Pinocchio goes to the doctor for a checkup. When he gets there the doctor asks him “Do you have cancer?” Pinocchio replies, “That was very straight up, but, no I’m pretty sure I don’t have cancer.” After saying this, his nose grew.
Jim’s car is swerving all over the road so a cop pulls him over, “Step out of the car” says the cop, “I am going to need you to take a breathalyzer test.” “I can’t”, Jim responds “You see I have very bad asthma, that can set off an attack.” “Alright,” says the cop, “then you’re going to have to take a blood test.” “Can’t do that either,” Jim responds, “I am a hemophiliac, if a wound is opened, I won’t stop bleeding, and I could bleed to death.” “Ok,” the cop answers “then I will need a urine sample.” “Sorry,” says Jim “I also have diabetes, that could push my sugar count really low.” “Fine, so just come on out, and walk a straight line for me.” “Can’t do that either” responds Jim. “Why not?” Demanded the exasperated cop. “Well, because I’m drunk!”
why can’t lgbtq+ members be straight cause they are lgbtq they are loser
im hertophobic- aka im allergic to all straight guys
My mom said that being straight is good but if your straight how do you walk so i decided to be gay
Going to church, you don’t think, you are Christian. Sleeping with ten men, You don’t think, you are straight.
My brother caught Covid last month. First I knew about it was when he speed-dialled me at 3am and gasped, ‘I can’t breathe, I can’t breathe !’ I just told him straight: ‘Bro… you really need to work on your George Floyd jokes.’
I was digging in our garden when I found a chest full of gold coins. I was about to run straight home to tell my wife about it, but then I remembered why I was digging in our garden.
I don’t ever really bother women, but when I do I usually just want to talk, I guess since I just so happened to be a straight male that’s not a 10 or a 5 , I get shutdown so fast , I put out lit candles…like damn, I thought I hid my ring
Straights are ALWAYS asking LGBTQ+ people why they have such GOOD FASHION SENSE, we didn’t spend all that time in the closet for nothing,honey ;)
Bisexuals aren’t gay Bisexuals aren’t straight They’re graight ??
Me and my friend got in to a fight I look straight forward and said look me in my eyes
We wrote letters to a kid with cancer. My letter read “its a bumpy road but soon u will have a straight path.” People didnt realize it was meant for his heart monitor.
A straight man and a gay man are talking, the straight man says, “I’m wanted in 2 states for murder.” and the gay man replies with, “oh, that sucks. I’m wanted in 13 for existing.”
Straight people ask why gays have such a good fashion sense. Baby we didn’t spend all that time in the closet for nothing.
RUS | ENG