After a lord comes back from vacation, he meets the gardener at the gates of his park. Lord: Has something happened while I was gone? Gardener: Ah, nothing much, I just broke a shovel while I was burrying your dog. Lord: My dog died?! Gardener: Yes, it choked on the smoke when your mansion burnt down. Lord: My mansion?! How?! Gardener: Well, your wife was distraught and dropped a candle on the curtains. Lord: Why was she so distraught? Gardener: She received the news of your daughter being kidnapped. Lord: My daughter! Don’t you have any positive news for me? ! Gardener: Oh right! Your cancer test results!
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high and touched Jill’s thigh and said “I know you wanna.” Jill said yes, took off her dress and then they had some fun. But silly Jill forgot her pills and now they have a son.
a guy stuffed some cigarrets up his eyes thinking it would make him see colors. The next day he could see only one color… Black
Yo mama so stupid she though seaweed was something fish smoke
A couple of cows were smoking a joint and playing cards… The steaks were pretty high
What do you do if your girlfriend starts smoking? Stop and apply lubrication.
A bear and a rabbit are at a bar getting high smoking weed talking about nothing but lies and straight up garbage. and then the bear starts to drink too much damn liquor gets drunk and ask the rabbit can i have one more scotch pretty please? And the rabbit says hell to the naw I’m not about to carry your drunk ass home with me and smell your breath.
One day a son and his grandad were smoking, too bad only the sun was smoking. :) -Dark_Humor
My ex-wife was smoking pot with Snow White, when the 7 dwarf’s saw them they sang… “Look at those high Ho’s! Hiiiiiiii Hoooooo’sssss!!!”
What is the difference between cremation and smoking? while you are smoking you don’t go up in smoke
crappy joke warning how does spongbob have fun he smokes seaweed
What Did Rapper Pop Smoke get high off of? Cigarettes with Pop & Smoke.
One day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa smoking his cigarettes. Little Johnny asked, “Grandpa, can I smoke some of your cigarettes?” His grandpa replied, “Can your penis reach your asshole?” “No”, said Little Johnny. His grandpa replied, “Then you’re not old enough.” The next day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa drinking beer. He asked, “Grandpa, can I drink some of your beer?” His grandpa replied, “Can your penis reach your asshole?” “No” said Little Johhny. “Then you’re not old enough.” his grandpa replied. The next day, Little Johnny was eating cookies. His grandpa asked, “Can I have some of your cookies?” Little Johnny replied, “Can your penis reach your asshole?” His grandpa replied, “It most certainly can!” Little Johnny replied, "Then go f@ck yourself
Cremation: My last hope for a smoking hot body.
I saw a sign the other day that said "Maximum penalty for smoking is ?1,000" But that’s not right. Surely the maximum penalty for smoking is Death.
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