Hope jokes

twinkle, twinkle little star. I hope i’ll get hit by a car. am not dead yet, i hope i’ll die. I hope i’ll born to a new hole life.

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I recently saw a pun contest in NYC. The owners said there was a maximum of 10 puns that I could submit. I wrote 10 puns and submitted all of them in hopes that at least one would win - however, no pun in ten did.

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Dads are boomerangs, I hope. ???????????????

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What does the man say about his baby sister lydia? "I hope she electricutes herself!’

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What’s the difference between a nun and a woman in a bath tub? One’s got hope in her soul, the others got soap in her hole.

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Did you hear about the man who swallowed his watch? He went to the doctor hoping he could give him something to help pass the time.

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So i was sitting with my little brother and talk about our dreams. “What do you wanna be when you grow up?” I asked him. He answered “A doctor!”. I wanted to tease him so i said “I wouldn’t be treated by a doctor like you”. I was hoping he would get mad or something but instead, he calmly replied “Brother, i said doctor. Not a vet”

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i told my friend to watch naruto, it’s been a week since i’ve seen him. Hope he comes back in one piece

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I asked a girl I met if I could take her out to dinner The joke is I new right after she said I’ll call you She was lying to me, not surprised even a little The next joke was a part of me hoped she would call , but did I really think she was going to, I’ll never be good enough for anyone, what was I thinking, why did I even bother to ask her in the first place, I think it was just to prove I was right , I’m unwanted LONELINESS EQUALS SADNESS

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