Priest jokes

What do catholic priests and JCPennys have in common? Little boys pants half off.

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What do you call an orphan who grows up to become a priest? Father les.

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There was a man named, Matt, that went to the church to confess one of his most recent sins. He told the priest, I am here to tell you my sins. He was all for it and said go ahead. Matt, “Father, Last night I almost cheated on my wife” Priest, “how so?” Matt, “We were together naked, but we didn’t do anything just rubbed each other, that’s all” Priest, " RUBBING TOGETHER IS THE SAME THING AS PUTTING IT IN! for your sins you must never see that woman again and put $50 in the donation box" Matt, “okay i promise not to see her again” Then Matt walks out the door Priest, “Hey I saw you! you didn’t put any money in the donation box!!” Matt, “Yes I did, I took the money and rubbed it against the box because you said rubbing it is the same thing as putting it in”

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Boy goes to Confession Boy " What are you doing father" Priest “Its called masturbation and soon you will be doing htm title=' father Priest Cause my hand is getting tired”'>it" Boy " Why do you say that father" Priest " Cause my hand is getting tired”

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What do you call a catholic priest who molests children? A catholic priest

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Whats The Difference Between A Rabi And A Priest One Cuts Them Off And One Sucks Them Off

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A priest and a nun are traveling across the desert on a camel and when all the sudden the camel dies. They’re in the middle of the desert with no hope of rescue when that night the priest thinks to himself that he can’t die a virgin. He looks over at the nun and pulls out his penis. The nun says father what is that? He says this sister is the wand of life. The nun says good, now go stick it in that camels ass and let’s get the hell outa here!

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Ten Catholic priests all die in a bus accident. When they arrive at the pearly gates, St. Peter acknowledges them. He sees that they’re all priests and immediately says "If any of you are pedophiles, there’s no point waiting here. You might as well eff off straight to hell right now!” Nine of the priests turn around and begin to walk away. St. Peter calls after them, "AND TAKE THE DEAF BASTARD WITH YOU TOO!”

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A priest and a pedophile walk into a bar. The bar tender says “Hey Jim!”

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Why do priests like kids in wheelchairs? - Because they can’t run.

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How do you get a nun pregnant? – Dress her up as an alter boy.

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What does a priest and a wristwatch have in common? - they both start at 12.

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What is a reverse exorcism? It is when the Devil tries to pull a priest out of a child.

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Do you know where priests go at night??? To all night sale a boys r us

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What’s the difference between a priest and acne? At least acne waits til the boy is 12 to come on his face.

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