So i was sitting with my little brother and talk about our dreams. “What do you wanna be when you grow up?” I asked him. He answered “A doctor!”. I wanted to tease him so i said “I wouldn’t be treated by a doctor like you”. I was hoping he would get mad or something but instead, he calmly replied “Brother, i said doctor. Not a vet”
Decisions taken by world leaders often have great significance during a crisis.The Americans, in particular, are suffering many losses during the current global pandemic. Remember, In the 1980’s they had Ronald Reagan, Johnny Cash and Bob Hope. In 2020 they have Donald Trump, no Cash and no Hope!
I hope when I inevitably choke to death on gummy bears, people just say I was killed by bears and leave it at that
I GAVE UP HOPE AND I LIKED IT!! I TAKE MEDS TO FEEL FANTASTIC! (i kissed a boy{but fed up lyrics})
Did you hear about the man who swallowed his watch? He went to the doctor hoping he could give him something to help pass the time.
A man went to Ford dealership hoping to find a car but he said the weren’t aFORDable
I donated to the LQBTQ community hopefully now they can find a cure
I hope death is a woman That way she’ll never look at me twice
A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant. After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: “Well, I hope you like changing diapers!” She replies: “Oh my god! Am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?” To which he responds: “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”
You know, I got a SKELETON, of these jokes, all are HUMERUS, yeah, this get’s Under people’s SKIN, but I guess you could call their FUNNY BONE BROKEN! People try and hit me when this happens, luckily, I got THICK SKIN! Yeah, thanks for listening, hope you got these puns down TO THE BONE!
hhpr
A pedophile lures a group of Houston Girl Scouts with “Hey girls, would you like some candy?” They all agree and follow him to his neighborhood. There he offers them some more candy and they follow him to his house. Once again he offers them candy to go in to his house. In the lounge he offers them candy to go to his room. As he leads them up the stairs one of them pipes up and says “God, I hope we get laid before we get diabetes”
I hope you forget your password to something only to send something to an email that you also forgot the password to.
I hope death is a girl that way it’ll never come for me. Your mommas so depressed she shot herself in the head hoping she’d die
When I was a kid, my hamster died so my mum bought a new identical one, hoping I wouldn’t notice. It didn’t matter anyway, since I beat that one to death too
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