Priest jokes

What to gift a child molester , who already has everything ? A bigger county with more believers

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Ten Catholic priests all die in a bus accident. When they arrive at the pearly gates, St. Peter acknowledges them. He sees that they’re all priests and immediately says "If any of you are pedophiles, there’s no point waiting here. You might as well eff off straight to hell right now!” Nine of the priests turn around and begin to walk away. St. Peter calls after them, "AND TAKE THE DEAF BASTARD WITH YOU TOO!”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

Baptism, a chance for the priest to bathe you.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What’s the difference between a Catholic priest and a zit? A zit will wait until you’re twelve before it comes on your face.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What do priest and doctors have in common? They both do physicals on kids.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

A married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover comes over, she puts her nine year old son in the closet. One day, the woman hears a car in the driveway and puts her lover in the closet with her son. Inside the closet, the little boy says, “It’s dark in here, isn’t it?” “Yes it is,” the man replies. “You wanna buy a baseball?” the little boy

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What’s a similarity between The Ark of the Covenant, The Holy Grail and a bunch of 12 year olds? They are all locked in the Priest’s basement.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What do you call a catholic priest who molests children? A catholic priest

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

The worst part about church is that you’re constantly switching between sitting, standing and kneeling; I mean, why can’t the priest just pick a position and f**k me already! A priest asks the convicted murderer at the electric chair, “Any last requests? ” “Yes,” replied the murderer, “Will you please hold my hand?”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Whats the difference between a Silver Medal and a Priest? They both came in a little behind.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

my uncle was a preist he had a two-inch penis but when it was in my ass it felt like a torpedo

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why do priests like kids in wheelchairs? - Because they can’t run.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

A priest is drowning in a river… A boat comes along and asks to help him. He says “leave me alone, god will save me.” The next day another boat came along and asked to help him. Again he said "leave me alone, god will save me. " The next day the last boat came and asked to help him. Once again he told the boat that god will save him. The next day he died. He went to heaven and asked god "why didn’t you save me. " God said "I sent you three f*****ing boats and you didn’t take them! "

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Have you heard of the new sequel to “the exorcist”? A woman hires the devil to get a priest out of her son

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

one day a priest loses his cock (chicken) he goes to the church and says “who has seen a cock” all the woman raised their hands “no who has seen a cock that is not theirs” half the woman’s htm title=' my cock” all the nuns hands went up'>hands went up “NO NO NO who has seen my cock” all the nuns hands went up

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
- up - << N E X T! >> random

© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2026