My aunt worked as a human cannon ball I’m not sure if she was good at it until she got fired
my friend was in a wheel chair so i rolled him in fire now i call him hot wheels
Are you a fire alarm because your loud and annoying
Q: How do you make a 9/11 cocktail? A: Light two Manhattans on fire and then knock them over.
my friend committed suicide yesterday…at least he went out with a bang
There are some sounds that everyone loves… Shoes on gravel Crackling of fire The snapping necks of those who think they can disrespect you Cats purring
I pushed a kid on a wheelchair into the school fire and said “hot wheels”
Little Natalie was playing with matches. Her mother caught her, took them, whupped her and told her never to play with matches again. A few minutes later, Little Natalie was playing with matches again. The curtains caught fire and the house burned down. Another few minutes later, when she and her mother were sitting at their neighbors, her mother told her: If you think I gave you a whupping, wait till your father gets home! Little Natalie just cackled with delight, because she knew her father had gotten home earlier and gone upstairs to take a nap.
Chuck Norris uses elevators only in case of fire.
Why did the little boy cross the road multiple times? He stepped on an IED after being mutilated on a chopping block that was on fire with a table saw and multiple gallows which were infested with flaming termites with splotches of blood all over him from his eyes after they were squashed with a brick.
I love fire. My friends love it too. When i set them on fire, they run around and scream. They sometimes get so tired they immediately fall asleep forever. Also, they need a shower.
why was michael jackson fired as a guitar teacher because he fingerd a minor
I had a friend who was a deep sleeper. One day, a fire started in his house. Now he’s a really deep sleeper.
Roses are red, Violets are red, Sunflowers are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN’S ON FIRE
What do you call Stephan hawkings on fire HOT WHEELS
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