I got hit in the head with a can of soda yesterday. Luckily for me, it was a soft drink.
What did the fish say when it hit the wall? Dam. What did the other fish say to that fish when he hit the wall? Dumb Bass.
Why did i walk across the road? to get hit by a car
Why don’t orphans get offended by dark humour jokes? It can’t hit home.
any girl can be a squirter if you hit the right artery
friend: hits head* others: how many fingers am i holding up? me: to friend* how suicidal am i on a scale from one to ten? friend: ten me: hes fine guys
Doctor : what makes you feel depressed? Me: I used to work at the word trade centre, before the plane hit. Doctor: a lot of people fell to pieces after that.
I’d Hit You But I Don’t Wanna Go To Jail For Animal Abuse.
Friends are like trees, they fall over if you hit them with an ax.
Whats the point of hiding the screaming speedbump you ran over? You might as well hit it again to A: Stop the screaming B:Make it look like an actually speed bump and C: … You think its Hilarious the noise it makes when you ran over its stomach
What did the fish say before he hit the wall? – “Oh, dam.”
Knott and Shott got into a gunfight. Knott was shot and Shott was not. Therefore it was better to be Shott than Knott. But what if the shot Shott shot didn’t hit Knott but Shott? Then the shot Shott shot shot Shott.
The weirdest thing happend to me today i was driving 50mph and hit a speedbump aand it screamed
A german soldier is walking down the street during a hail storm when a lady suddenly falls over after being hit. He, along with a few others, walk over to her. One man asks, “What happened?” and the soldier replies, “Hail hit her.” (say the joke aloud and it will make more sense)
What do Pink Floyd and Princess Diana have in common? Their last big hit was the wall.
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