What do you call Stephan hawkings on fire HOT WHEELS
Are you a fire alarm because your loud and annoying
A kid is arrested for a school shooting threat he is then apprehended and asked why he wanted to do this. He responds with “what do you mean I already did it” then the police ran back to the school to aprehend the other people he was planing it with the cops busted in through the doors which caused a smoke trap to go off which then the cops saw three people walk in and the police begin to fire. But as the smoke began to clear the cops saw that the three people were 16 kids duck taped to rolling poles 4 per pole. Back to the station holding the kid being apprehended. the kid puts his feet up on a chair and said “Aww it pays to be lazy!”
I can’t believe I got fired at the calender factory. I mean… All I did was take a day off!
my friend committed suicide yesterday…at least he went out with a bang
On the inside of a fire hydrant you’ll find H2O. What’s on the outside? K9P
I got a job at a library once, i got fired like an hour in because the library manager said that the cookbooks didn’t go into the women’s sports section.
I was about to change my password to fire-fist ace… but apparently it was too weak.
Hey God what are you making? Just a wooden stick that lights on fire sounds like a match made in heaven
What do you call a retard in a house fire? Flame Retardant
My little cousin’s birthday was in a few days and his mom said he wanted Hot Wheels. So I sent him a video of me pushing a paralyzed kid into fire and screaming “HOT WHEELS!”
Jim and Allyn are 2 mates in the Air Force. They were paired up for a training exersice. They got up into the air and Jim said, “okay Allyn, your helmet can control the missile when launched from the jet. Go ahead and test fire a missile and aim it at anything you want.” Allyn fired the missile and had his eyes set on an abandoned building. Jim then said, “I also forgot, watch out for friendly fire.” Allyn said “what?” As he looked over at Jim.
Chuck Norris can make a fire with two ice cubes
“Sanderson, fire a warning shot.” “Uhh sir, this is an M32 rotary grenade launcher.” “Ah potato-potato, just pull the trigger.”
I got suspended at school today, I lit a kids wheelchair on fire and called him hot wheels
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