Hope jokes

A pedophile lures a group of Houston Girl Scouts with “Hey girls, would you like some candy?” They all agree and follow him to his neighborhood. There he offers them some more candy and they follow him to his house. Once again he offers them candy to go in to his house. In the lounge he offers them candy to go to his room. As he leads them up the stairs one of them pipes up and says “God, I hope we get laid before we get diabetes”

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Whoever Stole My Anti-Depression Medications I Hope You’re Happy!

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i told my friend to watch naruto, it’s been a week since i’ve seen him. Hope he comes back in one piece

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“I hope my death would make for sense then my life”- joker

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People keep telling me they hope Kenny never has kids. I don’t think that’s a worry. His mom is much too old to get pregnant.

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Hi guys I am starting a gwen funny club if you wanna join then just type so here hope you have fun! Oh and also can be a Gwen name club for Gwens only!

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Why do emo kids sneak up on their Vietnamese grandfather’s? Because they hope the war experience kicks in.

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one day I came to my mom and said “MOM!!! I can make a butterfly!” mom: “no you can’t…” me: throws butter out the window me: “look I made a butterfly!” lol this isn’t funny but I hope you liked it

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(Jokes for people with cancer) 1: I wish my cancer could kill me quicker so I don’t have to do this class anymore. 2: I’m dying, finally. 3: I’m sorry, I can’t go to your party because I’m expected to be dead by then. On a serious note, I might actually have cancer and I’m getting checks. I hope for the best :/. These people who are offended by rape jokes

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When I was a kid, my hamster died so my mum bought a new identical one, hoping I wouldn’t notice. It didn’t matter anyway, since I beat that one to death too

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I recently saw a pun contest in NYC. The owners said there was a maximum of 10 puns that I could submit. I wrote 10 puns and submitted all of them in hopes that at least one would win - however, no pun in ten did.

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A little girl was sitting with some other kids, she thought to herself, I want to have kids when Im older, at least they’ll have a home, parents, and hopefully a dad that actually came back with the milk!????

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Why do Indians gamble so much? They are hoping to one day reclaim their land

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Whats the difference between a Nun and a prostitue taking a bath? The Nun has a soul full of hope…