Fire jokes

My school is fire today and I pushed a kid in a wheelchair down the stairs and shouted HOT WHEELS

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whats stephan hawkings called on fire hotwheels:)

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whats black and sits at the top of the stairs? stephen hawkings during a house fire.

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why did the man get fired from work cause he took 2 days off in febuary

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I got a job at a library once, i got fired like an hour in because the library manager said that the cookbooks didn’t go into the women’s sports section.

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There are some sounds that everyone loves… Shoes on gravel Crackling of fire The snapping necks of those who think they can disrespect you Cats purring

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Jim and Allyn are 2 mates in the Air Force. They were paired up for a training exersice. They got up into the air and Jim said, “okay Allyn, your helmet can control the missile when launched from the jet. Go ahead and test fire a missile and aim it at anything you want.” Allyn fired the missile and had his eyes set on an abandoned building. Jim then said, “I also forgot, watch out for friendly fire.” Allyn said “what?” As he looked over at Jim.

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i use to work at a calendar factory but i got fired because i missed a few days

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1.) What’s Yellow And Can’t Swim? A Bus Full Of Children 2.) Did you hear bout the pilsbury dough boy? he died of a yeast infection 3.) I will never forget my grandads last words… “you’re still holding the ladder right?” 4.) I have a fish that can breakdance… only for 20 seconds though, and only once 5.) give a man a match and he will be warm for a few hours… lite a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life

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My doctor told me that I had to burn calories, so I took a fat kid and lit them on fire

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your breath is so hot it mad the chicgo fire.

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What do you call a red neck on fire. A fire cracker

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my friend committed suicide yesterday…at least he went out with a bang

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I love fire. My friends love it too. When i set them on fire, they run around and scream. They sometimes get so tired they immediately fall asleep forever. Also, they need a shower.

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What do you call a retard in a house fire? Flame Retardant

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