Priest jokes

3 nuns are talking and the first nun says, “u would never believe what i discovered.” intrigued, the other to signal her to continue. " i found a phone in the priests room." said the first nun. “oh thats nothing said the second one, i found condoms in one of his drawers.” said the second one. " what did u do with them." said the first nun. pridefully the second nun responds with, " i poked holes in all of them." and the third nun says, “oh sh*t…”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why is that kid walking like that?, Oh, he’s an alter boy

-2 -1 0 +1 +2


What is a reverse exorcism? It is when the Devil tries to pull a priest out of a child.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

How do you get a nun pregnant? – Dress her up as an alter boy.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

A married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover comes over, she puts her nine year old son in the closet. One day, the woman hears a car in the driveway and puts her lover in the closet with her son. Inside the closet, the little boy says, “It’s dark in here, isn’t it?” “Yes it is,” the man replies. “You wanna buy a baseball?” the little boy

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

When a Muslim dies he gets 72 virgins. It’s the same thing with priests except the virgins are children.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Roses are red, don’t touch the toys, these are what the priests use to lure in the boys.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2


Whats similar between a priest and McDonalds? They both shove their meat inbetween 10 year old buns

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

One day, a priest is walking down the street and sees a little girl with a box. “What’s in the box?”, the priest asks. “Christian kittens”, the little girl answers. Pleased, the priest smiles and continues on his way. A week later, the same priest is walking down the street with a nun when he sees the little girl and the box again. “Ask her what she has in the box”, he says, “It’s the cutest thing!” The nun walks up and asks the girl what she has in the box. “Atheist kittens”, she says. The priest rushes forward and says "ATHEIST KITTENS!!! Last week you said they were “Christian kittens! !!” “They were”, she says. “Now their eyes are open”.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Say all you want about priests but at least they drive slowly in school zones On a hot summers day a famous celebrity tweeted " it is a beautiful day and I`m deciding which kid to have fun with today" to which the local priest replied " I too am deciding which of your kids to have fun with today".

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What do priest and doctors have in common? They both do physicals on kids.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *


© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2026