Waiting jokes

My brother couldn’t wait for fall, so I tripped him.

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My therapist says with time all wounds can heal so I stabbed him now we wait

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How do you get an orphan to go to sleep?

Tell them there parent are waiting when the wake up.

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My mum told me to stop playing with my sister; she said at least wait for her to be born first.

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The F in orphan stands for family… oh wait

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Asian pregnancy test: Stick a Rubik cube into vagina. Wait 30 seconds, if it’s solved then there’s a little Asian in there.

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There was this kid who was going to take a girl to the dance. He had fancy clothes, fancy shoes, etc. Finally, the day of the dance came. He happily drove over to the girl’s house. When he got there, he said to her father “thank you for this moment, have a great night”. At the dance, the girl asks the boy, “can I have some food?” He gladly replies “yes” and walks over to the food trucks, only to see a huge line. So he waits in line for like 30 minutes. He comes back to the girl, and she says, “thank you so much, I really needed something to eat”. Then she asks for some sweets and a soda. Again the boy waits in line for about 30-45 minutes. Then he comes back, and she says, “thank you SOOOO much” Then she says she has one more request. The boy, (now clearly agitated) says, “what is it?” She says, can I have some punch? SO the boy walks over to the punch table, but to his surprise, there was no punch line.

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Sy’kyira: I can’t wait for the therapist to come.

Daina: Same, 30 minutes have passed … I also wonder what that loud sound is.

Sy’kyira: SAME!!! What does it sound like a woman suffering???

Daina: I know, right?

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Did you know the f in orphan stands for family…oh wait HAHA

We should stop making jokes about orphans before they tell there parents…oh continue

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Everyone: so wait let me get this straight feminist want to cancel fathers day because it is offensive to single mothers

Feminist: correct

Everyone: THEN WTF IS THE POINT OF MOTHERS DAY

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Why was I stress eating on the train track?

To wait to get hit.

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But she hasn’t tried the position with her new boyfriend. So she invites him to a romantic dinner. After dinner, she tells her boyfriend about her desire for it. But her boyfriend was clueless about such acts. So she tell him to strip naked on the couch and lay on top of him naked in the 69 positions. She starts sucking him off and starts waiting for him to do the same. But the bf didn’t know what to do, so he just lay there. Suddenly the girl had an urge to fart, but hold it in because her asshole was right near his bf face. Suddenly she loses control, and lets one out. She apologizes profusely and continues sucking him. A couple of minutes later, she feels the urge again and lets another fart rip near his face. The BF throws the girl from the couch, gets up, and says

“Bitch if you think I’ll be lying here for 67 more of those, you’re f@cking crazy.”

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My friend made this joke (so I’m going steal it) I’m surrounded by fat people, oh wait… it’s just one

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Q: What is the difference between a drunk and a stoner at a stop sign? A: The drunk guy runs it and the stoner waits for it to turn green!

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Hey can’t wait to meet you! So join the crippiling depression family!!

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