Did you guys see on the news where they arrested that pervert at the Michaels Crafts store?? He was running around completely naked and had sprinkled glitter all over his testicles. I guess it was pretty nuts.
What is the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Well beer nuts are 49 cents but deer nuts are just under a buck. (If you don’t understand the genders of deer you won’t understand it.)
They say during sex you burn offas many calories as running 8 miles. Who the f@ck runs 8 miles in 30 seconds
Anybody know a girl named Candice? she just added me on snap
What do squirrels and men have in common? They always want a nut.
can i put deez nuts in yo cluts?
A GUY GOES TO SEE HIS PSYCHIATRIST DRESSED ONLY IN BUBBLE WRAP. WHEN HE GETS THERE HE ASKED THE PSYCH, cAN YOU PLEASE HELP ME? THE PSYCH SAYS NO, I’M SORRY, I CAN CLEARLY SEE YOUR NUTS. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. “But why?” they asked, as they moved off. “Because”, he said, “I can’t stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer.”
What do you call a nut on a Wheelchair?..a busted nut.
What do you call a vegan slut…? A garden Ho…!
One day little johnny went to his grandma’s house and she asks “do you like nuts” and little johnny says “yes i like nuts” and his grandma says “okay then grab them out of the cabinet” so little johnny went and grabbed them and he was sad after he grabbed them his grandma then says “whats wrong? ” little johnny says “i thought they were real nuts.” and his grandma fainted.
What do you call a Dino stripper? A dinowhore
my best friend got ligma (ah did he, sorry bro) LIGMA BALLS
“hey what’s the russian president’s name?” “putin?” “yeah, putin deez nuts in yo mouth”
When you throw your peanut butter sandwich at the nut allergy table 25+ kill streak
I nutted on the wall, call that a walnut.
RUS | ENG
