Q, Why did the elephant paint his toenails red? A, To hide up cherry trees. Q, What’s the loudest noise in the jungle? A, Giraffes eating cherries.
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. “Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?” The blonde said, “How about 50 dollars?” The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man’s wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, “Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?” The man replied, “She should. She was standing on the porch.” A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money. “You’re finished already?” he asked. “Yes,” the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. “And by the way,” the blonde added, “that’s not a Porch, it’s a Ferrari.”
My young son saw trump on TV he asked “Why is the man on TV painted orange?” I replied “Son when Russia pays that much for equipment, They don’t want it to rust”
How to decorate a wall: Strip of the paper and original plaster put on fresh plaster and wall paper paint it (if you want) Send a bill to North America and wait patiently for a reply
A father and a son were painting pictures together, the son and father were drawing the exact same thing to a T and the son said “what happened to your hand?” looking at the scar tissue near the father’s knuckle, the father replied with “you know what happened, you were there.” the son continues to deny this until they both finish their paintings - they’re exactly the same. The father passes out for a few hours and wakes up to find that there’s only one painting.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? - Depends on how big they are and how hard you throw them.
how many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them
What’s the difference between a painting and jesus? A painting only needs one nail.
What does it take to paint a wall red? Kurt Cobain and his shotgun.
What do Painters and Prostitutes have in common? They’re both paid for a good finish…
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? One, if you throw it hard enough.
Boom boom acka-lacka lacka boom Boom boom acka-lacka boom boom
How do you paint a wall red? You shoot a baby with a .50 cal
How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw em
what do Bob Ross’s painting and the orphanage have in common. They’re both filled with happy little accidents…
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