Puns jokes

I would tell you a construction pun, but I’m still working on it

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I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker. But when I got home, all the signs were there.

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What does a spy do when he’s cold? He goes under cover.

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Where did the cat go when it lost it’s tail? – To the retail store!

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So what if I can’t spell Armageddon? It’s not the end of the world

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If drinking alcohol makes you an alcoholic, does drinking fanta make you fantastic?

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I’d tell a sodium and hydrogen pun, but NaH

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If you’re waiting for the waiter at a restaurant, aren’t you the waiter?

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I named my dog 5-Miles so now I tell people I walk 5-Miles everyday

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I bought a wooden whistle. But it wooden whistle. so I bought a steel whistle. But it steel wooden whistle. So I bought a lead whistle. But it steel wooden lead me whistle.

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Why did the picture go to jail? Cause it was framed!

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What do you call 100 rabbits walking backwards? A receding hare line. How do you cut ancient Rome in half? With a pair of Caesars.

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Communist jokes aren’t funny unless everyone gets them.

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Why doesn’t the Sun go to college? – Because it has a million degrees.

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If trees could kill you, they wood.

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