Hope jokes

How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thin you slice them-hope marie lawson

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whoever took my anti-depressent pills I hope your f@cking happy

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After getting in the White House, D.Trump gets a letter… … from the Iranian president. He opens it and to his surprise there is a paper with a weird looking code on it: 370HSSV 0773H All confused, Trump contacts the FBI and forwards the letter to them in hope they can figure out the meaning, but they weren’t able to. Trump gets angry and sends the letter to both the CIA and NSA, and they also fail to figure out the meaning of the letter. One of the agents suggest Trump to ask for MI6’s help, so he does and few minutes after a British agent sends a fax to his secretary: Tell your president he was holding the letter upside down.

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A man puts in ten jokes into a joke contest. He hopes that at least one will. Sadly, no pun InTenDid.

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I hope when I inevitably choke to death on gummy bears, people just say I was killed by bears and leave it at that

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So, I tell my friend a pun about Bach. She freaks out. Then I say, I hope that wan’t to much to (Handel), (Dont) let it (Strauss) you out. For all of my musicians out there!

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I was watching the local chief police in America, he said we will never forget 911. I thought i should hope not its your phone number.

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When I was a kid, my hamster died so my mum bought a new identical one, hoping I wouldn’t notice. It didn’t matter anyway, since I beat that one to death too

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I hope death is a girl that way it’ll never come for me. Your mommas so depressed she shot herself in the head hoping she’d die

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one day I came to my mom and said “MOM!!! I can make a butterfly!” mom: “no you can’t…” me: throws butter out the window me: “look I made a butterfly!” lol this isn’t funny but I hope you liked it

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