“Doctor, there’s a patient on line 1 that says he’s invisible” “Well, tell him I can’t see him right now.”
I once ate a watch. It was time consuming.
What do you call an alligator with a vest? An investigator.
Confucius say, man who runs behind car will get exhausted, but man who runs in front of car will get tired.
My ex-wife still misses me. But her aim is steadily improving.
Will glass coffins be a success? – Remains to be seen.
My boss yelled at me the other day, “You’ve got to be the worst train driver in history. How many trains did you derail last year? ” I said, “Can’t say for sure, it’s so hard to keep track!”
There was a kidnapping at school… Don?t worry, he woke up.
The past, the present, and the future walk into a bar… It was tense.
Last night I had a dream that I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda. I guess it was just a Fanta sea!
New Teslas don’t come with a new car smell they come with an Elon Musk
Dont trust atoms they make up everything.
I have a fear of speed bumps But i am slowly getting over it
Communist jokes aren’t funny unless everyone gets them.
Two artists had an art contest. – It ended in a draw.
RUS | ENG
