I was on a bus when this girl offered to blow me for $5… ?…and never being a person to pass up a good deal, I gave her $5 and watched her do her thing. After she was finished she lit up a cigarette and started smoking right there on the bus. I was disgusted. I thought to myself, “What is this world coming to? Who sells cigarettes to a 12 year old?”
I would like to remind all passengers that this is a no-smoking flight, although do feel free to join me in the cockpit, where we’ve opened a window.
What is the difference between cremation and smoking? while you are smoking you don’t go up in smoke
Three friends are in a hotel room in Soviet Russia. The first two men open a bottle of vodka, while the third is tired and goes straight to bed. He is unable to sleep however, as his increasingly drunk friends tell political jokes loudly. After a while, the tired man gets frustrated and walks downstairs for a smoke. He stops in the lounge and asks the receptionist to bring tea to their room in five minutes. The man walks back into the room, joins the table, leans towards a power outlet and speaks into it: “Comrade major, we want some tea to room 62 please.” His friends laugh on the joke, until there is a knock on the door. The receptionist brings a teapot. His friends fall silent and pale, horrified of what they just witnessed. The party is dead, and the man goes to sleep. After a good night’s rest, the man wakes up, and notices his friends are gone. Surprised, he walks downstairs and asks the receptionist where they went. The nervous receptionist whispers that KGB came and took them before dawn. The man is horrified. He wonders why he was spared. The receptionist responds: “Well, comrade major did quite like your tea joke.”
what was the last thing that went through PH’s head? water and smoke
He: “Do you smoke after sex?” She: “I don’t know. I’ve never looked.”
What do you call Mexican that smokes weed.a Baked bean
Please Fokes you can hit the thumbs up button on the ones you like. There is no need to repost… Anyways Knock knock Who’s there? Can I come in? Can I come in who? Can I Come In You!? More often than not, I will cry when I masturbate… Some nights I’m a real tear jerker! But on the nights and I smoke a lil pot and then masturbate, my dad ends up bugging me because I am a weed wacker. How do you keep a dog from humping your leg? Pick him up and suck his dick. How does Popeye keep his manly part from rusting? He sticks it in Olive Oil. Snow White and the seven dwarfs are in the the tub feeling “HAPPY”. Happy got out now they are f@cking “GRUMPY” What’s worse than waking up and finding a “Penis” drawn on your forehead? Finding out it was “Traced” If I had a rooster and you had a donkey and your donkey ate my rooster what would you have? 3 feet of my cock up your ass Did you know Batman was actually Black? Yeah he couldn’t go a night with out Robyn! Did you hear Gods Word Of The Day? Its Legs! Now lets go out and spread them. What do you call a Mexican woman with no legs? Cunt-sway-low Whats worse than sucking 25 oysters out of your Grandmas Pussy? Realizing you only put in 15
When the school shooter throws a smoke grenade into the classroom and the autistic kid thinks it’s a Disco party. ??????
What Did The Dirt Say To The Embers? You Look Smoking Hot.
Zebra couldn’t find any grass then he saw the monkey cooking he thought to steal a little but he was burned in the fore and th smoke was all over him but when htm title=' and zebras are stuck in this stile forever'>he to the ocean it’s still there and zebras are stuck in this stile forever
My ex-wife was smoking pot with Snow White, when the 7 dwarf’s saw them they sang… “Look at those high Ho’s! Hiiiiiiii Hoooooo’sssss!!!”
How is smoking similar to oral sex? The closer to the butt you get the stronger the flavor! ??
Two plus two is four Minus one, that’s three, quick maths Every day, man’s on the block Smoke trees (Ah) See your girl in the park That girl is a uckers When the ting went quack-quack-quack You man were ducking (You man ducked) Hold tight, Asznee (My brudda) He’s got the pumpy (Big ting) Hold tight, my man (My guy) He’s got the frisbee (Few) I trap, trap, trap on the phone Movin’ that cornflakes (Uh) Rice Krispies Hold tight, my girl Whitney (My G) On, on, on, on, on the road doin’ 10 toes Like my toes (Like my toes) You man thought I froze I see a peng girl, then I pose (Chilin’) If she ain’t on it, I ghost Hah, look at your nose (Check your nose, fam) You donut Nose long like garden hose
One day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa smoking his cigarettes. Little Johnny asked, “Grandpa, can I smoke some of your cigarettes?” His grandpa replied, “Can your penis reach your asshole?” “No”, said Little Johnny. His grandpa replied, “Then you’re not old enough.” The next day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa drinking beer. He asked, “Grandpa, can I drink some of your beer?” His grandpa replied, “Can your penis reach your asshole?” “No” said Little Johhny. “Then you’re not old enough.” his grandpa replied. The next day, Little Johnny was eating cookies. His grandpa asked, “Can I have some of your cookies?” Little Johnny replied, “Can your penis reach your asshole?” His grandpa replied, “It most certainly can!” Little Johnny replied, "Then go f@ck yourself
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