When the school shooter pulls the fire alarm and the autistic kid thinks it’s a rave party.
Why did the little boy cross the road multiple times? He stepped on an IED after being mutilated on a chopping block that was on fire with a table saw and multiple gallows which were infested with flaming termites with splotches of blood all over him from his eyes after they were squashed with a brick.
I can’t believe I got fired at the calender factory. I mean… All I did was take a day off!
I pushed a kid on a wheelchair into the school fire and said “hot wheels”
What do you call a red neck on fire. A fire cracker
I’ve just been fired from the clock making factory after all those extra hours I put in.
There are some sounds that everyone loves… Shoes on gravel Crackling of fire The snapping necks of those who think they can disrespect you Cats purring
A kid is arrested for a school shooting threat he is then apprehended and asked why he wanted to do this. He responds with “what do you mean I already did it” then the police ran back to the school to aprehend the other people he was planing it with the cops busted in through the doors which caused a smoke trap to go off which then the cops saw three people walk in and the police begin to fire. But as the smoke began to clear the cops saw that the three people were 16 kids duck taped to rolling poles 4 per pole. Back to the station holding the kid being apprehended. the kid puts his feet up on a chair and said “Aww it pays to be lazy!”
What are so special about bullets ? :- They do work after they are fired
I refuse to believe my dad got fired as a road worker for theft. But when I came home there were signs everywhere
Why Was The Blonde Fired From The M&M Factory? For Throwing Out the W’s A missionary was caught by cannibals. we was tied up and thrown into a big pot. The cannibals were chopping up vegetables and throwing them into the pot with the missionary. When they lit the fire under the pot, the missionary said, “You can’t stew me. I’m a friar.”
The only thing brighter than my future is the fire on the world trade center.
Jim and Allyn are 2 mates in the Air Force. They were paired up for a training exersice. They got up into the air and Jim said, “okay Allyn, your helmet can control the missile when launched from the jet. Go ahead and test fire a missile and aim it at anything you want.” Allyn fired the missile and had his eyes set on an abandoned building. Jim then said, “I also forgot, watch out for friendly fire.” Allyn said “what?” As he looked over at Jim.
What’s the difference between a hamster and a cigarette? They’re both harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire
Chuck Norris uses elevators only in case of fire.
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