Fire jokes

What’s the difference between a Cop and a bullet? When a bullet kills someone it gets fired. I usually dont make 9/11 jokes. But they just are fire.

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Why did the little boy cross the road multiple times? He stepped on an IED after being mutilated on a chopping block that was on fire with a table saw and multiple gallows which were infested with flaming termites with splotches of blood all over him from his eyes after they were squashed with a brick.

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I had a friend who was a deep sleeper. One day, a fire started in his house. Now he’s a really deep sleeper.

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What’s the difference between a skeleton and a baby? I don’t set the skeleton on fire.

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Once upon a time, there were three kingdoms, all bordering on the same lake. For centuries, these kingdoms had fought over an island in the middle of that lake. One day, they decided to have it out, once and for all. The first kingdom was quite rich, and sent an army of 25 knights, each with three squires. The night before the battle, the knights jousted

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I got suspended at school today, I lit a kids wheelchair on fire and called him hot wheels

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I can’t believe I got fired at the calender factory. I mean… All I did was take a day off!

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When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat children into the fire.

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I refuse to believe my dad got fired as a road worker for theft. But when I came home there were signs everywhere

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What are so special about bullets ? :- They do work after they are fired

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