Fire jokes

I refuse to believe my dad got fired as a road worker for theft. But when I came home there were signs everywhere

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I had a friend who was a deep sleeper. One day, a fire started in his house. Now he’s a really deep sleeper.

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What’s the difference between a hamster and a cigarette? They’re both harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire

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wood fired pizza how would pizza get a job now

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There are some sounds that everyone loves… Shoes on gravel Crackling of fire The snapping necks of those who think they can disrespect you Cats purring

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whats black and sits at the top of the stairs? stephen hawkings during a house fire.

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When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat children into the fire.

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Michael Jackson was once a guitar teacher, but he got fired because he fingered a minor

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Once upon a time, there were three kingdoms, all bordering on the same lake. For centuries, these kingdoms had fought over an island in the middle of that lake. One day, they decided to have it out, once and for all. The first kingdom was quite rich, and sent an army of 25 knights, each with three squires. The night before the battle, the knights jousted

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What does a cigarette and a hamster have in common? Both are completely harmless untill you put it in your mouth and light it on fire.

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Father : I don’t trust you, You poured your seed in my daughter’s belly,. Son : But Paah you can’t fire me. Father: You’re lucky you’re my brother too or I’d kill you.

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Jim and Allyn are 2 mates in the Air Force. They were paired up for a training exersice. They got up into the air and Jim said, “okay Allyn, your helmet can control the missile when launched from the jet. Go ahead and test fire a missile and aim it at anything you want.” Allyn fired the missile and had his eyes set on an abandoned building. Jim then said, “I also forgot, watch out for friendly fire.” Allyn said “what?” As he looked over at Jim.

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What do you call a retard in a house fire? Flame Retardant

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What do you call Stephan hawkings on fire HOT WHEELS

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Why was the man fired from a calendar factory? – He took a day off. Commander: "Fire a warning shot" Soldier: "Sir, this is a M32 grenade launcher" Commander: "potato, potato, just fire" Soldier: fires M32 grenade launcher near a pre-school Commander: “They’re trying to run, TAKE THEM DOWN!”

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