Priest jokes

Johnny is walking along and a priest is coming the other way. Johnny says, “Hey, mister, why are you wearing your collar backwards?” The priest says, “Because I’m a father.” Johnny says, “Yeah? Well, my old man’s got three kids and he don’t wear his collar backwards.” The priest says “You don’t understand, son. I have thousands of children. ” Johnny says, “You should wear your f@ckin’ trousers backwards.”

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A little girl beinng Girl: “Forgive me Father for I have sinned” Priest: “What did you do Child?” Girl: “I called a man a son of a bitch.” Priest: “Why did you call him a son of a bitch?” Girl: “Because he touched my hand.” Priest: “Like this?” (as he touches her hand) Girl: “Yes father.” Priest: “That’s no reason to call a man a son of a bitch.” Girl: “Then he touched my breast.” Priest: “Like this?” (as he touched her breast) Girl: “Yes father.” Priest: “That’s no reason to call him a son of a bitch.” Girl: “Then he took off my clothes, father.” Priest: “Like this?” (as he takes off her clothes) Girl: “Yes father.” Priest: “That’s no reason to call him a son of a bitch.” Girl: “Then he stuck his you know what into my you know where.” Priest: “Like this?” (as he stuck his you know what into her you know where) Girl: “YES FATHER, YES FATHER, YES FATHER!!!” Priest: (after a few minutes): “That’s no reason to call him a son of a bitch. ” Girl: “But father he had AIDS!” Priest: “THAT SON OF A BITCH!!!”

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What’s the difference between a Catholic Priest and a pedophile? One is Catholic

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What do a girl and a bar have in common? A- Liquor in the front poker in the back!!

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A wise man once said, "don’t think young, think tight" He was priest.

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What is different about priests and acne. Acne waits until your 13 to cum on your face

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Why do Priests like playing the violin? They get to finger A minor.

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How do you get a nun pregnant? – Dress her up as an alter boy.

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A married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover comes over, she puts her nine year old son in the closet. One day, the woman hears a car in the driveway and puts her lover in the closet with her son. Inside the closet, the little boy says, “It’s dark in here, isn’t it?” “Yes it is,” the man replies. “You wanna buy a baseball?” the little boy

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What’s the difference between a priest and target? Nothing, they both have children’s pants half off.

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When a Muslim dies he gets 72 virgins. It’s the same thing with priests except the virgins are children.

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Why did Rolf Harris meet underage kids? To tie his kangaroo down sport

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What is a reverse exorcism? It is when the Devil tries to pull a priest out of a child.

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What is a priests favorite song? – Magic flute in A minor

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