The department of touch yourself is coming to the UK near you, I hope Scotland gets freedom I can’t wait to leave England and live in Scotland.
Why do emo kids sneak up on their Vietnamese grandfather’s? Because they hope the war experience kicks in.
I hope you forget your password to something only to send something to an email that you also forgot the password to.
Hi guys I am starting a gwen funny club if you wanna join then just type so here hope you have fun! Oh and also can be a Gwen name club for Gwens only!
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because these jokes are not funny Heres why the chicken crossed the road… The chicken was on the run from a crazy-ass butcher ready to murder the poor thing, so the chicken crossed the road.The chicken was crossing the road, then a blind kid saw the chicken, and the kid was hit by a flying rock, his vision was blurred (what vision?) and was actually cured of the blind. The chicken ran and jumped into a truck’s opening, and was never seen again… The kid got up from the ground and looked at the road, to see the chicken was not there, and said…" The chicken crossed the road…" The kid yelled at everyone about the chicken crossing the road, and got a lot of positive attention. Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and reddit was full of the chicken nonsense, and gained widespread attention from N.A to Asia in only 1 day. The butcher was arrested for the attempted murder of a joke animal, and was sentenced to over 20 years in solitary confinement, and a few weeks later, the sentence was moved to a life sentence, and the butcher became known as The ChicKiller. The End (hope you enjoyed, i was bored so i made this shit…)
A man went to Ford dealership hoping to find a car but he said the weren’t aFORDable
A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant. After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: “Well, I hope you like changing diapers!” She replies: “Oh my god! Am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?” To which he responds: “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”
There was the person who sent ten different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.
me and my suicidal friend are close, so i took him to the mall to treat him. we bought snacks, a new controller for his xbox and a led lights for him room to hopefully brighten his mood. after we scanned the last item, the machine beeped by itself.
I was watching the local chief police in America, he said we will never forget 911. I thought i should hope not its your phone number.
Someone broke into my house and took my anti-depressants… I hope they’re happy now
I entered 10 puns in a pun contest, hoping one would win, but no pun in ten did.
A priest and a nun are traveling across the desert on a camel and when all the sudden the camel dies. They’re in the middle of the desert with no hope of rescue when that night the priest thinks to himself that he can’t die a virgin. He looks over at the nun and pulls out his penis. The nun says father what is that? He says this sister is the wand of life. The nun says good, now go stick it in that camels ass and let’s get the hell outa here!
Dads are boomerangs, I hope. ???????????????
A little girl was sitting with some other kids, she thought to herself, I want to have kids when Im older, at least they’ll have a home, parents, and hopefully a dad that actually came back with the milk!????
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