Priest jokes

There was a man named, Matt, that went to the church to confess one of his most recent sins. He told the priest, I am here to tell you my sins. He was all for it and said go ahead. Matt, “Father, Last night I almost cheated on my wife” Priest, “how so?” Matt, “We were together naked, but we didn’t do anything just rubbed each other, that’s all” Priest, " RUBBING TOGETHER IS THE SAME THING AS PUTTING IT IN! for your sins you must never see that woman again and put $50 in the donation box" Matt, “okay i promise not to see her again” Then Matt walks out the door Priest, “Hey I saw you! you didn’t put any money in the donation box!!” Matt, “Yes I did, I took the money and rubbed it against the box because you said rubbing it is the same thing as putting it in”

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Man walks up to a priest. The man says “I am Jesus Christ.” The priest says “No you are not my son.” The man says " Follow me. " The man walks into the bar and the bartender says “Jesus Christ your back!”

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Do you know where priests go at night??? To all night sale a boys r us

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Why did Rolf Harris meet underage kids? To tie his kangaroo down sport

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What do you call a reverse exorsism. It’s where a demon pulls a priest out of a child

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What’s the opposite of an exorcism? It’s when Satan has to tell the priest to come out of the child.

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What’s the difference between a priest and a rabbi, the rabbi cuts it off the the priest sucks it off

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What to gift a child molester , who already has everything ? A bigger county with more believers

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What is a reverse exorcism? It is when the Devil tries to pull a priest out of a child.

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