Puns jokes

I hate how funerals are always at 9 a.m. – I’m not really a mourning person.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What do you call an alligator with a vest? An investigator.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

little johnny was siting in class one day and the teacher was talking about life and ask him " little johnny how do you want your wife to be like" and he answered " like the moon" and the teacher said " that’s such a beautiful answer because it calm and peaceful " and little htm title=' appears at night and disappears in the morning'>johnny said " no because it appears at night and disappears in the morning"

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Dont trust atoms they make up everything.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Confucius say, man who runs behind car will get exhausted, but man who runs in front of car will get tired.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I got hit in the head with a can of soda yesterday. Luckily for me, it was a soft drink.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

My boss yelled at me the other day, “You’ve got to be the worst train driver in history. How many trains did you derail last year? ” I said, “Can’t say for sure, it’s so hard to keep track!”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

If trees could kill you, they wood.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

I’ve just been fired from the clock making factory after all those extra hours I put in.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What does a spy do when he’s cold? He goes under cover.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What do you call 100 rabbits walking backwards? A receding hare line. How do you cut ancient Rome in half? With a pair of Caesars.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I Googled “How to start a Wildfire”. I got 48,500 matches.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Thanks for explaining the word “many” to me, it means a lot.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

You know why I don’t buy Velcro items anymore? They are a total rip off.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I was addicted to the hokey pokey… but thankfully, I turned myself around.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
- up - << N E X T! >> random

© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2026