Puns jokes

A prisoner was told how he’ll be executed. Needless to say, he was shocked.

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I’ve never worn my gay sweater, it hasn’t come out of the closet yet

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I would tell you a construction pun, but I’m still working on it

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Why doesn’t the Sun go to college? – Because it has a million degrees.

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What is the best thing about living in Switzerland? – Well, the flag is a big plus.

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You wanna know why I hate circles so much? They’re just so pointless! But I guess that’s how they roll

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I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. – A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

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I wanted to make a belt out of watches, then I realized, it was a waist of time!

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I entered ten puns into a contest to see which one would win. No pun in ten did

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Yesterday, a clown held the door open for me. It was such a nice jester! :D

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What do you call it when a midget waves at you? A microwave

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What did the guy exclaim after inventing the shovel? It is ground breaking!

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So what if I can’t spell Armageddon? It’s not the end of the world

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Two deer walk out of a gay bar. One of them turns to the other and says, “I can’t believe I blew forty bucks in there.”

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Claustrophobic people are more productive thinking out of the box.

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