A penis has a sad life. His hair is a mess. His family is nuts. His neighbor is an asshole. His best friend is a pussy. And his owner beats him.
2 nuts were chasing each other. One said to the other “I’m-a cashew!”
Me: Do you like smash? Friend: Smash Rolls? Me: No, Smash DEEZ NUTS! Friend: AHHHHH (*moans)
What did the wind say to the palm tree? Hold onto your nuts this is no ordinary blow job.
I nutted on the wall, call that a walnut.
When you throw your peanut butter sandwich at the nut allergy table 25+ kill streak
What did one nut say to the other? Ignore the guy in the middle. He’s a d!ck.
I have a pun, but I will nut-tella you!
One day little johnny went to his grandma’s house and she asks “do you like nuts” and little johnny says “yes i like nuts” and his grandma says “okay then grab them out of the cabinet” so little johnny went and grabbed them and he was sad after he grabbed them his grandma then says “whats wrong? ” little johnny says “i thought they were real nuts.” and his grandma fainted.
A pirate walks into a bar and has a ship’s wheel in his pants. The bartender asks, “What’s with the wheel in your pants?” The pirate replies, “Yarrr! It’s drivin’ me nuts!”
DEEEZ NUTS
“hey what’s the russian president’s name?” “putin?” “yeah, putin deez nuts in yo mouth”
There is a new kind of jock strap, it only holds one nut. It is called a trump supporter.
What do you call a nut stuck to a wall? A walnut.
What is smagma name
RUS | ENG
