How come I have a father but not a dad? He was a priest.
Did you hear about the new Exorcist movie? The Devil came to get the Priest out of the child.
Why are priests called father? because its too suspicious to call them daddy.
Two priests are in a bar one says to the other priest Ill swap you 2 5 for a 10
What’s the difference between a priest and acne? At least acne waits til the boy is 12 to come on his face.
Father O’Reilly ran into a young woman whose mother attended his church at the market. “Ah Mary Agnes, congratulations!” She gave him a puzzled look. “on what?” “Your mother tells me you’ve been praying to St. Gerard and finally got pregnant, it’s a miracle.” Mary Agnes sighed. “My mother needs to get hearing aids if she’s going to eavesdrop on my phone calls to friends. I said it’ll be a miracle if I get pregnant since the only thing I’m f@cking is a St. Bernard.”
What’s the opposite of an exorcism? It’s when Satan has to tell the priest to come out of the child.
Man walks up to a priest. The man says “I am Jesus Christ.” The priest says “No you are not my son.” The man says " Follow me. " The man walks into the bar and the bartender says “Jesus Christ your back!”
What’s the similarity between Catholic Priests and Mcdonalds ? They both like sticking there meat in 6 year old buns.
What does a priest and a clown have in common? They both make children cry
A priest and a nun are traveling across the desert on a camel and when all the sudden the camel dies. They’re in the middle of the desert with no hope of rescue when that night the priest thinks to himself that he can’t die a virgin. He looks over at the nun and pulls out his penis. The nun says father what is that? He says this sister is the wand of life. The nun says good, now go stick it in that camels ass and let’s get the hell outa here!
I hated church growing up as a child, it was always standing, kneeling, sitting, standing, kneeling, sitting. I wish the priest would just pick a position and f*** me!
What do Catholic priests and school shooters have in common? They both like to dump their loads into little kids.
What is different about priests and acne. Acne waits until your 13 to cum on your face
What’s the difference between a peanut and a priest? With a peanut, you have to break the shell open for the nut to come out.
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