One day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa smoking his cigarettes. Little Johnny asked, “Grandpa, can I smoke some of your cigarettes?” His grandpa replied, “Can your penis reach your asshole?” “No”, said Little Johnny. His grandpa replied, “Then you’re not old enough.” The next day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa drinking beer. He asked, “Grandpa, can I drink some of your beer?” His grandpa replied, “Can your penis reach your asshole?” “No” said Little Johhny. “Then you’re not old enough.” his grandpa replied. The next day, Little Johnny was eating cookies. His grandpa asked, “Can I have some of your cookies?” Little Johnny replied, “Can your penis reach your asshole?” His grandpa replied, “It most certainly can!” Little Johnny replied, "Then go f@ck yourself
Little Johnny ran into the kitchen and asked his mother "Mom can little girls have babies " his mom answered “of course not” a few minutes htm title=' his friend it’s okay we can keep playing'>later his mom heard him shout to his friend "it’s okay we can keep playing
So Little Johnny’s teacher is warned at the beginning of the school year not to ever make a bet with Johnny unless she is absolutely sure she will win it. One day in class, Johnny raises his hand and says “teacher, I’ll bet you $50 I can guess what color your underwear is.” She replies, “okay, meet me after class and we’ll settle it.” But beforeclass ends, she goes to the restroom and removes her panties. After class is over and the studentsclear out, Johnny makes his guess. “Blue.” “Nope. You got it wrong,” she says as she lifts her skirt to reveal she isn’t wearing any underwear. “Well come with me out to my dads car, he’s waiting for me, and I’ll get you the money.” She follows him out. When they get to the car she informs his dad that he got the bet wrong and that she showed Johnny that she wasn’t wearing any underwear. His dad exclaims: “That mother f@cker! He bet me $100 this morning that he’d see your pussy before the end of the day!”
Little Johhny is walking around and peaks in his parents room, catching them having sex so he asks, “What are you guys doing?” and they reply “Nothing, nothing! we’re just uh, making cake” and they send him away. So he continues walking around and he hears some strange noises coming from his brothers room so he walks in and catches his brother and his brothers girlfriend having sex and then asks him “What are you guys doing?” and his brother yells “Get out! were making cake!” So Johnny leaves and goes to his room. The next day the whole family is at the dinner table and Little Johnny turns to his sister and says “So, you and your boyfriend were making cake last night huh!” and she replies “OMG! Howd you know! ?!?” and Johnny replies “Because, I licked the icing off the couch” ayyyyyy.
Little Johnny got a train set for Christmas. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says” alright, you motherf@ckers get off here, and you motherf@ckers get off here” his mom comes rushing in and says” little Johnny, we don’t use that kind of language, go to your room and think about what you did!” After a few hours, she lets him out of his room. He goes back to play with his train set. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says,” ok, you guys get off here, and you guys get off here. And if you have any complaints about the two hour delay, take it up with the bitch in be kitchen”
Little Johnny went to the doctor to get an infection checked on his penis. As the doctor examined it, he asked," Lil Johnny how did you get an infection on your penis? " Johnny replied, “Well, the damn neighbor Sally’s braces are to sharp.”
Little Johnny’s sister Suzy sees her mom in the shower and asks what is that between your legs? Her mom responds, “That is my garage”. The next day Suzy sees her dad in the shower and says, “What is that between your legs?” Her dad answers, “It is a motorcycle that gets parked in mommy’s garage.” The next day Suzy came to dinner with blood all over her hands. Her mom asks, “Why is there blood all over your hands Suzy?” Suzy says, " Well… little Johnny tried to put his motorcycle in my garage so I ripped its wheels off."
Teacher: Little Johnny, why are you late again? Little Johnny: I had to be their for the birth of our first mixed cow, the white cow fell on the mud! (The teacher faints) Made by Evie and Peyton and Peyton’s Mom
Little jonny waked in on his mom in the shower and said what’s that on your chest mom: those are my head lights oh what’s that in between your legs mom: oh that’s my bush jonny: oh OK next he waked in on his dad in the shower he said dad what’s that in between your legs dad: oh that’s my snake jonny: oh OK that night little jonny walks in on his parents going at it and said " mom turn on his head lights there’s a snake Going in your bush
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Little Johnny is smokin’ hard, The sun looks like Mountain Dew.
Little Jonny tried phone sex but the holes was too small.
i have a little john
little johnny was late to class the teacher ask him where was he little johnny said i was on top of marry hill the a kid comes late to class and also said he was on marry hill then a little girl htm title=' who are you she said IM MARRY HILL'>thats about 4 or 5 comes in the teacher ask who are you she said IM MARRY HILL
the teacher asked the class what sound does a cow make mooo said sally good job said the teacher what sound does a sheep make baa said jack good now what sound does a pig make little johnny raised his hand really high in the sky the teacher called him he said htm title=' ur hands on ur head u black moterf@cker'>the pig says get on the ground and put ur hands on ur head u black moterf@cker
One day, little Johnny was playing with his toys and looked out the window. He saw the neighbor’s kid laying face-first in the grass. Not breathing. Little Johnny continued to shoot his nerf gun at the neighbor’s big booty cheeks. No movement at all. After little johnny went to get a snack, he looked out the window again and the kid was gone. Little Johnny went to the neighbors and said, “I’m sorry to hear that your child has gone missing.”
RUS | ENG
