What does a cigarette and a hamster have in common? Both are completely harmless untill you put it in your mouth and light it on fire.
Are you a fire alarm because your loud and annoying
Little Natalie was playing with matches. Her mother caught her, took them, whupped her and told her never to play with matches again. A few minutes later, Little Natalie was playing with matches again. The curtains caught fire and the house burned down. Another few minutes later, when she and her mother were sitting at their neighbors, her mother told her: If you think I gave you a whupping, wait till your father gets home! Little Natalie just cackled with delight, because she knew her father had gotten home earlier and gone upstairs to take a nap.
wood fired pizza how would pizza get a job now
You’re the type of person to play girl on fire during a funeral
I’ve just been fired from the clock making factory after all those extra hours I put in.
What do you call an emo kid playing with fire? Forgot to clean little piece of dust.
What’s Black and sits at the top of the stairs? Stephen Hawkins in a house fire.
What’s the difference between a hamster and a cigarette? They’re both harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire
Michael Jackson was once a guitar teacher, but he got fired because he fingered a minor
I got a job at a library once, i got fired like an hour in because the library manager said that the cookbooks didn’t go into the women’s sports section.
There are some sounds that everyone loves… Shoes on gravel Crackling of fire The snapping necks of those who think they can disrespect you Cats purring
On the inside of a fire hydrant you’ll find H2O. What’s on the outside? K9P
Are you the Lusitania cos i wanna fire a torpedo into you
Q: Why did the chef get fired? A: He took cooking advice from Hitler!
RUS | ENG
