What do you call a reverse exorsism. It’s where a demon pulls a priest out of a child
prst
What’s the difference between a peanut and a priest? With a peanut, you have to break the shell open for the nut to come out.
There was a man named, Matt, that went to the church to confess one of his most recent sins. He told the priest, I am here to tell you my sins. He was all for it and said go ahead. Matt, “Father, Last night I almost cheated on my wife” Priest, “how so?” Matt, “We were together naked, but we didn’t do anything just rubbed each other, that’s all” Priest, " RUBBING TOGETHER IS THE SAME THING AS PUTTING IT IN! for your sins you must never see that woman again and put $50 in the donation box" Matt, “okay i promise not to see her again” Then Matt walks out the door Priest, “Hey I saw you! you didn’t put any money in the donation box!!” Matt, “Yes I did, I took the money and rubbed it against the box because you said rubbing it is the same thing as putting it in”
One day, a priest is walking down the street and sees a little girl with a box. “What’s in the box?”, the priest asks. “Christian kittens”, the little girl answers. Pleased, the priest smiles and continues on his way. A week later, the same priest is walking down the street with a nun when he sees the little girl and the box again. “Ask her what she has in the box”, he says, “It’s the cutest thing!” The nun walks up and asks the girl what she has in the box. “Atheist kittens”, she says. The priest rushes forward and says "ATHEIST KITTENS!!! Last week you said they were “Christian kittens! !!” “They were”, she says. “Now their eyes are open”.
When a Muslim dies he gets 72 virgins. It’s the same thing with priests except the virgins are children.
Roast: What is the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus? One is hairy and smells like fish and the other is a walrus. Your welcome What is the difference between a Catholic priest and Acne? – Acne comes on your face after you turn 13.
Boy goes to Confession Boy " What are you doing father" Priest “Its called masturbation and soon you will be doing htm title=' father Priest Cause my hand is getting tired”'>it" Boy " Why do you say that father" Priest " Cause my hand is getting tired”
How come I have a father but not a dad? He was a priest.
What did the choir boy sing to the priest? Nothing his mouth was full.
What is the difference between a Priest and a Doctor The Doctor doesn’t like to give physicals.
The worst part about church is that you’re constantly switching between sitting, standing and kneeling; I mean, why can’t the priest just pick a position and f**k me already! A priest asks the convicted murderer at the electric chair, “Any last requests? ” “Yes,” replied the murderer, “Will you please hold my hand?”
What’s the difference between a Catholic priest and a zit? A zit will wait until you’re twelve before it comes on your face.
3 nuns are talking and the first nun says, “u would never believe what i discovered.” intrigued, the other to signal her to continue. " i found a phone in the priests room." said the first nun. “oh thats nothing said the second one, i found condoms in one of his drawers.” said the second one. " what did u do with them." said the first nun. pridefully the second nun responds with, " i poked holes in all of them." and the third nun says, “oh sh*t…”
What does a priest and a wristwatch have in common? - they both start at 12.
RUS | ENG
