Fire jokes

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My aunt worked as a human cannon ball I’m not sure if she was good at it until she got fired

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I had a friend who was a deep sleeper. One day, a fire started in his house. Now he’s a really deep sleeper.

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I got suspended at school today, I lit a kids wheelchair on fire and called him hot wheels

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I love fire. My friends love it too. When i set them on fire, they run around and scream. They sometimes get so tired they immediately fall asleep forever. Also, they need a shower.

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I refuse to believe my dad got fired as a road worker for theft. But when I came home there were signs everywhere

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ROBERT LEWANDISNEY SONG Give me freedom Give me fire Give me contract Or I retire Jog all day Out of UCL now FC Barcelona I need you now Villarreal defenders They surround me Big submarines All around me I get upset Call my agent I want money I’m impatient

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Father : I don’t trust you, You poured your seed in my daughter’s belly,. Son : But Paah you can’t fire me. Father: You’re lucky you’re my brother too or I’d kill you.

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Man: I got fired from my job at the calander factory. Lady: What did you do? Man: I took a day of…

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Hey God what are you making? Just a wooden stick that lights on fire sounds like a match made in heaven

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Did you know that Former Australian Prime Minister Scott Morrison was a firefighter? He got fired for trying to fight a fire with tickets to Hawaii.

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What is black and sits at the top of the stairs? – Steven Hawking after a house fire.

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I live next to a kindergarten and yesterday they had a fire drill. It was kinda weird because normally it’s me who has a drill around little children.

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