Hope jokes

A man puts in ten jokes into a joke contest. He hopes that at least one will. Sadly, no pun InTenDid.

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Who ever invented school I hope you burn in hell.

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Someone broke into my house and took my anti-depressants… I hope they’re happy now

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I hope you see this plugin, but if your listing to this I really want to give you a little more…

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Friends are very important . I have lots of friends in very high places I hope the police can talk them down

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Did you hear about the man who swallowed his watch? He went to the doctor hoping he could give him something to help pass the time.

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Ok this is a texting joke this isnt my joke found it on google Mom:SON YOURE G-MOM JUST PASSED AWAY lol Son:mom how is that funny? !?! i hope ur not laughing MOm:OH NO I THOUGHT LOL MEANT LAUGHING OUT LOUD

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I donated to the LQBTQ community hopefully now they can find a cure

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What does the man say about his baby sister lydia? "I hope she electricutes herself!’

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Sometimes I look at someone I hate and think “I hope you get laid tonight.” By a tweaker with AIDS.

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This Dwarf was being mean to me so I said “when you get home I hope Snow White kicks the shit out of you.”

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People keep telling me they hope Kenny never has kids. I don’t think that’s a worry. His mom is much too old to get pregnant.

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A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant. After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: “Well, I hope you like changing nappies/diapers”. She replies: “Oh my god am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?” To which he responds: “No, you’ve got bowel cancer. ” I hope ya’ll that have depression kys you are worthless trash just kidding

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To the guy who stole my depression medication, I hope you’re happy

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I asked a girl I met if I could take her out to dinner The joke is I new right after she said I’ll call you She was lying to me, not surprised even a little The next joke was a part of me hoped she would call , but did I really think she was going to, I’ll never be good enough for anyone, what was I thinking, why did I even bother to ask her in the first place, I think it was just to prove I was right , I’m unwanted LONELINESS EQUALS SADNESS

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