What to gift a child molester , who already has everything ? A bigger county with more believers
What do you call an orphan who grows up to become a priest? Father les.
The worst part about church is that you’re constantly switching between sitting, standing and kneeling; I mean, why can’t the priest just pick a position and f**k me already! A priest asks the convicted murderer at the electric chair, “Any last requests? ” “Yes,” replied the murderer, “Will you please hold my hand?”
What do you call a reverse exorsism. It’s where a demon pulls a priest out of a child
What do priest and doctors have in common? They both do physicals on kids.
What do you call an orphan who grows up and becomes a priest? Father Les.
What’s the difference between a Catholic priest and a zit? A zit will wait until you’re twelve before it comes on your face.
A wise man once said, "don’t think young, think tight" He was priest.
3 nuns are talking and the first nun says, “u would never believe what i discovered.” intrigued, the other to signal her to continue. " i found a phone in the priests room." said the first nun. “oh thats nothing said the second one, i found condoms in one of his drawers.” said the second one. " what did u do with them." said the first nun. pridefully the second nun responds with, " i poked holes in all of them." and the third nun says, “oh sh*t…”
What is the difference between a Priest and a Doctor The Doctor doesn’t like to give physicals.
Why do priests appreciate educated children? They don’t spit.
I was raised a Catholic and my priest told me when I was 12, “God is watching you when you masturbate”. I said, “Is God a pedophile too, Father?”
There was a man named, Matt, that went to the church to confess one of his most recent sins. He told the priest, I am here to tell you my sins. He was all for it and said go ahead. Matt, “Father, Last night I almost cheated on my wife” Priest, “how so?” Matt, “We were together naked, but we didn’t do anything just rubbed each other, that’s all” Priest, " RUBBING TOGETHER IS THE SAME THING AS PUTTING IT IN! for your sins you must never see that woman again and put $50 in the donation box" Matt, “okay i promise not to see her again” Then Matt walks out the door Priest, “Hey I saw you! you didn’t put any money in the donation box!!” Matt, “Yes I did, I took the money and rubbed it against the box because you said rubbing it is the same thing as putting it in”
They should add an eleventh commandment to the Bible: Thou shalt not f… altar boys
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