But she hasn’t tried the position with her new boyfriend. So she invites him to a romantic dinner. After dinner, she tells her boyfriend about her desire for it. But her boyfriend was clueless about such acts. So she tell him to strip naked on the couch and lay on top of him naked in the 69 positions. She starts sucking him off and starts waiting for him to do the same. But the bf didn’t know what to do, so he just lay there. Suddenly the girl had an urge to fart, but hold it in because her asshole was right near his bf face. Suddenly she loses control, and lets one out. She apologizes profusely and continues sucking him. A couple of minutes later, she feels the urge again and lets another fart rip near his face. The BF throws the girl from the couch, gets up, and says “Bitch if you think I’ll be lying here for 67 more of those, you’re f@cking crazy.”
my therapist says with time all wounds can heal so I stabbed him now we wait
I bought my son a fridge for Christmas. – I can’t wait to see his face light up when he opens it.
Once there was this Whichdoctor, he walked barefoot most of the time which gave him impressive calluses on his feet. He also ate very little and the food gave him bad breath. Which made him (wait for it), A Super Callused Fragile Mystic Hexed By Halitosis.
The secret to dark humor is the delivery… oh wait, the baby was stillborn.
I got my daughter a fridge for her birthday. I can’t wait to see her face light up when she opens it.
Me: Hey how are you? Depression: I’m doing fine. We are just looking for a home :3 Insomnia: Mommy can we get a home? Anxiety: Insomnia wait for mommy to finish. Depression: Anyway here is my resume! Me: Okie thank you, Ok… mhmmm… WOW! Okie this is a nice resume! (Didn’t Read it…) Depression: Also I have 2 more friends that want to move in too! Me: Ok and there names? Depression: There names are: PTSD and Trauma! Me: Ok they seem fine (Doesn’t know about them) Depression: Okie here is the money (a penny :() Thank you we will call you if we need anything. Me: Ok see you soon! :3 Me now hates my life. :)
I really hate waiting to die… Its taking a lifetime
Whoever kills Hitler goes to heaven. Oh, wait… nevermind…
What did the String Theorist say when his wife caught him in bed with another woman? Wait, I can explain everything!
A thief walks up to a man in a suit and pulls out a gun. The Thief says: “Give me your money.” The man in the suit turns around surprised. He raises his hands and says: “But, wait! You can’t do that, I am a Congressman!” The thief replies: “Oh, sorry. Give me MY money.”
My teacher said he is gonna call my dad, i cant wait to meet him ??????
Why’d the chicken cross the road? A: to get to the gay (guys/girls) house. (Wait awhile) then ask “knock knock?” Other person says “Who’s there?” A: the chicken
My mum told me to stop playing with my sister; she said at least wait for her to be born first.
I punched an orphan and told him to go back to his parents and tell them about it… oh wait
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