Priest jokes

girl: daddy ive been a bad girl priest: for the last time its father I have sinned

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I was raised a Catholic and my priest told me when I was 12, “God is watching you when you masturbate”. I said, “Is God a pedophile too, Father?”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2


Say all you want about priests but at least they drive slowly in school zones On a hot summers day a famous celebrity tweeted " it is a beautiful day and I`m deciding which kid to have fun with today" to which the local priest replied " I too am deciding which of your kids to have fun with today".

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

A married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover comes over, she puts her nine year old son in the closet. One day, the woman hears a car in the driveway and puts her lover in the closet with her son. Inside the closet, the little boy says, “It’s dark in here, isn’t it?” “Yes it is,” the man replies. “You wanna buy a baseball?” the little boy

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I hated church growing up as a child, it was always standing, kneeling, sitting, standing, kneeling, sitting. I wish the priest would just pick a position and f*** me!

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What do Catholic priests and school shooters have in common? They both like to dump their loads into little kids.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

A Muslim is about to commit suicide when a Catholic priest stops him “What are you doing?!” Exclaims the priest “There is nothing on this Earth for me.” The Muslim says “I will commit suicide to go to paradise and get 72 virgins!” The priest shakes his head “Foolish Muslim, suicide is not the way! ” He says “Follow me, Ill take you to the local primary school.”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2


-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Do you know where priests go at night??? To all night sale a boys r us

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What’s the opposite of an exorcism? It’s when Satan has to tell the priest to come out of the child.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

A wise man once said, "don’t think young, think tight" He was priest.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Roast: What is the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus? One is hairy and smells like fish and the other is a walrus. Your welcome What is the difference between a Catholic priest and Acne? – Acne comes on your face after you turn 13.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *


© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2026