3 people died and went to Hell. One of them is from America, the second guy is from Germany, and the third guy is from Afghanistan. The devil lets each person make a phone call to their loved ones in the country they came from but they will be charged. The American spends 10 minutes on the phone and is charged $20. The German spends 12 minutes on the phone and is charged $24. The man from Afghanistan spends half an hour on the phone and is charged nothing. The other two guys asked the devil why. The devil responded: “Local calls are free”.
None of these jokes are close to funny! Btw who the hell is gwen?
Why is Steven Hawkins going to hell… because its a stairway to heaven not a ramp!
Dark humour : hell !!! aren’t people racist !!!
there was a kid at school he was reading a book and he came across a phrase it was purple pation he went to his teacher and asked what it ment his teacher said hat the actual hell get the hell out of my class and go to the princible offic the princible said its ok iwas probably a mistake i will clean this all up in the mean time whats the phrase he says purple pation his prncible stares at him for about 3 seconds then says get the hell out of my school u r expelled he ran 7 miles to his dads offic crying all the way he went to his dad and explained how hs teacher kicked him out of the class and the princable expelled him his dad said calm down i will clean this all up and he said thats what the princable said he said i will clean it up he said ok the phrase is purple pation hisdad said i hate u getout of myoffice i dont want to see u again he ran down crying to his house he explained what happened his mom said the same thing as everyone else so he explaines the phrase his moms kickes him out of the house and he ran down to the park crying a old lady said whats wrong he explained whats happening then she says wellwhats the phrase he says purplepation the old lady said see that house across the street thats my house come over in about 30 min and i will explain he says thank u it was the longest 30 min htm title=' gets hit by a bus sorry guys ;)'>of his life he sprints across the street and gets hit by a bus sorry guys ;)
Bick: Jesus isn’t real. Ron: Yes he is. Bick: Prove it, bitch. Ron: Cussing is a in. Open the curtains. Bick: Wh- Ron: JUST DO IT, DAMMIT. The sunlight shone through the window, landing on Ron and Bick. Both of them died and went to hell. Ron: f@ck you, Jesus. Bick: Told you Jesus was real. Satan: Get to work, slaves. Moral of the story: Stay off the marijuana.
It ain’t always easy having erectile dysfunction but it sure as hell ain’t hard
Do you know how to make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
Roses are red, violets are blue, You think violets are blue, what the hell is wrong with you.
ahem… if somebody you dont like, or somebody random just calls you in general, answer the phone with this Hello thank you for choosing mamas pizzeria/ abortion clinic, your loss is our sauce how may i help you? or hello this is davids orphanage you make them we take them how may i help you? some people reactions are priceless and then the wonder about you mental health
how to make holy water 1-grab a pot 2-put water in it 3-set the stove to 420 degrees 4-boil the hell out of it
Addison Banks Age (8) "I’m a little brat who won’t shut up the hell! And stop talking!
A priest and a nun are traveling across the desert on a camel and when all the sudden the camel dies. They’re in the middle of the desert with no hope of rescue when that night the priest thinks to himself that he can’t die a virgin. He looks over at the nun and pulls out his penis. The nun says father what is that? He says this sister is the wand of life. The nun says good, now go stick it in that camels ass and let’s get the hell outa here!
Ten Catholic priests all die in a bus accident. When they arrive at the pearly gates, St. Peter acknowledges them. He sees that they’re all priests and immediately says "If any of you are pedophiles, there’s no point waiting here. You might as well eff off straight to hell right now!” Nine of the priests turn around and begin to walk away. St. Peter calls after them, "AND TAKE THE DEAF BASTARD WITH YOU TOO!”
I heard Kobe was writing a book about helicopters but it just wouldn’t land with people… I know, I’m going to hell…
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