Fire jokes

My school is fire today and I pushed a kid in a wheelchair down the stairs and shouted HOT WHEELS

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ROBERT LEWANDISNEY SONG Give me freedom Give me fire Give me contract Or I retire Jog all day Out of UCL now FC Barcelona I need you now Villarreal defenders They surround me Big submarines All around me I get upset Call my agent I want money I’m impatient

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Three unlucky jungle explorers were captured by a band of cannibals. Whilst being tied to three respective stakes, the chieftain announces that the hapless adventurers were about to die. “After you’re dead, you’ll be skinned. The skin will be used to increase our canoe armada, and the rest of you will be food for us and our families.” This announcement

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“Sanderson, fire a warning shot.” “Uhh sir, this is an M32 rotary grenade launcher.” “Ah potato-potato, just pull the trigger.”

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What’s the difference between a Cop and a bullet? When a bullet kills someone it gets fired. I usually dont make 9/11 jokes. But they just are fire.

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I love fire. My friends love it too. When i set them on fire, they run around and scream. They sometimes get so tired they immediately fall asleep forever. Also, they need a shower.

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I had a friend who was a deep sleeper. One day, a fire started in his house. Now he’s a really deep sleeper.

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I pushed an orphan in a wheelchair into a fire and yelled hot wheels

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There are some sounds that everyone loves… Shoes on gravel Crackling of fire The snapping necks of those who think they can disrespect you Cats purring

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What are so special about bullets ? :- They do work after they are fired

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a man got fired from the first coin factory. he exclaimed “no! this is the only thing thats ever made cents!!”

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Michael Jackson was once a guitar teacher, but he got fired because he fingered a minor

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I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire today. Now they call him Hot Wheels.

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One man was very depressed cause he lost everything. He lost his job. He lost his home and he lost his wife. So he went lonely into the forest to grief. Suddenly with the head rise up he sees Santa Claus walking by. - Santa? he asks. ‘Why are you early, it is not even christmas?’ ho, ho. Don’t worry about me. Lets worry about you instead’ says Santa. What is the problem my friend?’ I lost everything good in my life. I got fired from my job. My wife divorced me. I lost my house." Santa: I can help you. You can wish three things you want in life and i’ll give it to you-" Man: My first wish is i want my house back. Santa: Done! Man: My second wish is i want 1 million amount of cash in my bank account. Santa: Done! Man: My third wish is i also want my job back! Santa: Done, but before i actually give you those wishes, I haft to hump you. Man: Okey. Lets do it. So the Santa claus takes of his pants to hump the man. After they are done humping the santa ask the man: -How old are you? Man: I am 35 years old. Santa: And still believe in Santa Claus??!! HOHOHOHO!!!

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whats black and sits at the top of the stairs? stephen hawkings during a house fire.

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