Priest jokes

what does a Catholic Priest and a commercial from the 80s have in common they both ask people “WHERES THE MEAT!”

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What do catholic priests and JCPennys have in common? Little boys pants half off.

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What is a reverse exorcism? It is when the Devil tries to pull a priest out of a child.

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A married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover comes over, she puts her nine year old son in the closet. One day, the woman hears a car in the driveway and puts her lover in the closet with her son. Inside the closet, the little boy says, “It’s dark in here, isn’t it?” “Yes it is,” the man replies. “You wanna buy a baseball?” the little boy

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What’s the difference between a drill and a priest? Nothing they both like screwing stuff!

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What’s the difference between a priest and acne? At least acne waits til the boy is 12 to come on his face.

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Why is that kid walking like that?, Oh, he’s an alter boy

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What do a girl and a bar have in common? A- Liquor in the front poker in the back!!

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A little girl beinng Girl: “Forgive me Father for I have sinned” Priest: “What did you do Child?” Girl: “I called a man a son of a bitch.” Priest: “Why did you call him a son of a bitch?” Girl: “Because he touched my hand.” Priest: “Like this?” (as he touches her hand) Girl: “Yes father.” Priest: “That’s no reason to call a man a son of a bitch.” Girl: “Then he touched my breast.” Priest: “Like this?” (as he touched her breast) Girl: “Yes father.” Priest: “That’s no reason to call him a son of a bitch.” Girl: “Then he took off my clothes, father.” Priest: “Like this?” (as he takes off her clothes) Girl: “Yes father.” Priest: “That’s no reason to call him a son of a bitch.” Girl: “Then he stuck his you know what into my you know where.” Priest: “Like this?” (as he stuck his you know what into her you know where) Girl: “YES FATHER, YES FATHER, YES FATHER!!!” Priest: (after a few minutes): “That’s no reason to call him a son of a bitch. ” Girl: “But father he had AIDS!” Priest: “THAT SON OF A BITCH!!!”

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A priest and a rabbi run out of a burning church and the Priest says “what about the children” the rabbi says “f@ck the children” and the Priest says "do you think we’ll have time

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What to gift a child molester , who already has everything ? A bigger county with more believers

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What do you get when you combine a priest and lawyer? A Father in law

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Do you know where priests go at night??? To all night sale a boys r us

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Say all you want about priests but at least they drive slowly in school zones On a hot summers day a famous celebrity tweeted " it is a beautiful day and I`m deciding which kid to have fun with today" to which the local priest replied " I too am deciding which of your kids to have fun with today".

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girl: daddy ive been a bad girl priest: for the last time its father I have sinned

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