Lost jokes

Looks like I lost an electron, I should keep a better ion them.

-2

-1

* * *

Today my EX got trampled by a bunch of horse and sadly I lost my job as a horse trainer.

-2

-1

My cousin: Brother I lost in a game of Call of Duty: Moe Bill [he was supposed to pronounce it as mobile however I left it as it is] Me: so tell me about it then. My cousin: I lost to Sum_Baldi Me: somebody? Don’t they have like the name of you opponents? My cousin: no no no the name was Sum_Baldi. S.U.M_B.A.L.D.I Me: Ok my bad. Continue My cousin: I got Sum_Baldi and 5 seconds later I got kill but [by] Sum_Fing_Wong. Me: it’s not wrong! In call of duty, you are suppose to kill or be killed. My cousin: no no no the name was Sum_Fing_Wong. S.U.M_F.I.N.G_W.O.N.G Me: my bad again. Do continue. My cousin: I got so angry I blowup Me: so you got blowed up, by what weapon? My cousin: by the game. Me: [was not expecting that for an answer]

-2

-1

* * *

“You look like you’ve lost some weight.” “Really? Well, whatever weight I lost, you found it, pal!”

-2

-1

* * *

Yo mama so fat i stood next to her and lost cell phone reception

-2

-1

* * *

Why does us suck at chess? we lost both our towers. Why is england so good at chess? they still have their queen. Why does russia suck at chess? they only have pawns

-2

-1

* * *

Today was the worst day ever! My brother got run over, and I lost my driver’s license!

-2

-1

* * *

Why do Americans suck at chess… because they lost two towers Me: I have lost it. Random: Lost what? Me: My will to live.

-2

-1

I lost my black friend in the shadows. I lost my white friend on the wall. I lost my Asian friend in the sand and I lost my Islamic friend in the bombings.

-2

-1

* * *

Stephen Hawking died because he accidentaly lost his bluetooth connection

-2

-1

* * *

What dose an Orphan and a lost kid have in comen. They have no way home

-2

-1

* * *

I lost a race with a handicapped person today. The problem was the race was all stairs. Gravity sure is fast