any girl can be a squirter if you hit the right artery
When two wheel chairs hit each other is it a fender bender
What’s a similarity between your best friend and a tree? They both fall over when you hit them with an axe.
a man walks into a bar, and notices a steak hanging from the ceiling. when he asks the bartender about it, the bartender says “If you can jump up and hit it, drinks are on the house for the night, but if you miss, everyone’s drinks are on your tab for the next two hours. Do you want to try? ” the man decided not to take the risk. he thought the steaks where too high.
Whole reason he is dead is because he kept hitting ‘Remind me later’ on his Windows Updates. When you going 80 mph and hit a speed bump Then the speed bump starts screaming
What is the difference between a plane and a helicoptor. A plane hits a building but a helicopter hits the floor
A german soldier is walking down the street during a hail storm when a lady suddenly falls over after being hit. He, along with a few others, walk over to her. One man asks, “What happened?” and the soldier replies, “Hail hit her.” (say the joke aloud and it will make more sense)
My life is a lot like a game of Black Jack I always hit on 16, the get busted
Why didn’t Sally get home from work. She got hit by a bus
Friends are like trees, they fall over if you hit them with an ax.
My ex girlfriend got hit by a bus. I also lost my bus drivers licence.
Why don’t orphans get offended by dark humour jokes? It can’t hit home.
Whats the point of hiding the screaming speedbump you ran over? You might as well hit it again to A: Stop the screaming B:Make it look like an actually speed bump and C: … You think its Hilarious the noise it makes when you ran over its stomach
Jason: Did you hear about the storm-trooper who attempted suicide? Dave: No. Jason: Well, he hit his first target.
Best friend: dude your sister is hot i’d Hit that Me: already did SWEEETT HOMMEE ALABAMA
RUS | ENG
