck on fire. A fire cracker

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