What do you do when you see a sad orphan? Nothing let them wait for their parents.
My therapist told me that time heals all wounds. So I stabbed him, now we wait
Me telling depression and suicide joke in front of my friends. My friends: … oh wait i dont have any, so nothin to worry about here.
What’s the difference between a Catholic priest and a zit? A zit will wait until you’re twelve before it comes on your face.
A thief walks up to a man in a suit and pulls out a gun. The Thief says: “Give me your money.” The man in the suit turns around surprised. He raises his hands and says: “But, wait! You can’t do that, I am a Congressman!” The thief replies: “Oh, sorry. Give me MY money.”
One dark stormy night when i was 8 years old I woke up in the middle of the night busting to pee, half asleep i walked down the stairs and toward the bathroom and heard a strange whirring sound that sounded like a ghost. When I opened the door i felt a strange cool breeze and the light came on automatically and the ghostly sound stopped, terrified I did what I had to and went back to bed. The next 3 nights the same thing happened and finally i decided i had to tell my mom no matter how hard to believe it sounded. The next night I woke up I went into my parents room and woke my mom up and said, “you have to come with me and see this it’s really important,” Half asleep she murmured, "oh what is it can’t it wait until the morning?’ I pleaded, “no you have to come see, our bathroom is haunted by a ghost when I go in the middle of the night I can hear a ghost sound then when i open the door I feel the cold as it swoops through me and the light comes on automatically. ” She yawned and said, “oh so that’s who’s been peeing in the refrigerator.”
Guys stop making jokes about orphan’s parents will be told… oh wait
Friend: Want to play fall guys? Friend 2: Yup Friend: Ok so let me ju- wait where are you going? Friend 2: I’m gonna jump off Friend: Why? Friend 2: We are playing Fall Guys, right?
Q: What is the difference between a drunk and a stoner at a stop sign? A: The drunk guy runs it and the stoner waits for it to turn green!
Why’d the chicken cross the road? A: to get to the gay (guys/girls) house. (Wait awhile) then ask “knock knock?” Other person says “Who’s there?” A: the chicken
An Englishman, a Frenchman, a ravishing blonde and an old lady are sharing a compartment on a train as it winds its way through the Alps. Every now and then the train passes through a tunnel, during which time the compartment is plunged into complete darkness. On one such occasion, a ringing slap is heard and as the train passes back into daylight, the Frenchman is rubbing his sore, red cheek. The old lady thinks, “I bet that dirty Frenchman fondled the blonde and she struck the pervert.” The blonde thinks, “I bet that filthy Frenchman was looking to grope me in the dark, mistook the old lady for me and she slapped him.” The Frenchman thinks, “I bet that perfidious Englishman touched up the blonde in the dark and she slapped me by mistake.” The Englishman thinks, “I can’t wait for another tunnel so I can slap that French twat again.”
I can’t believe it’s been over a year since Kobe decided he’s too good to wait in traffic.
Can’t wait for the orphans to have their family reunion! Wait…
What is different about priests and acne. Acne waits until your 13 to cum on your face
My girlfriends last words I can’t wait to become a mom
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