I hope Stephen hawking was an organ donor cause I need some parts for my go cart While I was out shopping i tripped in a store and a lady would not stop staring at me, for fun I said “Sorry! It’s been awhile since I’ve possessed a body.” She looked horrified. Dads are like boomerangs. . . I hope! Son: Dad why is my name Experience? Dad: Son, Experience is the name we give our mistakes. You won’t eat a human, so why eat meat? Bold of you to presume I won’t eat a person.
One day, inexplicably, my talking parrot started insulting me. He called me an idiot, a fool, a jerk, stupid, and a variety of other nasty names. I warned the squawker to cease, but to no avian avail. Fed up, I finally flipped the foul-mouthed feather-brain into the freezer…but after about 15 seconds, I relented and let him out. “I’m so sorry,” he declared! “I don’t know what came over me, and realize I shouldn’t have said those terrible things. I hope you can forgive me, and I promise never to do it again! By the way…what did the chicken do?” ????
What does the man say about his baby sister lydia? "I hope she electricutes herself!’
A police man once said I will never forget 9/11 I said I hope not that’s your phone number
We have I hope we have life we have God in Jesus Christ this is a good thing it is a song part
So i was sitting with my little brother and talk about our dreams. “What do you wanna be when you grow up?” I asked him. He answered “A doctor!”. I wanted to tease him so i said “I wouldn’t be treated by a doctor like you”. I was hoping he would get mad or something but instead, he calmly replied “Brother, i said doctor. Not a vet”
Someone broke into my house and took my anti-depressants… I hope they’re happy now
Sometimes I look at someone I hate and think “I hope you get laid tonight.” By a tweaker with AIDS.
Whoever Stole My Anti-Depression Medications I Hope You’re Happy!
i love murder shows… wish me luck cause im kinda hoping to be on one one day
There was the person who sent ten different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.
Your’e moama is so funey looking that when the doctor called her he said never visit me againe I hope you dye
A man went to Ford dealership hoping to find a car but he said the weren’t aFORDable
A pedophile lures a group of Houston Girl Scouts with “Hey girls, would you like some candy?” They all agree and follow him to his neighborhood. There he offers them some more candy and they follow him to his house. Once again he offers them candy to go in to his house. In the lounge he offers them candy to go to his room. As he leads them up the stairs one of them pipes up and says “God, I hope we get laid before we get diabetes”
Orphans always dip their Oreos in water? Hoping their dad comes back with the milk.
RUS | ENG
