What do Pink Floyd and Princess Diana have in common? Their last big hit was the wall.
My ex girlfriend got hit by a bus. I also lost my bus drivers licence.
Why don’t orphans get offended by dark humour jokes? It can’t hit home.
I was hit on by president kennedy, too bad i shot him down
What hit the floor first, the kid or the feather? the feather. the rope stopped the kid
Girls are like blackjack you shoot for 21 but I keep hitting 14
Friends are like trees, they fall over if you hit them with an ax.
Why did the kid drop his icecream? He got hit by a bus.
My life is a lot like a game of Black Jack I always hit on 16, the get busted
What’s black and white and red all over? The prisoner I just hit with my car.
When an emo kid jumps out of a tree what happens when he hits the ground? Nothin much he just flops over an hour later when they untie the rope
In America planes hit the twin towers. In Soviet Russia Twin Towers hit planes.
So Johnny was in kindergarten and his teacher assigned him to learn the ABC’s so he goes home and ask his mom who’s cooking “Whats the first letter of the ABC’s?” he ask and his mom responds with “SHUT UP… I’M COOKING!” so then he walks to sister who’s signing in the shower and asks her “Whats the 2nd letter of the ABC’s?” she responds with “I’m ready
Knott and Shott got into a gunfight. Knott was shot and Shott was not. Therefore it was better to be Shott than Knott. But what if the shot Shott shot didn’t hit Knott but Shott? Then the shot Shott shot shot Shott.
Doctor : what makes you feel depressed? Me: I used to work at the word trade centre, before the plane hit. Doctor: a lot of people fell to pieces after that.
RUS | ENG
