What’s a similarity between your best friend and a tree? They both fall over when you hit them with an axe.
What do Pink Floyd and Princess Diana have in common? Their last big hit was the wall.
titanic - “yo look at that sexy babe of an iceberg, lets hit her” (Set up joke for the actual joke) So why don’t blind people go sky diving? It scares the hell out of their seeing eye dog. (Actual joke) When does a blind person know when he’s about to hit the ground? The leash goes slack.
I was working for Space X. I was instructed to control a satellite’s orbit rotation when suddenly the screen went black. I investigated and found out one of Penaldos penalty had hit and destroyed the satellite. Shame on you Penaldo for ruining my dream job!
What hit the floor first, the kid or the feather? the feather. the rope stopped the kid
Women are like blackjack. I’m trying for 21, but I always hit on 14.
When your mom tries to hit you with the belt but misses and hits herself… #victoryroyale
When an emo kid jumps out of a tree what happens when he hits the ground? Nothin much he just flops over an hour later when they untie the rope
tell a dark joke to an orphan then hit them they’ll get the punchline right away
What is the difference between a plane and a helicoptor. A plane hits a building but a helicopter hits the floor
Why don’t orphans get offended by dark humour jokes? It can’t hit home.
My life is a lot like a game of Black Jack I always hit on 16, the get busted
There were once three brothers, Shit, Shut up and Manners. One day Shit got hit by a car. Shut up went to find help at the local police station whilst Manners tried to help Shit. When Shut up got to the police station he says “my brother has just been hit by a car.” The policeman replied with “OK then first I need to know your name.” “Shut up” “No, I need to know your name.” “Shut up. ” “Excuse me but where are your manners.” “Round the corner picking up shit.”
Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a cup and told the police she got mugged.
Today was a terrible day. My wife got hit by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver
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