Hope jokes

What does the man say about his baby sister lydia? "I hope she electricutes herself!’

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Orphans always dip their Oreos in water? Hoping their dad comes back with the milk.

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whoever took my anti-depressent pills I hope your f@cking happy

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Roses are red, fishers are fishing, I really hope, you’ll be reported missing.

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One day, inexplicably, my talking parrot started insulting me. He called me an idiot, a fool, a jerk, stupid, and a variety of other nasty names. I warned the squawker to cease, but to no avian avail. Fed up, I finally flipped the foul-mouthed feather-brain into the freezer…but after about 15 seconds, I relented and let him out. “I’m so sorry,” he declared! “I don’t know what came over me, and realize I shouldn’t have said those terrible things. I hope you can forgive me, and I promise never to do it again! By the way…what did the chicken do?” ????

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A man is standing on the side of the road, waiting to cross, when another man stands alongside him, the first man says, " I have been waiting to cross here for ages, its impossible to cross " the second man says, “there is a zebra crossing up the road”, he said, “I hope he is having better luck than I am”.

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People keep telling me they hope Kenny never has kids. I don’t think that’s a worry. His mom is much too old to get pregnant.

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I hope death is a women. That way she’ll never come for me.

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me and my suicidal friend are close, so i took him to the mall to treat him. we bought snacks, a new controller for his xbox and a led lights for him room to hopefully brighten his mood. after we scanned the last item, the machine beeped by itself.

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how it be when the new guy takes too long… hay Danny, its me Johnny. Johnny: boss says to kill the guy in red. point the gun at his head. Danny: ok target locked. 3… 2… 1… bang. Johnny: danny hope you did not get the man in red> Danny; OH MY BRO FOR REALL.

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I was given my Electronics test today. Turns out it was given to me cauz I have the same name as someone who got 54/59. I actually got my hopes up too.

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A man puts in ten jokes into a joke contest. He hopes that at least one will. Sadly, no pun InTenDid.

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