Straight jokes

Ten Catholic priests all die in a bus accident. When they arrive at the pearly gates, St. Peter acknowledges them. He sees that they’re all priests and immediately says "If any of you are pedophiles, there’s no point waiting here. You might as well eff off straight to hell right now!” Nine of the priests turn around and begin to walk away. St. Peter calls after them, "AND TAKE THE DEAF BASTARD WITH YOU TOO!”

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Straights are ALWAYS asking LGBTQ+ people why they have such GOOD FASHION SENSE, we didn’t spend all that time in the closet for nothing,honey ;)

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you when you face the boss the first time: :) you when dark souls boss music starts playing on the second phase: :( you when you ask why do you hear boss music: <( you when the boss goes straight to his final phase after 1 hit: . .

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If you gay then wtf u doin tryna walk straight

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I’m so gay I could barely think straight.

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Why can North Korea draw a straight line? Because they’ve got a supreme ruler

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Straight people ask why gays have such a good fashion sense. Baby we didn’t spend all that time in the closet for nothing.

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My friend said to me that I am gay my response I’m as straight as that pole that your mum danced on last night

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POV: You liked this joke because your straight

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Are you a Bullet because you go straight throw my head

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You know we straight with doin your mom

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Father : “That’s great son. Who is she?” Son: “It’s Tina, the neighbor’s daughter”. Father : “Ohhh I wish you hadn’t said that.I have to tell u something son, but you must promise not to tell your mother.Tina is actually your sister.” The boy is naturally bummed out, but a couple of months later Son : “Daddy, I fell in love again and she is even hotter!” Father : “That’s great son. Who is she?” Son: “It’s Peny, the other neighbor’s daughter.” Father : “Ohhhh I wish you hadn’t said that. Peny is also your sister.” This went on couple of times and the son was so mad,he went straight to his mother crying. Son : “Mum I am so mad at dad ! I fell in love with six girls but I can’t date any of them because daddy is their father!” The mother hugs him affectionately and says: “My love, you can date whoever you want. Don’t listen to him. He is not your Father.”!!!

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The only thing I do straight is vodka

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When I was in 4th grade, we wrote letters to kids in the hospital. I wrote: It is a bumpy road but soon it will be a straight path. Not many people know I was talking about their heart monitor.

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Me;you stupid Guy;you straight Me;sorry I’m not a mirror

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