a guy stuffed some cigarrets up his eyes thinking it would make him see colors. The next day he could see only one color… Black
I don’t drink, don’t swear, don’t smoke, shit, I left my cigerates at the f@cking bar! (Andrew Dice Clay.)
A bear and a rabbit are at a bar getting high smoking weed talking about nothing but lies and straight up garbage. and then the bear starts to drink too much damn liquor gets drunk and ask the rabbit can i have one more scotch pretty please? And the rabbit says hell to the naw I’m not about to carry your drunk ass home with me and smell your breath.
A father of five puts on gas mask and a hazard suit, and walks outside, but before he could make it, his son came and asked “Dad, what are you wearing?”. The father would answer with “A costume for Halloween.”. the child asked “can i join?”. He said no, for he said it’s their last Halloween. *after that, I saw green smoke all over the same house they lived in.
September 2020: Three makeup tutorialists, James Charles, Jeffree Star and Tati Westbrook has gone through smoke after the controversy surrounding the three of them. Honestly, Tati and Jeffree are trash, I just don’t find their content interesting, and I don’t watch James Charles, but I also dislike his content. Ok heres ur funi jokeee Who is the best makeup artist? Just because Jeffree has Star at the end doesn’t mean he is best
Cool, new word of the day: Marijuana. “Does Marry wanna smoke a joint?”
What kind of cigarettes does a hippie smoke? Yours.
what do you call a guy in a wheelchair smoking weed? a baked potato
Last week I felt so high and mighty I thought I could fly I took one shot puffed through my pipe and jumped in the air on a trampoline I woke up in heaven. I asked an angel how did I die you? "Well little monkey you thought your bed was a trampoline and you hit your head your mom called the doctor and doctor said you were dead.
in america 1 in 10 houses there are a paedophiles not me i live next to a smoking hot 8 year old Me: “What are you doing??” Bully: “Where’s my nan’s urn?!?” Me: “I don’t know.” Bully: “Tell me!! says worthless shit” Me: “Next time you’re looking for the urn, don’t bother, I smoked her ashes. They were so f@cking good. I then used a quarter of them as an exfoliator, cleared my acne and eczema btw!! Then built sandcastles with them, then blew them in your family’s face after!” Don’t bully kids.
When the school shooter throws a smoke bomb into the classroom and the autistic kid thinks it’s a dance party.
A couple of cows were smoking a joint and playing cards… The steaks were pretty high
After a lord comes back from vacation, he meets the gardener at the gates of his park. Lord: Has something happened while I was gone? Gardener: Ah, nothing much, I just broke a shovel while I was burrying your dog. Lord: My dog died?! Gardener: Yes, it choked on the smoke when your mansion burnt down. Lord: My mansion?! How?! Gardener: Well, your wife was distraught and dropped a candle on the curtains. Lord: Why was she so distraught? Gardener: She received the news of your daughter being kidnapped. Lord: My daughter! Don’t you have any positive news for me? ! Gardener: Oh right! Your cancer test results!
what does a shark smoke sea-WEED how do whales breathe under water they take a deep METH
Don’t Touch My Truck-By: Breland and Sam Hunt You can drink my liquor You can call my lady You can take my money You can smoke my blunt Scuff these Jordans You can say you hate me You can call me crazy, but Don’t touch my truck (skrrt, skrrt) Skrrt (yeah, yeah) Skrrt Don’t touch my truck (brrp, yeah) Skrrt (woo-oh) Skrrt Don’t touch my V8 engine with
RUS | ENG
