Milk jokes

A farmer walks up to his farmer neighbor with a jug of milk. the farmer says “I milked your cow”. the neighbor replies “i have a bull not a cow”

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You wanna know what i want for Christmas? My dad to come back with the milk he said he was gonna get.

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Why did Cleopatra bathe in milk? She couldn’t find a cow tall enough to have a shower.

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Child: drinking milk Farmer: hey, what are you doing? Child: oh I just milked one of your cows Farmer: We don’t have any cows, we only have bulls Child: realizes

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A father is listening to his daughter say her prayers before bed. The daughter says “God bless Mummy and God Bless Daddy and God bless Grandma and good bye Grandad.” The father says, “Good bye Grandad? Why is that?” The daughter says, “Just because I felt like it.” The next day, Grandad drops dead. The father can’t believe the coincidence, but decided not to question it. That night, he listens to the daughter’s prayers again. She says, “God bless Mummy and God bless Daddy and goodbye Grandma.” The father is shocked again and asks his daughter why, but she says again, “Just because I felt like it.” The next day, the Grandma drops dead and now the Father is getting worried but doesn’t know what to do, so he tries to forget about it. That night, he listens to his daughter again and she says, “God bless Mummy and goodbye Daddy.” The father is now terrified and goes to work the next day sweating, cancels all of his meetings, and hides in his office for the whole day. He doesn’t go home and stays there until midnight. He’s very surprised. ‘I’ve cheated death!’ he thinks to himself, then rushes home. His wife asks, “Where have you been?!” and the husband says, “Oh don’t ask me any questions, today’s been miserable.” The wife replies, “Your days been miserable? Well, listen to my day! Firstly, the milk man drops dead on the porch…”

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Kid: Dad where are you going Dad: To get milk TEN YEARS LATER Kids friend: wheres your dad Kid: he went to get milk but never came back

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why do orphans eat cereal with water? because their dad never came home with the milk

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