My poor knowledge of Greek mythology has always been my Achilles’ elbow.
An atom loses an electron… It says, “Man, I really gotta keep an ion them.”
What do you call a girl with an hourglass figure? – A waist of time.
I accidentally drank a little food colouring last night. I ended up dying inside.
Hear about the restaurant called karma? There is no menu: You get what you deserve
How does Moses prepare his tea? – Hebrews it.
I would tell you a construction pun, but I’m still working on it
Confucius say, man who runs behind car will get exhausted, but man who runs in front of car will get tired.
You wanna know why I hate circles so much? They’re just so pointless! But I guess that’s how they roll
Claustrophobic people are more productive thinking out of the box.
When the chair was invented, the inventor’s friend wanted to know what it did. The inventor replied: ‘You might want to sit down for this.’
I named my dog 5-Miles so now I tell people I walk 5-Miles everyday
little johnny was siting in class one day and the teacher was talking about life and ask him " little johnny how do you want your wife to be like" and he answered " like the moon" and the teacher said " that’s such a beautiful answer because it calm and peaceful " and little htm title=' appears at night and disappears in the morning'>johnny said " no because it appears at night and disappears in the morning"
Why was the ocean so blue? Because the island never waved back.
Do you know how to make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
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