Straight jokes

what do you call a lazy gay? someone who comes straight out of the closet,and goes straight to the couch.

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The only thing I do straight is vodka

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In Africa, it doesn’t matter if you’re gay, straight or bisexual. At the end of the day, it’s night.

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========================= (pre-election 2016) Trump Hating Comedian at seedy East L.A. comedy club - "Hey how "bout that Donald Trump chump… what the f@ck up with that dude, man ? “Geeeezus, he got some kuh-razy ass shit spewing endlessly out that pie-hole, 24/8!” (< leap week, muthafukas !) . . . "I mean, even his last name rhymes with shit

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Two men are in a rainforest and one of them is peeing. Suddenly a snake jumps out of some bushes and bites the man’s penis. The other man says, “ Oh my God, I will go to a doctor immediately!”. He didn’t have enough time to load the man into the car so he went straight to the hospital. The man told the doctor what happened and the doctor said, “You will have to make an incision at the wound and suck the poison out. The man wen back to the other man and said, “ There is no hope, you will die.”

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3 blonde sisters die and are told by an angel that in order for them to go to heaven they have to pass all 100 steps. But each step has a joke , each joke gets funnier and funnier. And in order to pass them all, you can’t laugh at any joke or else you go to hell. The blonde girls accept the offer. So the angel begins telling them the joke, one of the girls laughs at the 3rd step. The second blonde laugjhs halfway there. Finally, the last blonde was at the 100th step. The angel said ‘‘this is the last step if you laugh you will go straight to hell with your sisters and if you don’t you can pass. The blonde agrees and the angel starts to tell the joke, ‘‘What do you ca…’’ out of nowhere the blonde starts bursting out laughing. ‘‘Why are you laughing I haven’t even finished the joke yet’’? The blonde replies ‘’ I just got the first joke’’.

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Bisexuals aren’t gay Bisexuals aren’t straight They’re graight ??

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NWA: Straight Outta Compton Kobe Bryant: Straight Outta the Helicopter

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My friend said “Dude, if you don’t put your desk in line with the column, your gay.” so he did it and i said “Well i guess now he’s straight” ;D

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This boy said get get yo hairline straight I said girls don’t have a hairline how about you go to the barber shop htm title=' times worst then he did the first time.'>and let your barber do your hair 10 times worst then he did the first time.

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I was digging in our garden when I found a chest full of gold coins. I was about to run straight home to tell my wife about it, but then I remembered why I was digging in our garden.

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im hertophobic- aka im allergic to all straight guys

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An old man gets the call from the IRS The man on the phone says, “we’ve noticed large sums of money coming in and going out of your account constantly and we gotta get this straight. Come in tomorrow and we’ll have a chat about this.” The old man thinks for a while and then decides he better get his lawyer to come with him. The next day the old man and his lawyer

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My friend said to me that I am gay my response I’m as straight as that pole that your mum danced on last night

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I went to school with a gay guy who was really smart, but he always got mad that he got straight A’s instead of getting all the D’s

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