I asked my mum why she’s depressed, she said her life has been a wreck? I asked how long has it been, she then asked when I was born whats sad and has no life . the person reding this
Thankfully I’m still alive because I fail at everything in life.
As a child, my mother always told me she was going horse riding. My whole life change when I found out she was under the horse.
What’s the similarity between a broken pencil and my life? They’re both pointless.
A penis has a sad life. His hair is a mess. His family is nuts. His neighbor is an asshole. His best friend is a pussy. And his owner beats him.
My life is like a broken pencil, it’s pointless.
How do you know when an orphan is lying. When they say I swear on my mother’s life
What did Earth say to the other planets? – “You guys have no life!”
Despite Michael Jackson’s legal problems while we was alive, McDonald’s is still going to honor his life achievements in the music industry by naming a sandwich after him. They’re going to call it the McMichael! It’s going to be a fifty year old piece of meat pressed between two eight year old buns.
My doctor said I only have 1 year to live, so I killed him. Got sentenced to life in prison, problem solved!
In what ways do nuns and hoes have something in common? They both worship on their knees. They are both creatures of habit. They both take vows of poverty and obedience. Once chosen, neither can leave the life. They both swallow their hosts.
When I was a kid I used to read a lot. I mainly grew up reading stories by Shakespeare, especially the story Romeo & Juliet. That one in particular taught me a valuable life lesson. It taught me to not be surprised when my girlfriend killed herself.
The twin towers was basically angry birds but in real life
A cow went into a pride of lion’s territory? Since that moment he knew his life was on stake
What’s the difference between a knife and my life? A knife has a point.
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