Fire jokes

What’s the difference between a Cop and a bullet? When a bullet kills someone it gets fired. I usually dont make 9/11 jokes. But they just are fire.

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What are so special about bullets ? :- They do work after they are fired

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I got a job at a library once, i got fired like an hour in because the library manager said that the cookbooks didn’t go into the women’s sports section.

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Chuck Norris can make a fire with two ice cubes

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What’s Black and sits at the top of the stairs? Stephen Hawkins in a house fire.

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ROBERT LEWANDISNEY SONG Give me freedom Give me fire Give me contract Or I retire Jog all day Out of UCL now FC Barcelona I need you now Villarreal defenders They surround me Big submarines All around me I get upset Call my agent I want money I’m impatient

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Are you the Lusitania cos i wanna fire a torpedo into you

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School was fun but it was hard almost like riding a bike that’s on fire and the grounds on fire and everything’s on fire because it’s hell.

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I was about to change my password to fire-fist ace… but apparently it was too weak.

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I bought a gun from Walmart today. I guess they knew what I was going to do with it, because when I pulled the gun on the cashier, I realized the firing mechanism was in reverse.

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Q: Why did the chef get fired? A: He took cooking advice from Hitler!

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What do you call a retard in a house fire? Flame Retardant

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my friend committed suicide yesterday…at least he went out with a bang

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Man: I got fired from my job at the calander factory. Lady: What did you do? Man: I took a day of…

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why was michael jackson fired as a guitar teacher because he fingerd a minor

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