Hope jokes

A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant. After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: “Well, I hope you like changing diapers!” She replies: “Oh my god! Am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?” To which he responds: “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Hope everyone is having a good day ??

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

So, I know that there are a lot of egg YOLKS on this website, and I guess I got BEAT to it, but I’m EGGcited to say EGGsactly what the eggs say. I know I;m bad at this but I hope you will crack up anywat

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

One day, inexplicably, my talking parrot started insulting me. He called me an idiot, a fool, a jerk, stupid, and a variety of other nasty names. I warned the squawker to cease, but to no avian avail. Fed up, I finally flipped the foul-mouthed feather-brain into the freezer…but after about 15 seconds, I relented and let him out. “I’m so sorry,” he declared! “I don’t know what came over me, and realize I shouldn’t have said those terrible things. I hope you can forgive me, and I promise never to do it again! By the way…what did the chicken do?” ????

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I hope there is a lift to heaven ?? I shouldn’t be making jokes tho ????

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What did the fork say to the cake when he said i hope u get eaten Fork off

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

A police man once said I will never forget 9/11 I said I hope not that’s your phone number

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Dads are boomerangs, I hope. ???????????????

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

I hope death is a girl that way it’ll never come for me. Your mommas so depressed she shot herself in the head hoping she’d die

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

how it be when the new guy takes too long… hay Danny, its me Johnny. Johnny: boss says to kill the guy in red. point the gun at his head. Danny: ok target locked. 3… 2… 1… bang. Johnny: danny hope you did not get the man in red> Danny; OH MY BRO FOR REALL.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

me and my suicidal friend are close, so i took him to the mall to treat him. we bought snacks, a new controller for his xbox and a led lights for him room to hopefully brighten his mood. after we scanned the last item, the machine beeped by itself.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

My hopes and dreams

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

twinkle, twinkle little star. I hope i’ll get hit by a car. am not dead yet, i hope i’ll die. I hope i’ll born to a new hole life.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thin you slice them-hope marie lawson

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I was given my Electronics test today. Turns out it was given to me cauz I have the same name as someone who got 54/59. I actually got my hopes up too.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
- up - << N E X T! >> random

© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2026