Fire jokes

I can’t believe I got fired at the calender factory. I mean… All I did was take a day off!

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I got suspended at school today, I lit a kids wheelchair on fire and called him hot wheels

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Man: I got fired from my job at the calander factory. Lady: What did you do? Man: I took a day of…

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I live next to a kindergarten and yesterday they had a fire drill. It was kinda weird because normally it’s me who has a drill around little children.

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My doctor told me that I had to burn calories, so I took a fat kid and lit them on fire

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What’s the difference between a Cop and a bullet? When a bullet kills someone it gets fired. I usually dont make 9/11 jokes. But they just are fire.

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Father : I don’t trust you, You poured your seed in my daughter’s belly,. Son : But Paah you can’t fire me. Father: You’re lucky you’re my brother too or I’d kill you.

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ROBERT LEWANDISNEY SONG Give me freedom Give me fire Give me contract Or I retire Jog all day Out of UCL now FC Barcelona I need you now Villarreal defenders They surround me Big submarines All around me I get upset Call my agent I want money I’m impatient

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