what is a orphans favorite song. lost boy
Today was a terrible day. My wife got hit by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver
Why do the japanese hate Christmas??? Becasue the last time a Fat Man came down the chimney, they lost half their population
Three men are travelling through the desert when their single camel dies. They walk for a while but then it becomes night. Desperate for shelter, suddenly they stumble across a tent and inside is three beautiful women. The men were not only lost but horny too so they begin to have sex with the women. But the tent belongs to a prince and these three women were his wives so he is very angry when he arrives an hour later and sees three strangers having sex with his wives. He tells the three men he will chop off their penises as punishment, in some way relating to their job. He asks the first man what his job is: The guy says, "I’m a fireman" The prince says, "Then we’ll burn your dick off!" The second guy says, "I’m an employee at the shooting range" The prince says, "Then we’ll shoot your dick off! " The third guy smiles and says, "I’m a lollipop salesman
sans:why was the skeleton depressed? because frisk keeps reseting and it resets when he lost his phone
Where did the cat go when it lost it’s tail? – To the retail store!
“why did the Carthaginian say Rome lost the war? -because they were just roman around”
What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where’s my tractor?
Two atom soldiers are fighting against an army. One gets shot. He cried out, im hit! I think I’ve lost an electron! Are you sure? Asks the other. Im positive! This one as actually physics(unlike some other joke here, ahem cough cough)
Why does us suck at chess? we lost both our towers. Why is england so good at chess? they still have their queen. Why does russia suck at chess? they only have pawns
Two atoms are walking down the street and they run in to each other. One says to the other, “Are you all right?” “No, I lost an electron!” “Are you sure?” “Yeah, I’m positive!”
Why do Americans suck at chess… because they lost two towers Me: I have lost it. Random: Lost what? Me: My will to live.
Today was the worst day ever! My brother got run over, and I lost my driver’s license!
Yo mama so fat i stood next to her and lost cell phone reception
A man in conversation with his friend says that his wife is on a 3-week diet. The friend curiously asks, how much has she lost? The man replies, “her life.”
RUS | ENG
