Nut jokes

There is a kid in my class who is allergic to peanuts. He says hes gay- he can’t be tho… he’s allergic to nuts!

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What did one nut say to the other? Ignore the guy in the middle. He’s a d!ck.

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When you throw your peanut butter sandwich at the nut allergy table 25+ kill streak

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A penis has a sad life. His hair is a mess. His family is nuts. His neighbor is an asshole. His best friend is a pussy. And his owner beats him.

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What do squirrels and men have in common? They always want a nut.

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Anybody know a girl named Candice? she just added me on snap

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I have a pun, but I will nut-tella you!

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2 nuts were chasing each other. One said to the other “I’m-a cashew!”

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Are you a walnut because I’m about to nut all over your walls!

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Yo girl…do you like squirrels, because i’m about to nut in your hole

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I nutted on the wall, call that a walnut.

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my best friend got ligma (ah did he, sorry bro) LIGMA BALLS

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have you seen the xbox game sea of thieves?sea if these nuts fit on yo mouth

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Why did the squirrel do the backstroke? He wanted to keep his nuts dry.

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If you are what you eat, does that mean all squirrels are nuts?

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