your breath is so hot it mad the chicgo fire.
my friend was in a wheel chair so i rolled him in fire now i call him hot wheels
Why did the little boy cross the road multiple times? He stepped on an IED after being mutilated on a chopping block that was on fire with a table saw and multiple gallows which were infested with flaming termites with splotches of blood all over him from his eyes after they were squashed with a brick.
Q: Why did the chef get fired? A: He took cooking advice from Hitler!
Why did the man put himself on fire? To BURN Calories.
Did you know that Former Australian Prime Minister Scott Morrison was a firefighter? He got fired for trying to fight a fire with tickets to Hawaii.
I refuse to believe my dad got fired as a road worker for theft. But when I came home there were signs everywhere
I got suspended at school today, I lit a kids wheelchair on fire and called him hot wheels
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be Wanted. Why are orphans bad at poker? They don’t know what a full house is. I saw a child crying yesterday so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage. What do you call an orphan’s family reunion? Me time. Did you know? The letter ‘f’ in orphan stands for family. What is an orphan’s least favorite song? We are Family. What’s an orphan’s least favorite tv show? Family Guy. What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? Meet the Parents. What’s an orphan’s least favorite type of music? House. Next: Inappropriate Jokes What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot. What’s an orphan’s favorite band? Foster the People. What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan. Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms What beer do orphans drink? Foster’s. Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk. What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it’s the only love they get. Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away? Me: Your parents.
What’s the difference between a skeleton and a baby? I don’t set the skeleton on fire.
Are you a fire alarm because your loud and annoying
What’s the difference between a hamster and a cigarette? They’re both harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire
Three unlucky jungle explorers were captured by a band of cannibals. Whilst being tied to three respective stakes, the chieftain announces that the hapless adventurers were about to die. “After you’re dead, you’ll be skinned. The skin will be used to increase our canoe armada, and the rest of you will be food for us and our families.” This announcement
Q: How do you make a 9/11 cocktail? A: Light two Manhattans on fire and then knock them over.
What do you call a red neck on fire. A fire cracker
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