Lost jokes

Today was a terrible day. My wife got hit by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver

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You know a parana can devour a small child in 30 seconds Any way I lost my job at the aquarium today

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Why does us suck at chess? we lost both our towers. Why is england so good at chess? they still have their queen. Why does russia suck at chess? they only have pawns

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My Mum texted me she had lost her phone

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What do you call a Mexican who lost his car? Carlos.

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So you know those people that commit suicide by hanging them selves I guess they lost Hangman

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I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. – A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

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One night, I saw a woman sitting behind a dumpster. So I took her home. We talked all the way there. When we got home, I gave her a bath. Later on, things started getting passionate. We started doing intercourse, and some of the noises she made you would have thought she was still alive! My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair Guess who came crawling back

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Looks like I lost an electron, I should keep a better ion them.

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Today was the worst day ever! My brother got run over, and I lost my driver’s license!

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My dad is like my virginity. I lost him at 12

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%%Why Did The Columbine High School Basketball Team Lose The Big Game? Because They Lost Their Two Best Shooters…

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I tried to find my watch I lost last week but I didn’t have the time

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What do you call a magician who has lost their magic? Ian.

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when the quiet kid lost a game of basket ball and reaches in to his bag other people in gym: oh shit this nigga bouta shot

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