Smoking jokes

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My doctor is a very attractive woman; gorgeous face, nice boobs, smoking hot body. She said to me, “You are in your 50’s now, you have GOT to stop masturbating. ” I asked why. She replied, “Because I’m trying to examine you, ya’ pervert!!!”

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A little chimney said: “Ooooh, I think my house owner is making a fire in me! I’m about to smoke!!” The big chimney said next to him: “Well, your to young to smoke…”

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Don’t Touch My Truck-By: Breland and Sam Hunt You can drink my liquor You can call my lady You can take my money You can smoke my blunt Scuff these Jordans You can say you hate me You can call me crazy, but Don’t touch my truck (skrrt, skrrt) Skrrt (yeah, yeah) Skrrt Don’t touch my truck (brrp, yeah) Skrrt (woo-oh) Skrrt Don’t touch my V8 engine with

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A kid is arrested for a school shooting threat he is then apprehended and asked why he wanted to do this. He responds with “what do you mean I already did it” then the police ran back to the school to aprehend the other people he was planing it with the cops busted in through the doors which caused a smoke trap to go off which then the cops saw three people walk in and the police begin to fire. But as the smoke began to clear the cops saw that the three people were 16 kids duck taped to rolling poles 4 per pole. Back to the station holding the kid being apprehended. the kid puts his feet up on a chair and said “Aww it pays to be lazy!”

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VOTING QUARTERFINAL 3: LIKE: When the school shooter throws a smoke grenade into the classroom and the autistic kid thinks it’s a Disco party. ?????? DISLIKE: When the school shooter gets killed and everyone is cheering but you walk toward his gun; “I will finish what you started.” Vote for the better joke

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