Priest jokes

What is a priests favorite song? – Magic flute in A minor

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A married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover comes over, she puts her nine year old son in the closet. One day, the woman hears a car in the driveway and puts her lover in the closet with her son. Inside the closet, the little boy says, “It’s dark in here, isn’t it?” “Yes it is,” the man replies. “You wanna buy a baseball?” the little boy

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Roses are red, don’t touch the toys, these are what the priests use to lure in the boys.

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A Muslim is about to commit suicide when a Catholic priest stops him “What are you doing?!” Exclaims the priest “There is nothing on this Earth for me.” The Muslim says “I will commit suicide to go to paradise and get 72 virgins!” The priest shakes his head “Foolish Muslim, suicide is not the way! ” He says “Follow me, Ill take you to the local primary school.”

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Why are priests called father? because its too suspicious to call them daddy.

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girl: daddy ive been a bad girl priest: for the last time its father I have sinned

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Baptism, a chance for the priest to bathe you.

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Did you hear about the new Exorcist movie? The Devil came to get the Priest out of the child.

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When a Muslim dies he gets 72 virgins. It’s the same thing with priests except the virgins are children.

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What do catholic priests and JCPennys have in common? Little boys pants half off.

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One day, a priest is walking down the street and sees a little girl with a box. “What’s in the box?”, the priest asks. “Christian kittens”, the little girl answers. Pleased, the priest smiles and continues on his way. A week later, the same priest is walking down the street with a nun when he sees the little girl and the box again. “Ask her what she has in the box”, he says, “It’s the cutest thing!” The nun walks up and asks the girl what she has in the box. “Atheist kittens”, she says. The priest rushes forward and says "ATHEIST KITTENS!!! Last week you said they were “Christian kittens! !!” “They were”, she says. “Now their eyes are open”.

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What is different about priests and acne. Acne waits until your 13 to cum on your face

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What’s the difference between a priest and acne? At least acne waits til the boy is 12 to come on his face.

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What’s a similarity between The Ark of the Covenant, The Holy Grail and a bunch of 12 year olds? They are all locked in the Priest’s basement.

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How come I have a father but not a dad? He was a priest.

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