Fire jokes

What do you call an emo kid playing with fire? Forgot to clean little piece of dust.

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Q. Two gay guys are having sex, when suddenly the house catches fire. Who gets out of the house first, the guy on top or bottom? A. They guy on the bottom because he already has his shit packed.

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Did you know that Former Australian Prime Minister Scott Morrison was a firefighter? He got fired for trying to fight a fire with tickets to Hawaii.

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Father : I don’t trust you, You poured your seed in my daughter’s belly,. Son : But Paah you can’t fire me. Father: You’re lucky you’re my brother too or I’d kill you.

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I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire today. Now they call him Hot Wheels.

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I live next to a kindergarten and yesterday they had a fire drill. It was kinda weird because normally it’s me who has a drill around little children.

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whats the difference between a bear with a gun and an American Man with a gun? The bear has common sense not to fire it

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wood fired pizza how would pizza get a job now

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A kid is arrested for a school shooting threat he is then apprehended and asked why he wanted to do this. He responds with “what do you mean I already did it” then the police ran back to the school to aprehend the other people he was planing it with the cops busted in through the doors which caused a smoke trap to go off which then the cops saw three people walk in and the police begin to fire. But as the smoke began to clear the cops saw that the three people were 16 kids duck taped to rolling poles 4 per pole. Back to the station holding the kid being apprehended. the kid puts his feet up on a chair and said “Aww it pays to be lazy!”

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My aunt worked as a human cannon ball I’m not sure if she was good at it until she got fired

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Q: Why did the chef get fired? A: He took cooking advice from Hitler!

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wood fired pizza? hows pizza gonna pay child support now?! :O please drop a like

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Why did the little girl’s ice cream melt? She was on fire.

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What’s Black and sits at the top of the stairs? Stephen Hawkins in a house fire.

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whats black and sits at the top of the stairs? stephen hawkings during a house fire.

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