Hit jokes

My ex girlfriend got hit by a bus. I also lost my bus drivers licence.

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I was wondering why the frisbee was getting bigger, then it hit me.

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What do you do when your dish washer stops working Hit your wife harder

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There were three people on the third floor of a building the first one took a bite of a apple then said it was too hard so he threw it out the window the second person took a bite of a lemon he said it was too sour so he threw it out the window the third guy was drunk, he took a bite of a grenade and thought it was to crunchy so he threw it out the window then one of them went downstairs he saw a dog laying on the ground dead the apple had hit the dog in the head then there was a little girl crying with her cat in her lap it had died because the lemon fell out the window and hit it in the head next there was a old guy laughing i asked him why he was laugh he said “i farted and the building behind me blew up”.

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I’m not saying I hate you. But if you got hit by a bus I’d be driving that bus.

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What is a suicide packs favorite song… Let the bodies hit floor

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When earthquakes hit coffins become maracas underground

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What do friends and trees have in common? They both fall down when you hit them with an axe.

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What do Pink Floyd and Princess Diana have in common? Their last big hit was the wall.

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Today was a terrible day. My wife got hit by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver

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Best friend: dude your sister is hot i’d Hit that Me: already did SWEEETT HOMMEE ALABAMA

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My life is a lot like a game of Black Jack I always hit on 16, the get busted

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Whats the point of hiding the screaming speedbump you ran over? You might as well hit it again to A: Stop the screaming B:Make it look like an actually speed bump and C: … You think its Hilarious the noise it makes when you ran over its stomach

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tell a dark joke to an orphan then hit them they’ll get the punchline right away

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if you hit a child that’s child abuse. if you hit a family member that’s abuse. if you kill either, it’s murder for some reason. if it’s a whole family, its genocide for another reason.

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