whats black and sits at the top of the stairs? stephen hawkings during a house fire.
why was michael jackson fired as a guitar teacher because he fingerd a minor
The only thing brighter than my future is the fire on the world trade center.
Why did the little boy cross the road multiple times? He stepped on an IED after being mutilated on a chopping block that was on fire with a table saw and multiple gallows which were infested with flaming termites with splotches of blood all over him from his eyes after they were squashed with a brick.
I was about to change my password to fire-fist ace… but apparently it was too weak.
Q. Two gay guys are having sex, when suddenly the house catches fire. Who gets out of the house first, the guy on top or bottom? A. They guy on the bottom because he already has his shit packed.
(I want to apologize in advance. These are very dark jokes) What’s red and bad for your teeth? A brick I was going to tell a dead baby joke. But I decided to abort. Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle? His wife is dead. 4.Why does Helen Keller hate porcupines? They’re painful to look at. Why can’t orphans play baseball? They don’t know where home is. Give a man a match, and he’ll be warm for a few hours. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life. I asked a pretty, young homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled at me and said yes. The look on her face soon changed, however, when I walked off with her cardboard box. My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children. If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
I pushed an orphan in a wheelchair into a fire and yelled hot wheels
“Sanderson, fire a warning shot.” “Uhh sir, this is an M32 rotary grenade launcher.” “Ah potato-potato, just pull the trigger.”
What are so special about bullets ? :- They do work after they are fired
I pushed a kid on a wheelchair into the school fire and said “hot wheels”
Why did the guitarist get fired as a carpenter? He was shredding the floor…
What’s the difference between a skeleton and a baby? I don’t set the skeleton on fire.
On the inside of a fire hydrant you’ll find H2O. What’s on the outside? K9P
Did you hear about the fire in the shoe factory? Many soles were lost.
RUS | ENG
