Paint jokes

What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.

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How many babies do you need to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. “Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?” The blonde said, “How about 50 dollars?” The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man’s wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, “Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?” The man replied, “She should. She was standing on the porch.” A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money. “You’re finished already?” he asked. “Yes,” the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. “And by the way,” the blonde added, “that’s not a Porch, it’s a Ferrari.”

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Why did the bald man paint rabbits on his head? Because from a distance, they looked like hare.

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Always practice safe sex: paint an x on the sheep that kick.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? It depends on how hard you through them. ????

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Two kids walked into a bar, they were covered with blood. the bartender asked what happened. The youngest said “Well, we we’re trying to paint our basement but we threw the babies too hard”.

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i will never forget my little brothers last word rip. his last words: paint dosent taste good

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall. Depends on how hard you throw them.with fuk.

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My Xbox has been acting up lately… So I painted it black to make it run faster

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hi guys I’m back! So I have a question for u. What is red aND smells like blue paint type in comments what u came up with

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