The worst part about church is that you’re constantly switching between sitting, standing and kneeling; I mean, why can’t the priest just pick a position and f**k me already! A priest asks the convicted murderer at the electric chair, “Any last requests? ” “Yes,” replied the murderer, “Will you please hold my hand?”
Why do priests like kids in wheelchairs? - Because they can’t run.
There’s a plane going down over the desert with only 3 parachutes on board. There are four people onboard, the smartest man in the world, the best doctor in the world, an old priest, and a young nerd. The doctor says, “People need me for my medical skills.” grabs the first parachute pack, and jumps. The smartest man in the world says, “People need me for my intelligence.” grabs a pack, and jumps. The old priest says, “I have lived a long and happy life. You take the last chute.” The nerd says, “Don’t worry. There are enough chutes for the both of us. The smartest man in the world just grabbed my backpack.”
prst
what does a Catholic Priest and a commercial from the 80s have in common they both ask people “WHERES THE MEAT!”
A little girl beinng Girl: “Forgive me Father for I have sinned” Priest: “What did you do Child?” Girl: “I called a man a son of a bitch.” Priest: “Why did you call him a son of a bitch?” Girl: “Because he touched my hand.” Priest: “Like this?” (as he touches her hand) Girl: “Yes father.” Priest: “That’s no reason to call a man a son of a bitch.” Girl: “Then he touched my breast.” Priest: “Like this?” (as he touched her breast) Girl: “Yes father.” Priest: “That’s no reason to call him a son of a bitch.” Girl: “Then he took off my clothes, father.” Priest: “Like this?” (as he takes off her clothes) Girl: “Yes father.” Priest: “That’s no reason to call him a son of a bitch.” Girl: “Then he stuck his you know what into my you know where.” Priest: “Like this?” (as he stuck his you know what into her you know where) Girl: “YES FATHER, YES FATHER, YES FATHER!!!” Priest: (after a few minutes): “That’s no reason to call him a son of a bitch. ” Girl: “But father he had AIDS!” Priest: “THAT SON OF A BITCH!!!”
What’s the similarity between Catholic Priests and Mcdonalds ? They both like sticking there meat in 6 year old buns.
A wise man once said, "don’t think young, think tight" He was priest.
What does a priest and a clown have in common? They both make children cry
What do a girl and a bar have in common? A- Liquor in the front poker in the back!!
my uncle was a preist he had a two-inch penis but when it was in my ass it felt like a torpedo
What does a priest and a wristwatch have in common? - they both start at 12.
What’s the difference between a priest and a rabbi, the rabbi cuts it off the the priest sucks it off
What is a reverse exorcism? It is when the Devil tries to pull a priest out of a child.
A priest and a pedophile walk into a bar. The bar tender says “Hey Jim!”
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