Smoking jokes

I saw a sign the other day that said "Maximum penalty for smoking is ?1,000" But that’s not right. Surely the maximum penalty for smoking is Death.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2


A father of five puts on gas mask and a hazard suit, and walks outside, but before he could make it, his son came and asked “Dad, what are you wearing?”. The father would answer with “A costume for Halloween.”. the child asked “can i join?”. He said no, for he said it’s their last Halloween. *after that, I saw green smoke all over the same house they lived in.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What time is it when you can smell smoke ?? inside? Time to get outside

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

what do you call 1 normal kid,and 2 retarded kids,smoking weed? pot roast.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

How is smoking similar to oral sex? The closer to the butt you get the stronger the flavor! ??

-2 -1 0 +1 +2


Damn girl, are you a smoke detector? Because you’re super annoying and won’t shut up.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Please Fokes you can hit the thumbs up button on the ones you like. There is no need to repost… Anyways Knock knock Who’s there? Can I come in? Can I come in who? Can I Come In You!? More often than not, I will cry when I masturbate… Some nights I’m a real tear jerker! But on the nights and I smoke a lil pot and then masturbate, my dad ends up bugging me because I am a weed wacker. How do you keep a dog from humping your leg? Pick him up and suck his dick. How does Popeye keep his manly part from rusting? He sticks it in Olive Oil. Snow White and the seven dwarfs are in the the tub feeling “HAPPY”. Happy got out now they are f@cking “GRUMPY” What’s worse than waking up and finding a “Penis” drawn on your forehead? Finding out it was “Traced” If I had a rooster and you had a donkey and your donkey ate my rooster what would you have? 3 feet of my cock up your ass Did you know Batman was actually Black? Yeah he couldn’t go a night with out Robyn! Did you hear Gods Word Of The Day? Its Legs! Now lets go out and spread them. What do you call a Mexican woman with no legs? Cunt-sway-low Whats worse than sucking 25 oysters out of your Grandmas Pussy? Realizing you only put in 15

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana, Jack got high and grabbed her thigh and said you know you wanna. Jill said yes and lifted her dress so they could have some fun, but stupid Jill forgot her pill and now they have a son.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

A little chimney said: “Ooooh, I think my house owner is making a fire in me! I’m about to smoke!!” The big chimney said next to him: “Well, your to young to smoke…”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why did the guy get the hose Because the girl was smoking hot

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *


© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2026