Priest jokes

There are Three Sons Journey Korean and Little Joe. They were trapped on a floating island and a priest gave them each one wish the first son wished to go back to the ground. The Second Son wished to go back to the ground. The third son was lonely and wished for his two brothers to come back to the floating island.

What is the difference between a Priest and a Doctor The Doctor doesn’t like to give physicals.

Whats The Difference Between A Rabi And A Priest One Cuts Them Off And One Sucks Them Off

What’s the opposite of an exorcism? It’s when Satan has to tell the priest to come out of the child.

A married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover comes over, she puts her nine year old son in the closet. One day, the woman hears a car in the driveway and puts her lover in the closet with her son. Inside the closet, the little boy says, “It’s dark in here, isn’t it?” “Yes it is,” the man replies. “You wanna buy a baseball?” the little boy

Whats similar between a priest and McDonalds? They both shove their meat inbetween 10 year old buns

What’s the difference between a peanut and a priest? With a peanut, you have to break the shell open for the nut to come out.

What do Catholic priests and school shooters have in common? They both like to dump their loads into little kids.

They should add an eleventh commandment to the Bible: Thou shalt not f… altar boys

What to gift a child molester , who already has everything ? A bigger county with more believers

Did you hear about the new Exorcist movie? The Devil came to get the Priest out of the child.

my uncle was a preist he had a two-inch penis but when it was in my ass it felt like a torpedo

What is a reverse exorcism? It is when the Devil tries to pull a priest out of a child.

A bus full of Nuns falls of a cliff and they all die. They arrive at the gates of heaven and meet St. Peter. St. Peter says to them “Sisters, welcome to Heaven. In a moment I will let you all though the pearly gates, but before I may do that, I must ask each of you a single question. ” St. Peter turns to the first Nun in the line and asks her “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” The Sister Responds “Well… there was this one time… that I kinda sorta… touched one with the tip of my pinky finger…” St. Peter says “Alright Sister, now dip the tip of your pinky finger in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted.” and she did so. St. Peter now turns to the second nun and says “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” “Well…. There was this one time… that I held one for a moment…” “Alright Sister, now just wash your hands in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted” and she does so. Now at this, there is a noise, a jostling in the line. It seems that one nun is trying to cut in front of another! St. Peter sees this and asks the Nun “Sister Susan, what is this? There is no rush!” Sister Susan responds “Well if I’m going to have to gargle this stuff, I’d rather do it before Sister Mary sticks her ass in it!” A priest, a rapist, a pedophile and a homosexual walk into a bar… He orders a drink.

Johnny is walking along and a priest is coming the other way. Johnny says, “Hey, mister, why are you wearing your collar backwards?” The priest says, “Because I’m a father.” Johnny says, “Yeah? Well, my old man’s got three kids and he don’t wear his collar backwards.” The priest says “You don’t understand, son. I have thousands of children. ” Johnny says, “You should wear your f@ckin’ trousers backwards.”