Poor jokes

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Paddy and Seamus work at the Guinness factory and Seamus has a horrible accident and dies at work. Paddy agrees to tell Seamuswife the bad news. He knocks on the door and Seamus wife answers. " Whats happened Paddy?" Paddy frowns. " Im sorry to say poor Seamus fell into the Guinness vat and drowned, im so sorry." She started to cry and asked paddy: " Did he at least die quickly? " Seamus shook his head, " No, he got out 3 times for a pee."

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Being a man that is poor really isn’t that bad as long as you are involved in the world’s oldest profession and you are well-endowed and you are not homophobic and as long as you can suck the chrome off a tailpipe then you have nothing to worry about if you are desperate enough to pay your bills ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? lack of money is the root of all evil ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ???? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ???? ??

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because these jokes are not funny Heres why the chicken crossed the road… The chicken was on the run from a crazy-ass butcher ready to murder the poor thing, so the chicken crossed the road.The chicken was crossing the road, then a blind kid saw the chicken, and the kid was hit by a flying rock, his vision was blurred (what vision?) and was actually cured of the blind. The chicken ran and jumped into a truck’s opening, and was never seen again… The kid got up from the ground and looked at the road, to see the chicken was not there, and said…" The chicken crossed the road…" The kid yelled at everyone about the chicken crossing the road, and got a lot of positive attention. Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and reddit was full of the chicken nonsense, and gained widespread attention from N.A to Asia in only 1 day. The butcher was arrested for the attempted murder of a joke animal, and was sentenced to over 20 years in solitary confinement, and a few weeks later, the sentence was moved to a life sentence, and the butcher became known as The ChicKiller. The End (hope you enjoyed, i was bored so i made this shit…)

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One afternoon, a man was walking to a bar after work. Across the street, an Irish nun stood there waving her arms at the man. “Look at this poor drunkard! The Lord does not love him! He will be sent to Hell!” the nun shouted. The man walked over to the nun. “Hey! I had a hard day at work! I was going to get ONE beer! Have you ever even tried a drink before?” the man asked. The nun looked down and shook her head. “Well, if you tried it, you would probably like it! Would you want to try something?” the man asked. The nun replied, “Okay, only one thing.” “What would you like?” asked the man. He offered her beer and whiskey, but she declined. “How about a little gin?” the man concluded. “Okay, sure. But, can you ask them to put it in a mug so people don’t see what I’m drinking?” asked the nun. “Fine,” the man walks into the bar and waves to the bartender. “Hey, can I have a bottle of beer and a bit of gin? Also, can that be in a mug?” asked the man. The bartender looked up, with fury in his eyes. “Don’t tell me that damn nun is out there again!” the bartender said.

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I’m so poor, that when people come over to my house, I come out the window and say Ding Dong!

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Today I donated my watch, phone, and $500 to a poor guy. You wouldn’t believe the happiness I felt as he slid the pistol back into his pocket.

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Once upon a time there was a poor man, a middle class man, and a rich man. They were all talking about how they found happiness in their lives. The rich man said “I found happiness through money and all of my assets.” The middle class man said “I found happiness through my steady job and my loving household.” The poor man said “I may not have much, but I find my happiness through the little acts of kindness people show me. ” And then the wall fell on them.

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stranger. do you want a lollipop. kid. no i hate lolipops so yeah and you are not my daddy.

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So my friends birthday was coming up, so I got him a new box to live in.

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