I named my dog 5-Miles so now I tell people I walk 5-Miles everyday
Have you ever tried eating a clock? It’s really time-consuming, especially if you go for seconds.
What is the best thing about living in Switzerland? – Well, the flag is a big plus.
Two windmills are standing in a field and one asks the other, “What kind of music do you like?” – The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”
Why were the Middle Ages called the Dark Ages? Because there were too many knights.
RIP boiling water. You will be mist. There was a guy who got his entire left side cut off. Don’t worry, he is all right now.
Hear about the restaurant called karma? There is no menu: You get what you deserve
Why did the blind man fall down the well? He just couldn’t see that well.
I have a fear of speed bumps But i am slowly getting over it
What does a spy do when he’s cold? He goes under cover.
Two artists had an art contest. – It ended in a draw.
a mexican was doing a magic trick he said “uno, dos,” then disappeared without a trace
A prisoner was told how he’ll be executed. Needless to say, he was shocked.
I have many jokes about unemployed people, sadly none of them work.
I once ate a watch. It was time consuming.
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