its only ok to beat up an dwarf when they walk up to your wife and say your hair smells nice I saw my wife at the dam yesterday. Drat. I was hoping she might float a bit more downstream.
A priest and a nun are traveling across the desert on a camel and when all the sudden the camel dies. They’re in the middle of the desert with no hope of rescue when that night the priest thinks to himself that he can’t die a virgin. He looks over at the nun and pulls out his penis. The nun says father what is that? He says this sister is the wand of life. The nun says good, now go stick it in that camels ass and let’s get the hell outa here!
When I was a kid, my hamster died so my mum bought a new identical one, hoping I wouldn’t notice. It didn’t matter anyway, since I beat that one to death too
Friends are very important . I have lots of friends in very high places I hope the police can talk them down
Your’e moama is so funey looking that when the doctor called her he said never visit me againe I hope you dye
Someone broke into my house and took my anti-depressants… I hope they’re happy now
I hope Stephen hawking was an organ donor cause I need some parts for my go cart While I was out shopping i tripped in a store and a lady would not stop staring at me, for fun I said “Sorry! It’s been awhile since I’ve possessed a body.” She looked horrified. Dads are like boomerangs. . . I hope! Son: Dad why is my name Experience? Dad: Son, Experience is the name we give our mistakes. You won’t eat a human, so why eat meat? Bold of you to presume I won’t eat a person.
How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thin you slice them-hope marie lawson
A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant. After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: “Well, I hope you like changing nappies/diapers”. She replies: “Oh my god am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?” To which he responds: “No, you’ve got bowel cancer. ” I hope ya’ll that have depression kys you are worthless trash just kidding
Hi guys I am starting a gwen funny club if you wanna join then just type so here hope you have fun! Oh and also can be a Gwen name club for Gwens only!
Decisions taken by world leaders often have great significance during a crisis.The Americans, in particular, are suffering many losses during the current global pandemic. Remember, In the 1980’s they had Ronald Reagan, Johnny Cash and Bob Hope. In 2020 they have Donald Trump, no Cash and no Hope!
Any body have nothing to do? Well here is a prank that you’ll never forget! ( Btw I never actually did this irl yet) So tell your parents at night to come in in about 30 minutes cuz your legs hurt and you need them rubbed. So when they come in, pretend like your sleeping and right before they go out shout: NO! Then they will look at you but you’ll be sleeping.
i love murder shows… wish me luck cause im kinda hoping to be on one one day
To whoever stole my antidepressants I hope you are happy now
twinkle, twinkle little star. I hope i’ll get hit by a car. am not dead yet, i hope i’ll die. I hope i’ll born to a new hole life.
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