Vladimir Putin, Donald Trump and Angela Merkel are standing at the shore and are trying to impress each other with the accomplishments of their countries. Putin brags „We have nuclear submarines which can stay under water for six weeks without having to resurface!“. Trump goes on „Six weeks? That’s nothing. I have the best submarines, they‘re underwater fur at least three months!“. Merkel is about to respond, when a giant steel colossus emerges from the sea. A hatch opens, a black uniform appears - „Heil Hitler! We need Diesel.“ How does the sea say hello It WAVES you SEA what I did their I’m SHORE you saw it Don’t be SALTY
What does an cannibal call people in water Sea food
Why does this Stingray’s wife can’t stop babbling? Cause, she can’t watch her mouth.
why was the sea so friendly because it gave a little wave
Why do Pirates say “Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!” ? First time out at sea, they prepare for battle and say to their commander: “The canons be ready Captain!” “Are” says the Captain (correcting their grammar) “Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! !!” they all exclaimed !!
what did the the sea do when it seen the beach it waved
I’ve always wanted to WAVE to a dolphin, but it could never SEA me. That dolphin is so WASHED up. WATER you say we get revenge?
There are plenty more fish in the sea is the last thing you should say to a necrophiliac
Why do seagulls fly over the sea and not the bay? Because then they would be called bagels!??????????????????????????
Once there were twins, Mark and Michael, Mark was the owner of a old boat. It so happened that Michael’s wife died the same day that Mark’s boat sank. A few days later, a kindly old woman saw Mark and mistook him for Michael. She said, "I’m sorry to hear about your loss. You must just feel terrible. "Mark, thinking that she was talking about his boat, said, “Heck no. In fact, I’m sort of glad to be rid of her. She was a rotten old thing right from the beginning. Her bottom was all shrivelled up and she smelled like old dead fish. She was always losing her water; she had a bad crack in the back and a pretty big hole in the front too. Every time I used her, her hole got bigger and she leaked like crazy. I guess what finally finished her off was when I rented her to these four guys looking for a good time. I warned them that she wasn’t very good, but they wanted to use her anyhow. The fools tried to get in her all at once and she split right up the middle! ” The old lady fainted. ????????????
What’s the difference between a piano and a fish? You can tune a piano, but you can’t tuna fish!
I’m on sea- food diet, I see food and eat it.
Why can’t blind people have a sea food diet? They have to see the food to eat
What did the beach say as the tide came in? Long time, no sea.
Q: If Adolf Hitler was a sea creature which would he be? A: Adlof-in What does Osama bin Laden have in common with Spongebob? Both can be found at the bottom of the sea, filled full of holes.
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